Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

barfcannon

Online | Search for a member

barfcannon

0Liked!

barfcannonbarfcannon
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 21 December 1993 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 962
  • Number of comments : 53
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About barfcannon : Extroverted when I have to be.
I love art, adventures and gloomy days.
Finished college and waiting for a job to fall on me.

barfcannon's page activity

Visits<b>GentlemanBastard</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 11:54am<b>Ravike</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 4:20am<b>ragingatheist</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 8:33am<b>kensiclee</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 7:33pm<b>MaryssaJean</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 5:43pm<b>mystery_user</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 10:28am<b>AviatOfficial</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 1:55am<b>cakelol</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 1:40am<b>how_about_no_</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 12:04am<b>MaybeMoo</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 5:08pm<b>xLIGHTS</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 5:06pm<b>SkittlesGoRawr</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 12:20am<b>Killer67a</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 1:27pm<b>abv96</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 9:15pm<b>weveallbeenthere</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 7:56pm<b>detectivedipsiht</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 7:19am<b>K410</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 9:15am<b>JulianR91</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 3:46pm

barfcannon's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of barfcannon's badges

barfcannon's favorite FMLs

Today, I looked out my window to see the sunset, but instead I see my neighbor dancing with strobe lights on and music blasting. He was by himself and had absolutely nothing on. FML

#16978964
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28744) - you deserved it (3803)

On 07/04/2011 at 10:38pm - intimacy - by danam - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I learned the hard way that yes, a fork can get stuck in your braces. FML

#16601397
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27675) - you deserved it (15015)

On 06/10/2011 at 9:32pm - health - by 8sq (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was in the elevator with my boss, when I let rip the vilest, most horrifying fart of my life as we left the first floor. We stood in silence as the elevator slowly ascended to the 21st floor, leaving us to marinate in the fumes. FML

#16516164
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16579) - you deserved it (41351)

On 06/05/2011 at 4:45pm - misc - by - United States

Today, I learned that when I leave skid marks in the toilet my wife uses my toothbrush to remove them. FML

#15598918
279 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33417) - you deserved it (45089)

On 04/02/2011 at 1:03am - misc - by Toothy (man) - United States (California)

Today, my cat died while walking around the kitchen. He had a heart attack when the toaster popped out two slices of bread. FML

#14753781
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48622) - you deserved it (3973) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/29/2011 at 3:09am - animals - by Anonymous - France

Today, I caught my daughter attempting to stick pencils up our cat's butt. FML

#14029442
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37974) - you deserved it (4768)

On 11/29/2010 at 10:03pm - kids - by Laura -

Today, my best friend was fired from the place we both work at because she's a bad employee. After they fired her she said, "If I go, I'm taking my best friend with me." So they fired me too. I actually liked that job. FML

#13958382
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32078) - you deserved it (3583)

On 11/24/2010 at 3:45am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I noticed that my wife changed her status on Facebook to "widow" and a lot of strange guys commented saying stuff like "Finally." Last I checked, I'm not dead. FML

#13352571
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41204) - you deserved it (2789)

On 10/07/2010 at 6:10am - love - by Alex - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I received a bouquet of flowers. I thought they might be from my crush, so I excitedly opened the card. It was from my druggie ex-boyfriend, who apparently can't move on with his life even after three years. The contents of the card? "Baby, I got you like a habit, and I can't give you up". FML

#8250207
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21140) - you deserved it (3066)

On 02/14/2010 at 1:52pm - love - by RosesAreRed (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, some drunk dude broke into my house while my parents were out. Scared, I asked him what he wanted, his response was "cookies." FML

#7264308
184 comments

Today, my pet hedgehog thought it would be funny to roll around in the kitty litter. It was like washing a poopy cactus. FML

Today, I was on a long-haul plane journey home from my holiday. After 5 hours, I decided to stretch my arms whilst watching a movie. Little did I know that a little girl was approaching, running down the aisle as my arm stretched out. I accidentally clothes-lined a little 9 year old girl. FML

#7203649
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26511) - you deserved it (3508)

On 01/07/2010 at 7:25pm - misc - by James4929 (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend gave me my first compliment in months. Apparently my body spray makes me smell like a stripper. He then asked me if he could "park the beef bus in tuna town". FML

#6718371
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19635) - you deserved it (3714)

On 12/12/2009 at 2:28am - intimacy - by Laura_2118 (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was attending a drug-free lecture at school. The speaker said, "There are many ways to quit smoking. You can try patches, gum, or even quitting cold turkey. Any questions?" I raised my hand, and she called on me. I asked, "How does cold turkey help?" And then I realized. FML

#6683898
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7805) - you deserved it (34523)

On 12/09/2009 at 7:53pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I realized that the drunk-me deletes my texts, so the sober-me doesn't get mad. Well turns out, whatever the drunk-me said, caused me to lose my job, my girlfriend, and my coffee machine. FML

#6100010
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11892) - you deserved it (44950)

On 11/01/2009 at 11:35am - misc - by Joe (man) - United States (Wisconsin)



Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML
  • So, have you ordered it? Have you got it? No? Yes? Do you know any idea of what I'm talking about? OK, for the normal people, I'm talking about the new iPhone 6. Apparently, it came out today. I'm not…

Friday 19 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: