About badluckross : Give me your fucks!
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badluckross's favorite FMLs
Today, my wife got her period. Every single time, she ends up asking me to go buy her some midol after a few days of trying to tough it out, so I decided to buy her some ahead of time. She reacted by yelling at me for treating her like a child and implying that she couldn't go buy it herself. FML
by unappreciated husband / 03/28/2014 at 5:43pm / United States (Washington) / Love
by Anonymous / 03/28/2014 at 4:30pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
by testacular / 03/25/2014 at 5:20pm / United Kingdom (Plymouth) / Intimacy
Today, fed up with my nerdy appearance, I got my hair shaved off, hoping for a Walter White kind of look. I didn't think it was too bad, but not even an hour later, I'd already been called a "fat Bruce Willis" and compared to a freshly circumcised penis. FML
by richard / 03/21/2014 at 12:10pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had the most intelligent conversation I've ever had with my boyfriend. He was getting really in-depth about subjects like biotechnology and gamma radiation. I soon realized he was only referring to the Incredible Hulk. FML
by cubs44fan / 03/04/2014 at 6:25pm / United States (Indiana) / Geek
by meandme / 03/04/2014 at 5:55pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids
by gaiakirkland / 02/15/2014 at 6:18am / Italy (Lombardia) / Health
Today, my girlfriend and I were quite drunk while we were fooling around on the couch, when I decided I wanted to lose my virginity to her. I was two thrusts in when she burst out laughing. Looking down, I realized I was between her cheeks and the couch cushion. I lost my virginity to her couch. FML
by Unknown / 02/07/2014 at 9:18am / United States (Iowa) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 02/06/2014 at 6:07pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, after trying for several days to change some details on the social security website, I got fed up and called them. I waited nearly two hours on hold, and when I finally got through, the guy on the other end just told me to reboot my computer and try again, then hung up on me. FML
by Anonymous / 01/14/2014 at 4:09pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at a baby shower with my wife. I went to go outside for some fresh air, but walked straight into their glass sliding door. Everyone stared at me. I smiled with embarrassment and walked back over to my wife, only to trip over my own feet and faceplant the floor. FML
by stillhurting / 01/05/2014 at 4:45pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Health
by Kayla_BlowPop / 01/03/2014 at 3:34am / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I again failed to convince my girlfriend that the $100 in our account is the minimum amount we have keep there to avoid being charged by the bank. We have a joint checking account, and the only way to take her off it is to close the account outright. FML
by BlindInTheDark / 10/09/2013 at 2:02pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Money
Today, I couldn't sleep due to an awful head cold, so I stayed home from work. Apparently, the local high school marching band practices in the park across the street at 9am. They're doing the Imperial March music from Star Wars. They suck. FML
by lostinspace / 09/04/2013 at 12:24pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
by still together / 08/28/2013 at 1:47pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love
- Today, while getting it on with my wife, I started to talk dirty to her. She started laughing. When… Today, my boyfriend gave me my first compliment in months. Apparently my body spray makes me smell… Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in…