Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

baldfatman

Search for a member

baldfatman

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3092
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

baldfatman's page activity

Visits<b>wolfgold2</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 9:35pm<b>No_tag</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 6:25am<b>Kaitlin810</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 9:12pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:17pm<b>rachelhuggo</b> - the 05/02/2009 at 8:15pm<b>username666</b> - the 04/30/2009 at 10:57pm<b>Burdie22</b> - the 04/22/2009 at 4:48pm<b>ihaveaidz</b> - the 04/12/2009 at 9:52pm<b>xMooMoox</b> - the 03/31/2009 at 3:53pm

baldfatman's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

baldfatman's favorite FMLs

Today, my friend and I decided to get bikini waxes. Afterwards, the women who did the waxing told my friend it was $30 for her wax. Then, in front of the whole salon, the women points at me and says, "You! You so hairy- $35!". FML

#3669971
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55011) - you deserved it (8426)

On 07/11/2009 at 4:11pm - health - by waxinghorror (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I thought I saw a woodchuck far out in my yard. I wanted to take a cool picture of it so I slowly crept closer and closer to it. I spent half an hour sneaking up on a log. FML

#2900113
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16263) - you deserved it (48352)

On 06/14/2009 at 11:37pm - misc - by thelarkscaw (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was helping an old man find a pair of shoes. I told him about a particularly comfortable pair but had to inform him that they only came in black or white. Hearing this, the old man grabbed me around the neck and began to beat me in the head with our display shoe. He wanted brown. FML

#2821458
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68919) - you deserved it (3702)

On 06/12/2009 at 1:33am - work - by Shoes (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I had to give a presentation about Adolf Hitler. I wanted to point out he was a very good speaker, and could incite a crowd. Instead, what came out was 'Hitler's oral skills made everyone go wild with excitement" FML

#2508726
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36063) - you deserved it (61314)

On 06/01/2009 at 7:12pm - misc - by Cail (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I saw that Pixar had put out a teaser trailer for Toy Story 3. I got so excited to watch it that had to go lay in bed for a few minutes in order to calm myself down. I'm 19 years old. FML

#2406787
286 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20443) - you deserved it (44626)

On 05/29/2009 at 5:08pm - misc - by LALALALA (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was about to lose my virginity with my girlfriend of 2 years, when I got an urgent phone call from my 9-year-old sister, telling me I had to come home immediately. My grandma fell off the toilet and got stuck between the bowl and the wall. I'm not making this up. FML

#1604682
310 comments

I agree, your life sucks (261251) - you deserved it (17227)

On 05/03/2009 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend stopped making out with me to watch a thirty minute infomercial on the Topsy-Turvy upside down tomato planter. FML

#1221446
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54500) - you deserved it (6479)

On 04/22/2009 at 1:02pm - love - by T-Pain (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I drove past a firehouse that had volunteer firemen taking collections. I take out a $20 and start to roll the window down when I remember my window was broken. I ended up driving by, holding the $20 against the window, staring at the fireman. Now the fireman thinks I was taunting him. FML

#1076233
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45815) - you deserved it (15193)

On 04/18/2009 at 1:09am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was petting my cat when my new mood ring turned bright purple. I checked the piece of paper that came with the ring and saw that purple meant I was feeling "hot, sexy, and passionate." According to my ring, I'm hot for my cat. FML

#1070820
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41298) - you deserved it (15253)

On 04/17/2009 at 10:32pm - intimacy - by shutupandsmile18 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was talking to my mom. During the conversation she asked me, "Does he take his leg off when you guys are having sex?" Referring to the guy I've been seeing who has a prosthetic leg. My dad then asked, "Does he beat you with it too if you've been naughty?" FML

#209116
320 comments

I agree, your life sucks (232588) - you deserved it (30946)

On 03/04/2009 at 6:07pm - intimacy - by Girl123999 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to clean my room, find a job and ask a girl on a date. I ended up playing video games online. FML

#1399
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8686) - you deserved it (38711)

On 01/16/2009 at 6:19pm - misc - by Noname - Canada (British Columbia)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #2: In slow-moving hell
  • It was once a dream, now it’s come true. We’re at the place that was allocated months ago for preprogrammed, enforced holiday fun time. We’ve put on some cargo shorts, slipped on some of those…

Wednesday 13 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: