Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

badassmf1234

Online | Search for a member

badassmf1234

13Fucked!

badassmf1234badassmf1234
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 7 December 1995 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 13762
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About badassmf1234 : Engaged to the most amazing girl in the world. I love my Emily. Work in the construction field. Hoping to finish school to become a draftsman. I snowmobile in the winter and mountain bike in the summer. Love being by the lake. Canadian beer is the best! It takes six beers to get piss drunk, but you it takes nine! Suckers

badassmf1234's page activity

Visits<b>Tenker</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 6:47pm<b>Arnoud</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 9:32am<b>dno79</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 9:05am<b>phoneaddict13</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 8:17am<b>SummerDuck</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 6:11pm<b>jdw17</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 8:50pm<b>ExpectNeo</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 5:00pm<b>LyonDetreny</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 4:44am<b>Coachjoost79</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 12:10am<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 10:27am<b>mblaxer36</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 4:11pm<b>Frowny</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 7:20am<b>CharlieFishingUK</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 6:02am<b>IamBlackJesus</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 3:46am<b>Taymoo1515</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 7:48am<b>MozillaHostile</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 5:48am<b>Tiaxlnr</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 1:58am<b>stinkysock</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 3:33pm

Fucked!<b>Tiaxlnr</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 7:58am<b>stinkysock</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 9:30pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 10/05/2015 at 10:42pm<b>OwlsMakeBowels</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 6:34am<b>HowSmartOfYou</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 3:45am<b>the_aspect</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 3:30pm<b>Mas8394z</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 4:40am<b>toshaleigh</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 10:11pm<b>ImagineCrazy</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 2:31am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 4:41am<b>sarah5745</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 11:38pm<b>saraitkddh</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 4:27pm

badassmf1234's FML badges

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of badassmf1234's badges

badassmf1234's favorite FMLs

Today, at our wedding, instead of saying "I do", my fiancé paused before saying, "I can't do this", stepped down from the altar and proposed to my maid of honor. When she obviously refused, he ran from the venue bawling. He's not returning my calls. FML

#21482431
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36045) - you deserved it (2315)

On 10/21/2015 at 12:46am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had to try to convince my roommate that, yes, you do need to use dish soap when you hand wash dishes because of bacteria in old food. She still won't believe me, insisting that, "there's no such thing as bacteria in food". FML

#21482383
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24056) - you deserved it (1503)

On 10/20/2015 at 10:26pm - misc - by seriously_CAT -

Today, I leaned over my sleeping girlfriend, kissed her cheek and told her I love her. She punched me in the ear. FML

#21482098
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23233) - you deserved it (3366)

On 10/20/2015 at 5:44am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I finally found out why my new co-worker has been shooting me dirty looks, being rude to me, and generally trying to avoid me. It's because I have blonde hair and blue eyes, and she thinks people like me are Nazis. FML

#21481034
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26278) - you deserved it (1607)

On 10/17/2015 at 8:29am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend about the importance of foreplay, and that attempting to get me "in the mood" by whipping his cock out and air humping was roughly equivalent to throwing a dry teabag at me and claiming he made a cup of tea. FML

#21480731
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27433) - you deserved it (2725)

On 10/16/2015 at 11:05am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, I walked into the restroom at work to see my boss standing at the urinal, pissing like a toddler. He had his pants around his ankles, ass fully exposed. Now I'm never going to be able to take anything he says seriously. FML

#21480714
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22583) - you deserved it (1665)

On 10/16/2015 at 9:31am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my husband finally admitted that he squandered the last three months of my share of the rent on booze. He then blamed me, demanded more money, asked for a divorce, and stormed out. When he returned he asked, "How am I the bad guy?" FML

#21480543
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26756) - you deserved it (2098)

On 10/15/2015 at 8:57pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my boyfriend flamboyantly proposed to me in a packed restaurant. I promptly had a panic attack and fainted in front of at least fifty people and a full mariachi band. FML

#21480476
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23525) - you deserved it (2123)

On 10/15/2015 at 5:47pm - misc - by lacucarcha (woman) - United Kingdom (Telford and Wrekin)

Today, I was walking through school when I noticed an advertisement for school picture retakes. It read, "Bad hair day?" Underneath was my picture. That's my normal hair. FML

Today, I was dumped by my girlfriend because she wanted to be with a man who has an income and a stable career. We are seniors in college and I accepted a really good job offer which I start once I graduate, which she knows about. She dumped me for a drug dealer. FML

#21480268
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29228) - you deserved it (2040)

On 10/15/2015 at 12:43am - misc - by WTF (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I got into a minor argument with my fiancé. Deciding it wasn't worth fighting over, I shrugged and said, "Really, what are we even doing this for?" To which he replied, "Honestly, I don't know. I haven't loved you in years… Oh, you meant about the fight." And just like that, I'm now single. FML

#21479918
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31919) - you deserved it (2491)

On 10/14/2015 at 8:41am - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got yelled at in a grocery store by a customer who recognized me from the pizza place where I work. Apparently, I forgot mushrooms on her pizza earlier this afternoon. I had the day off, but thanks for the verbal lashing, lady. FML

#21479832
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24195) - you deserved it (1761)

On 10/14/2015 at 1:40am - work - by mushroomless - United States (Wyoming)

Today, my boyfriend told me that he doesn't know why I think deepthroating is so uncomfortable. To prove his point, he grabbed my dildo and effortlessly slid it down his throat. FML

#21479432
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31635) - you deserved it (5615)

On 10/13/2015 at 3:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my best friend told me how his batshit insane girlfriend keeps questioning his sexuality and thinks we're screwing behind her back. He's so desperate for a relationship that he's decided to stop hanging out with me. Goodbye 7 years of friendship. FML

#21479008
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28136) - you deserved it (1653)

On 10/12/2015 at 10:29am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I went to the hospital for a scan. The tech went wide-eyed and stared at his screen in horror before realizing I could see him. He wouldn't tell me what he saw, apparently only my doctor is allowed to do that. So now I have to wait for god knows how long to get my results back. FML

#21478782
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28185) - you deserved it (1529)

On 10/11/2015 at 10:02pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: