barfcannon

Search for a member

Offline (the 08/23/2015 at 10:57pm)

barfcannon

22Fucked!

barfcannonbarfcannon
  • Town/Country : London, Canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 21 December 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3835
  • Number of comments : 86
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About barfcannon : I am into mythology, surrealism, geometry, home décor, winter, animals, yoga and art + art history.

Some of my more mainstream interests are Harry Potter, Family Guy, Adventure Time, Game of Thrones, the first 10 seasons of The Simpsons and freaking sweet puns.

Also I always thought I was a practical sort of person but seeing basically all my interests listed out confirms everyone else's opinions that I'm a huge flaky dreamer.

All my friends moved out of my city after college so I'm in need of more friends in my life so send me a message! I swear I'm not as pretentious as my interests make me sound!

barfcannon's page activity

Visits<b>DevilsJizz</b> - the 11/04/2016 at 11:52pm<b>AlphaPrince13</b> - the 09/05/2016 at 11:56pm<b>SpaceToast</b> - the 09/02/2016 at 1:29am<b>panda900</b> - the 08/07/2016 at 9:26pm<b>SouL_WraitH</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 3:42pm<b>Standupmast3r</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 2:33pm<b>Steve95401</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 8:52am<b>cmchappy</b> - the 11/06/2015 at 5:03pm<b>beeferjay</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 1:55am<b>PresAgent</b> - the 10/14/2015 at 4:19am<b>LittleAlice92</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 8:53pm<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 09/26/2015 at 6:32am<b>NotRussian</b> - the 09/14/2015 at 1:09am<b>AChaoticFray</b> - the 09/13/2015 at 5:20pm<b>UserOfTheMind</b> - the 09/11/2015 at 12:33am<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 10:22pm<b>360momkeycrash</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 1:49am<b>Xx3rdBASSxX</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 12:26am

Fucked!<b>SpaceToast</b> - the 09/02/2016 at 7:30am<b>Steve95401</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 2:53pm<b>beeferjay</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 2:16am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 9:53am<b>Codezlol</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 9:56pm<b>int15</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 9:26pm<b>elusiveshame</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 7:47pm<b>Mukuro</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 11:47pm<b>jacky75</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 7:22am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 4:42am<b>cdncw</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 5:02pm<b>pks2014</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 2:41am<b>RA91</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 8:52am<b>SlowDownImaNoob</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 1:42pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 4:11am<b>joshtapp</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 3:29am<b>AirBusDriver</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 12:34am<b>brittaaany_93</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 8:10am

barfcannon's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of barfcannon's badges

barfcannon's favorite FMLs

Today, my 16-year-old son convinced my 14-year-old daughter that she wasn't allowed to use the ladies bathroom at the shopping centre, because she wasn't wearing a dress like the girl on the sign. He told her girls in pants always used the other one. She believed him. This is my legacy. FML

by badparent / 04/08/2013 at 12:26am / Australia (Queensland) / Kids

Today, I walked in on my husband eating cat food out of the cat bowl dressed in a cat costume. FML

by confusedcatlover / 04/06/2013 at 7:42am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was eating out with a group of friends and my boyfriend. During the meal, I accidentally took a sip from my male friend's glass. My boyfriend pointed and said, "Babe, you took his drink." My friend responded by putting his arm round me and saying, "Whatever, I took her virginity." FML

by everyoneheard / 03/28/2013 at 11:11am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy

Today, my parents asked me if I was sexually active. My grandma then screamed from upstairs, "She's not even physically active!" FML

by Susan / 03/18/2013 at 4:59am / Ireland / Intimacy

Today, I was dancing with an incredibly sexy man at a club. He was grinding on me when he leaned over and said, "If I was straight, I would make you my queen." FML

by noooooooo / 03/17/2013 at 8:10pm / United States (North Carolina) / Love

Today, my wife packed my lunch. Inside of my lunchbox was a photo of her eating my sandwiches. FML

by Anonymous / 03/01/2013 at 2:18am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I gave birth to my daughter in a hospital corridor. The nurse who took me to my room afterward tried to comfort me by saying there've been worse incidents; she said that two years ago, a lady gave birth in the parking lot. That was me too. FML

by laprochainefoisjerestealamaison / 02/25/2013 at 2:47pm / France (Languedoc-Roussillon) / Health

Today, my brother was arrested for starting a fistfight at a funeral. He didn't even know the deceased; he's just been crashing funerals recently, hoping to hook up with mourners. I'm not sure who's more pathetic: him for doing such a thing, or me for bailing his fucking dumb arse out of jail. FML

by an idiot / 02/16/2013 at 1:03pm / Australia / Money

Today, my brother was arrested for starting a fistfight at a funeral. He didn't even know the deceased; he's just been crashing funerals recently, hoping to hook up with mourners. I'm not sure who's more pathetic: him for doing such a thing, or me for bailing his fucking dumb arse out of jail. FML

by an idiot / 02/16/2013 at 1:03pm / Australia / Money

Today, I walked into my mother's house to find that she had knitted clothes for some of the household appliances. The toaster was wearing a dress. FML

by anon / 01/13/2013 at 10:00pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, after sharing my first night in bed with my boyfriend, I woke up early, and decided to rouse him with some surprise oral. It didn't go so well; he woke up screaming and gasped, "OH MY GOD! I thought you were my cat!" before telling me to continue. FML

by anonymaiacciu / 12/21/2012 at 8:16pm / France / Intimacy

Today, I woke up to find my best friend lying down and unresponsive. Frightened, I tapped on the glass. He got scared and started swimming again. My best friend is a fish. FML

by Anonymous / 12/10/2012 at 5:40pm / Sweden (Vastmanlands Lan) / Animals

Today, I told a girl that she had very pretty eyes. I then had to rinse pepper spray from my own. FML

by Anonymous / 09/05/2012 at 9:34pm / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, my son, who seems to think that he is a "gangsta" despite being a white boy from the suburbs, cried because I accidentally burned his grilled cheese. He's 28. FML

by Anonymous / 08/28/2012 at 12:29am / Canada (Quebec) / Kids

Today, I worked overtime with three guys who never shut up about partying and getting laid. When I finally escaped the testosterone and got home, the first thing I heard was my grandpa telling my dad all about how he once fisted a girl to orgasm. FML

by what the FUCK / 08/15/2012 at 6:52pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy