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bagofootball75

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bagofootball75

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  • Number of visits : 347
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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bagofootball75's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up naked next to my gay roommate after a night of drinking. Neither he nor I remember anything. FML

#20083352
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25150) - you deserved it (25514)

On 09/22/2012 at 10:06am - intimacy - by holyshitbatman - United States (Illinois)

Today, I collected my students' notes in class to check them. One girl, who is always drawing weird anime crap in her sketchbook, turned in just one piece of paper that read, "FUCK YOUR CLASS." FML

#20076781
320 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17675) - you deserved it (19278)

On 09/17/2012 at 8:21pm - work - by Mrs. Teacher (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML

#20068526
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44577) - you deserved it (3888)

On 09/12/2012 at 3:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my father bet me $200 that since my boyfriend is "such a stupid shit," he wouldn't be able to locate Paraguay on a map. I gladly accepted the bet. Not only did he not know where it is, he actually accused us of making the country up. FML

#20063309
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20039) - you deserved it (12382)

On 09/08/2012 at 3:16pm - misc - by dating a fucking idiot (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were talking about being super heroes. He said I could be "The Period" because I'm a bitch. FML

#20040696
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18633) - you deserved it (8156)

On 08/25/2012 at 8:47am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I walked in on my fifteen-year-old son and his friends attempting to set up a rudimentary meth lab in his bedroom. I'm not sure whether to be angrier that they simply tried this, or that they thought burning up baking soda would somehow produce methamphetamine. FML

#20017485
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23871) - you deserved it (2384)

On 08/12/2012 at 8:49pm - kids - by JAdams (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, after much debate, my husband convinced me to let his scumbag brother babysit our seven-year-old son while we went out to a restaurant. When we got home, we found him teaching our son how to pick the lock to our liquor cabinet. My husband is unapologetic. FML

#20014051
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20799) - you deserved it (3413)

On 08/10/2012 at 7:59pm - kids - by shira512 (woman) - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, I asked my husband if he knew what day it was. His answer was, "garbage day?" It's our six-year anniversary. FML

#19987123
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21468) - you deserved it (2988)

On 07/27/2012 at 10:10am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while working as a manager at a restaurant, the "All employees must wash hands" sign in the bathroom was stolen. Now my employees won't wash their hands because they "don't have to." FML

#19986926
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22647) - you deserved it (2166)

On 07/27/2012 at 5:25am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend. He won't go on a cruise with me in the gulf of Mexico, because he thinks we will crash into an iceberg like in Titanic. FML

#19950905
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23715) - you deserved it (3273)

On 07/17/2012 at 5:11pm - love - by Alliente - United States

Today, I was in traffic court trying to get out of a ticket. The judge called my defense "complete, unadulterated bullshit." FML

#19918441
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6967) - you deserved it (26852)

On 07/10/2012 at 11:39am - misc - by mustanggt (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I watched as my dad noticed a spider on the ceiling. Instead of getting a shoe, he pulled out a 9mm and shot it. I'm not sure if this is an epic win or a sign that my family is crazy. FML

#19903364
317 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29876) - you deserved it (3575)

On 07/07/2012 at 2:10am - misc - by kalikanna - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was T-boned at an intersection. In an ambulance. On the way to the hospital after being T-boned at an intersection. FML

#19873048
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36481) - you deserved it (1676)

On 06/30/2012 at 8:31pm - health - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, as part of my medical anatomy course, I had to give a presentation about an STD and the effects it has on women. The class was comprised almost entirely of girls. I become extremely anxious and accidentally stated "Vaginas are smelly" as my opening statement. FML

#19637447
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13940) - you deserved it (24797)

On 05/17/2012 at 4:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, at a concert, I got into a fight with a man in a banana suit. FML

#19546385
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9689) - you deserved it (18152)

On 04/29/2012 at 5:45am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Manitoba)



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