Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

aznguy13

Search for a member

aznguy13

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 356
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About aznguy13 : Hey

aznguy13's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

aznguy13's favorite FMLs

Today, on my metro ride home, I sat next to a woman who thought it was appropriate to continually scratch at her scalp and then eat her 'scalp pickings'. When I looked over at her hair, I could see scabs clumped together from her previous scratching sessions. FML

Today, I was at work and I had to take a dump. Since I was the only person in the bathroom, I started singing, "I'm taking a poopy-poop poop poop poop." I was not the only person in the bathroom. FML

#7050962
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8089) - you deserved it (56942)

On 12/31/2009 at 3:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my 6 year old daughter saw a man in a wheelchair who's leg had been amputated. She walks up to him and says, "What happened?". He answers kindly that he's a war veteran. She then responds, "Well then you deserve to get your leg blown off. You shouldn't be killing people." FML

#2030761
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (93240) - you deserved it (22301)

On 05/17/2009 at 9:19pm - kids - by embarrassedmom (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I got on an elevator with a woman and her child. I was the first one on. When she stepped on, the capacity alarm went off. As she left she told her daughter that's why fat people shouldn't be allowed in public. I'm 145 lbs. She was twice my size. I got called fat by a hippopotamus. FML

#721846
311 comments

I agree, your life sucks (174725) - you deserved it (11740)

On 03/31/2009 at 10:17am - health - by warp_routine (woman) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I got on an elevator with a woman and her child. I was the first one on. When she stepped on, the capacity alarm went off. As she left she told her daughter that's why fat people shouldn't be allowed in public. I'm 145 lbs. She was twice my size. I got called fat by a hippopotamus. FML

#721846
311 comments

I agree, your life sucks (174725) - you deserved it (11740)

On 03/31/2009 at 10:17am - health - by warp_routine (woman) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I crapped in my pants and had to wait an hour of commuting till I could clean it up. What a sight and smell it was on the subway. Thank God I had sunglasses to wear. FML

#2443
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9684) - you deserved it (24858)

On 01/24/2009 at 1:56pm - love - by screwed - Chile (Region Metropolitana)

Today, I got bored and decided to try World Of Warcraft. FML

#2172
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13687) - you deserved it (25431)

On 01/22/2009 at 10:14am - misc - by insearch4i - United States (Arizona)

Today, I decided to get a Blizzard from Dairy Queen. As bent down to put my pen away, my Blizzard somehow defied the laws of gravity and fell on me. FML

#2150
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15813) - you deserved it (3549)

On 01/22/2009 at 6:10am - love - by sadtimes - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)

Today, I called up my ex girlfriend to ask her if I could come round hers to get my pyjamas back. She replied: “I’m keeping them just in case...”- “In case of what?”- “In case I want to dress up like an asshole”. FML

#1859
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8337) - you deserved it (23579)

On 01/20/2009 at 9:01am - love - by dude - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was told that my mom and her new husband have named my new born brother "Titan". FML

#1172
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22022) - you deserved it (1863)

On 01/14/2009 at 10:49pm - misc - by isthisajoke - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Jim Trim's Illustrated FML
  • Action stations! I'm back from my holiday, I've got some sort of weirdly uneven tan and I already want to go back to the beach to bum about and finish off my colouring book. But I can't. I'm still…

Friday 29 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: