Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

badassmf1234

Offline (2 hours ago) | Search for a member

badassmf1234

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 7 December 1995 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6447
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

badassmf1234's page activity

Visits<b>starw0lf</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 6:01pm<b>Waspinator1998</b> - the 08/01/2013 at 3:24am<b>jojo69b</b> - the 07/01/2013 at 4:55am<b>roll_it_up</b> - the 06/25/2013 at 10:14pm<b>hippodamia</b> - the 06/25/2013 at 2:25pm<b>aliyyyyyah22</b> - the 06/25/2013 at 8:54am<b>bamagrl410</b> - the 06/25/2013 at 4:04am<b>Awesomeaxel</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 12:50pm<b>maemismile</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 11:57am<b>FMLIND33D</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 7:16am<b>Sawsaiuge</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 3:10am<b>Phoebe_Buffay</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 1:36am<b>Dennisse_47</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 1:27am<b>chrisbot5555</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 1:18am<b>eyesak</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 1:15am<b>bmackdaddy12</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 12:50am<b>blackphoenix0010</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 12:45am<b>CaptMurdock</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 12:26am

badassmf1234's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of badassmf1234's badges

badassmf1234's favorite FMLs

Today, my little sister decided the best way to cheat on a test is to take someone else's test, scratch through their name in pencil, and write her name underneath. She starts high school next semester. FML

#21272741
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32720) - you deserved it (2780)

On 10/07/2014 at 12:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out I'm allergic to condoms. Which would be great if my girlfriend wasn't allergic to birth control. FML

#21270163
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43181) - you deserved it (3649)

On 10/03/2014 at 3:04pm - health - by oncehipjr (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was flipping out because I couldn't find my wallet, and after several hours of cussing myself out, I went downstairs to make breakfast. I poured cereal into my bowl and my wallet flopped out with the Honey Nut Cheerios. I need to stop drinking. FML

#21267969
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22632) - you deserved it (33312)

On 09/29/2014 at 10:13pm - misc - by KasSmoke - United States (Texas)

Today, I went into an exam room to do a check-up on one of my patients. I told the little girl's mother that she needed her flu shots. When the girl heard this, she took an apple out of her pocket and threw it at me. FML

#21267077
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32133) - you deserved it (3551)

On 09/28/2014 at 3:26pm - health - by jazzie7719 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, a guy told me I "kind of look like a girl" if he looked at me from the right angle. Well, I am a girl, and this is the closest thing to a compliment that I've gotten in years. FML

Today, in astronomy class, a kid used Uranus in a hilarious innuendo. I was the only one who laughed. I also happen to be the teacher. FML

#21260699
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33528) - you deserved it (5693)

On 09/18/2014 at 3:20pm - misc - by immature - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, I went deep-sea fishing with my friends. I told them my new phone case is waterproof, and I showed them by pouring a bit of water on it. My friend decided to throw it in the water for a better example. The case didn't float. FML

#21258099
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41144) - you deserved it (6406)

On 09/14/2014 at 2:47pm - misc - by HiImAlfredo (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I got high for the first time. Apparently I called my vet and told him my goldfish was barking. I found out when he called me back later to make sure we were both okay. FML

#21258033
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31655) - you deserved it (18223)

On 09/14/2014 at 12:38pm - animals - by Anonymous - Ghana (Greater Accra)

Today, my girlfriend told me that the necklace I gave her wasn't a "unique enough gift." I spent two weeks making that necklace, link by link. FML

#21257946
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42900) - you deserved it (2754)

On 09/14/2014 at 8:53am - love - by NoConfusion (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend texted me saying, "I have some Durex and want your help" so I rushed to her house. She had meant to say "Duluxe". I had to help her paint her bedroom. FML

#21257403
89 comments

Today, I had to take my husband's laptop to University for an in-class exam. I opened the screen, and loud porn started to auto-play. The silence in the class was deafening as I tried to make it stop. FML

#21256842
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44910) - you deserved it (5582)

On 09/12/2014 at 9:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I was driving to the DMV to take a test, after getting some points removed from my license. On the way there, I got a speeding ticket and got my license suspended completely. FML

#21256258
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17266) - you deserved it (46496)

On 09/11/2014 at 11:44am - misc - by hockusa3 - United States (Maryland)

Today, I had to take bus to work, because yesterday my car was hit by a bus. While standing there, I noticed the driver kept looking back at me every now and then. As I went to get off, he looks at me again and says: "Sorry..." FML

#21252700
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44447) - you deserved it (2616)

On 09/05/2014 at 10:36pm - work - by crop circle galore - United States

Today, my girlfriend got up in the middle of sex saying, "You're taking too long, I'm gonna go make some popcorn." I asked her if she could get me some. She said no. FML

#21251846
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41665) - you deserved it (8288)

On 09/04/2014 at 3:32pm - intimacy - by candy man - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my husband asked our tax professional if we could file my profession as "Expert Dream Murderer." I'm a guidance counselor. FML

#21251173
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34219) - you deserved it (4527)

On 09/03/2014 at 2:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)



FML's blog

  • Cynthia's illustrated FML
  • TFIF indeed. It's time to kick off the suit and tie and forget about work. Some of us are going out for drinks with friends, others are going to enjoy some live music and some brave fools are going to keep fit…

Friday 28 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: