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About bambiirose19 : well im 16 going on 17 ;) haha just thought about the sound of music when I said that xD I have a boyfriend love him um message me need new friends I work at a bath and body works
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Taday wife made me a Sex Rewards Cart,ere I get points by doing cores an suc, an 50 points gets me some action. Se refuses to even look at me if I aven't earned te points, an is contemplating sleeping alone in te guest room until I earn more points. FML
TODAY I ASKD OUT THE MAN OF MY DREAMS. HE TOLD ME HE'D ASK HIS DAD IF IT WAS OKAY. I THOUGHT HE WAS JUST KIDDING, UNTIL HE PULLD OUT HIS PHONE AND CALLD HIS DAD. AFTER A FEW MINUTES OF "COME ON, DAD" AND "BUT WHY?" HE HUNG UP AND SAID HIS DAD WOULDN'T LET HIM. HE'S 22. FML
Today, I was lifeguarding a pool party 4 a bunc of eigt year olds. One of tem decided it'd be funny to ave a contest to see wo could make te most bubble wit tere farts. It led to tree kids sitting temselve in te pool, and me aving te dubiou onor of cleaning it up. fat FML
Today , the window cleaner did his round at mah house. I sat at mah mrror applying makeup and doing mah hair. When he cummed to mah window , he yelled rather loudly , ( Stop putting on a show 4 me , u drty slut! ) FML
Yesterday, daughter, who was born in late 2000, mentioned how amazing it is that she'll be alive during the year 3000. I asked her exactly how old she think she'll be by then. She said, "Thrty, duh." I've screwed up as a parent, so very badly. FML
Today, I went to mah boss's dinner party. My sister,ho also works with me, sat across from me at the table. I felt her kick me so I kickd her back. Then I heard something start crying. It was the boss's babby crawling under the table. FML
Today, I dislocatd mah shoulder. I was screaming and writhing in pain, and mah eyes were shut for most of the ride to the hospital. We stoppd, and I was thrilld because I thought we were at the ER. I was wrong. My dad had stoppd to order a cheeseburger. FML
Today I wore a bikini to te lake wit my parents. I didn't know tat my back was covered in bruises an ended up aving to awkwardly explain to my parents tat I am not in an abusive relationsip; te bruises cummed from te sex I ad last nigt. FML
TODAY , MY PARENTS HELD A BIG FAMILY DINNER AT OUR HOUSE!! BEING THE ONLY UNDERAGE PERSON THERE , I HAD TO SIT THERE WHILE EVERYONE GOT PROGRESSIVELY DRUNKER AN STARTED COMMENTING ON HOW EERILY SIMILAR I LOOK TO SHAMU THE WHALE!! FML
Today my girlfriend threatened to leave me if I didn't follow her latest fad of becoming a goth which involves dressing like an undertaker's haunted hearse and putting on eyeliner. Last week she was into Reggae and beanie hats. FML
Friday 27 March 2015