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barfcannon

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barfcannon

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barfcannonbarfcannon
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 21 December 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1451
  • Number of comments : 70
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About barfcannon : Hodor.

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barfcannon's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my mom, braiding my dad's pubic hair. I don't know what scarred me more; my mom braiding his pubic hair or the fact that his pubic hair is long enough to be braided. FML

#18479276
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48338) - you deserved it (3626)

On 12/10/2011 at 8:03pm - intimacy - by Joe (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I walked in on my mom, braiding my dad's pubic hair. I don't know what scarred me more; my mom braiding his pubic hair or the fact that his pubic hair is long enough to be braided. FML

#18479276
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48338) - you deserved it (3626)

On 12/10/2011 at 8:03pm - intimacy - by Joe (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I saw my neighbor's Christmas tree they had put up on their porch, with decorative presents under it. Being that my neighbors hate me, I figured I would take a present to piss them off. While walking back home with the present, I opened it. Inside it read "I knew you would, douche bag." FML

#18464488
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8186) - you deserved it (72878)

On 12/08/2011 at 10:35pm - misc - by lebato97 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was heading to the beach with my mom following. I went through a yellow light and got a call from her complaining that I had left her. So, I made it a point to stop at the next yellow light. She rear-ended me. FML

Today, I was almost out of conditioner, despite having just bought some. Apparently, my boyfriend has been using it to condition his pubes. He thinks doing this will make me want to give him more blowjobs. FML

#18123104
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29294) - you deserved it (4891)

On 10/31/2011 at 7:29pm - intimacy - by silkysmooth (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my dad walked in on me and my girlfriend having sex. His only reaction was to mutter, "Put some back into it, son." before awkwardly sidling out. FML

#18087484
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32304) - you deserved it (7966)

On 10/27/2011 at 8:22am - intimacy - by ifeeldirty (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up after having a wet dream about Marge Simpson. I really need to get laid. FML

#17960202
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33747) - you deserved it (8219)

On 10/11/2011 at 3:06pm - intimacy - by margelover (man) - Denmark (Nordjylland)

Today, I was giving an anti-drugs speech to a group of ninth graders. I got onto the topic of trafficking from problem countries and asked a student to point out Mexico City on a map. He hesitated a few seconds before pointing at Canada. What the hell has the education system come to? FML

#17874852
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29787) - you deserved it (2933)

On 09/30/2011 at 10:55pm - kids - by jesus christ - United States

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

#17727595
396 comments

I agree, your life sucks (85579) - you deserved it (13130)

On 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by IbetIgotAIDS (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I had diarrhea at work. While trying to be subtle about the noises, the woman in the stall next to me called me by name and asked if I was having trouble. FML

#17066574
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32262) - you deserved it (2770)

On 07/11/2011 at 1:42pm - work - by Username - United States

Today, I looked out my window to see the sunset, but instead I see my neighbor dancing with strobe lights on and music blasting. He was by himself and had absolutely nothing on. FML

#16978964
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28888) - you deserved it (3810)

On 07/04/2011 at 10:38pm - intimacy - by danam - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I learned the hard way that yes, a fork can get stuck in your braces. FML

#16601397
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28824) - you deserved it (15395)

On 06/10/2011 at 9:32pm - health - by 8sq (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was in the elevator with my boss, when I let rip the vilest, most horrifying fart of my life as we left the first floor. We stood in silence as the elevator slowly ascended to the 21st floor, leaving us to marinate in the fumes. FML

#16516164
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16639) - you deserved it (41469)

On 06/05/2011 at 4:45pm - misc - by - United States

Today, I learned that when I leave skid marks in the toilet my wife uses my toothbrush to remove them. FML

#15598918
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33515) - you deserved it (45183)

On 04/02/2011 at 1:03am - misc - by Toothy (man) - United States (California)

Today, my cat died while walking around the kitchen. He had a heart attack when the toaster popped out two slices of bread. FML

#14753781
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49094) - you deserved it (3998) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/29/2011 at 3:09am - animals - by Anonymous - France



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