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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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babybarb

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babybarb
  • Town/Country : Las Vegas, Nevada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 18 November 1990 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 6164
  • Number of comments : 18
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

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babybarb's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on a date with my boyfriend. Suddenly he starts speaking gibberish. I ask what's wrong? He says, "I was just talking to my unicorn. He says you're pretty," and winks at me. What have we learned today? The person I like is a freak, and apparently unicorns are real. FML

#2829311 (408)

I agree, your life sucks (49150) - you deserved it (7835)

On 06/12/2009 at 12:49pm - love - by unicorn (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was helping an old man find a pair of shoes. I told him about a particularly comfortable pair but had to inform him that they only came in black or white. Hearing this, the old man grabbed me around the neck and began to beat me in the head with our display shoe. He wanted brown. FML

#2821458 (183)

I agree, your life sucks (57467) - you deserved it (2474)

On 06/12/2009 at 1:33am - work - by Shoes (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I had my first appearance in a court as an attorney. I called the prosecution the prostitution. FML

#2796637 (211)

I agree, your life sucks (65237) - you deserved it (16026)

On 06/11/2009 at 7:52am - work - by apav (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I got hypnotized at my school's variety show. Apparently, when asked to do something I enjoy doing, I began to violently hump the floor. FML

#2722142 (287)

I agree, your life sucks (69766) - you deserved it (14572)

On 06/08/2009 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by OhGeez (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I had my first job interview and didn't have much of an appetite because of the nerves. So I grabbed a brownie that my roommate had left in the fridge and ate it on the train ride in to the city. About 20 minutes into my interview I was so stoned I couldn't speak. FML

#1550190 (368)

I agree, your life sucks (111552) - you deserved it (26056)

On 05/02/2009 at 2:28am - work - by Dunzo15 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I got back my math test. Instead of taking the time to mark the mistakes, my professor just circled the bottom half of the page and wrote "OMG." FML

#853708 (244)

I agree, your life sucks (174) - you deserved it (18647)

On 04/07/2009 at 2:37pm - work - by aviators (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my son said, "Mommy, sometimes my pee-pee goes up like a stick." I replied, "Well, honey, that's normal and okay." I then asked when it happens, to which he said, "Well, sometimes when watching Scooby Doo and Shaggy comes out dressed in lady clothes." FML

#481631 (523)

I agree, your life sucks (249118) - you deserved it (34308)

On 03/20/2009 at 12:15am - kids - by ScoobieDoo (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I forgot to do my French homework, but since it was an online worksheet, I told my teacher my internet wasn't working. I told her with an e-mail. FML

#161178 (978)

I agree, your life sucks (42628) - you deserved it (500320)

On 02/28/2009 at 2:07pm - misc - by ihavepinkbackpac (woman) - United States (California)