Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

badassmf1234

Online | Search for a member

badassmf1234

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 7 December 1995 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6312
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

badassmf1234's page activity

Visits<b>starw0lf</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 6:01pm<b>Waspinator1998</b> - the 08/01/2013 at 3:24am<b>jojo69b</b> - the 07/01/2013 at 4:55am<b>roll_it_up</b> - the 06/25/2013 at 10:14pm<b>hippodamia</b> - the 06/25/2013 at 2:25pm<b>aliyyyyyah22</b> - the 06/25/2013 at 8:54am<b>bamagrl410</b> - the 06/25/2013 at 4:04am<b>Awesomeaxel</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 12:50pm<b>maemismile</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 11:57am<b>FMLIND33D</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 7:16am<b>Sawsaiuge</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 3:10am<b>Phoebe_Buffay</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 1:36am<b>Dennisse_47</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 1:27am<b>chrisbot5555</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 1:18am<b>eyesak</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 1:15am<b>bmackdaddy12</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 12:50am<b>blackphoenix0010</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 12:45am<b>CaptMurdock</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 12:26am

badassmf1234's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of badassmf1234's badges

badassmf1234's favorite FMLs

Today, my car keys are in my house and my house keys are in my car, and I'm in neither. FML

#20943997
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47010) - you deserved it (8455)

On 11/03/2013 at 3:18pm - misc - by Argh (man) - France (Poitou-Charentes)

Today, some kid asked me if I was Mexican. After I explained to him that I was actually Venezuelan, he simply snorted and said, "That's the same f*cking thing. If you speak Spanish then you're Mexican." FML

#20939700
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46723) - you deserved it (5313)

On 10/30/2013 at 10:59pm - misc - by Rinelric1998 (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, when I locked my newly repaired bike up, I carefully took the new rear light off it so that nobody could steal said light. Somebody stole my bike. At least I have a red light to play with. FML

#20936443
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36539) - you deserved it (3491)

On 10/28/2013 at 2:31am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicester)

Today, my girlfriend asked me if I could love anything more than her, and if so, what. I guess "bacon" was the wrong answer. FML

#20936378
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27733) - you deserved it (41067)

On 10/28/2013 at 12:58am - love - by BaconLover - Japan

Today, I'm severely sunburned and can barely walk properly. My boyfriend keeps telling his friends that it's because of "how hard he gave it to me last night". FML

#20936372
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52244) - you deserved it (9197)

On 10/28/2013 at 12:51am - intimacy - by snowwhite (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was assigned to fill in for a French teacher who was out sick. I had asked the class to name some French-speaking countries. I called on one girl and she replied, "Uh, Europe. That's, like, the only other one, right?" Nobody disagreed. I'm filling in for the rest of the month. FML

#20929522
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40970) - you deserved it (2586)

On 10/21/2013 at 9:40pm - work - by :| - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mom made fun of me because I'm 16 and have never had a boyfriend, then bragged that at my age she was already pregnant with me. FML

#20918137
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55556) - you deserved it (3227)

On 10/12/2013 at 9:59pm - misc - by roundtherose - United States (Alaska)

Today, my son's lemonade stand was robbed by a senior citizen. FML

#20908703
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46815) - you deserved it (2949)

On 10/05/2013 at 6:25pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, my online order arrived earlier than I expected. I opened it to find some kind of anal sex toy. Whoever this is for is going to be disappointed when they get my 3DS game. FML

#20894309
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38298) - you deserved it (2621)

On 09/24/2013 at 12:16pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I texted my girlfriend a long heartfelt loving message for our 2-year anniversary. Her reply was just "K." FML

#20892986
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46571) - you deserved it (6053)

On 09/23/2013 at 1:53pm - love - by User (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when his condom came off inside of me. We couldn't get it out, so I had to tell my mom, who didn't know we were sexually active, and then go to the ER. After an unsuccessful visit, we came home only to find the condom in my sheets. FML

#20889434
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50984) - you deserved it (34294)

On 09/20/2013 at 9:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to show my daughter where the USA is on a map. She's 17, and we live in the USA. FML

#20889279
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42086) - you deserved it (9733)

On 09/20/2013 at 6:45pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my daughter told me she is pregnant. The father is the foreign exchange student who just moved back to Germany. FML

#20887524
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51043) - you deserved it (4960)

On 09/19/2013 at 6:30am - kids - by monkey (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my English teacher handed back my creative story assignment with a 74% on it. Apparently, she docked 10% because I had an unrealistic, overly dramatic plot line. That plot line was based on my life. FML

#20887417
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43187) - you deserved it (3773)

On 09/19/2013 at 2:15am - work - by Sua - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I realized I pay $160/month to get two texts a day. One from my bank telling me how much I have, one for my credit card telling me how much I owe. FML



FML's blog

  • On FML, it's Halloween every day
  • As you know, we never pass up the chance to open up a light beer and plunge into the depths of the FML archive to come up with some sort of theme. Most holidays, national or otherwise, are pretty well represented.…

Friday 31 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: