azhein

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azhein

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 5 January 1989 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3448
  • Number of comments : 175
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

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azhein's page activity

Visits<b>n_a_v_y</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 5:44am<b>lexivance</b> - the 04/23/2016 at 10:56pm<b>MoeLester123</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 10:15pm<b>FuckThisLogin</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 10:30am<b>Envy22</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 5:12pm<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 12:20am<b>sulvan182</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 5:56pm<b>kittykat1501</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 9:33pm<b>DemHaxBro</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 11:11am<b>Carrotop12</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 7:51pm<b>fk18</b> - the 02/05/2015 at 1:20am<b>finegirl1</b> - the 01/09/2015 at 6:48pm<b>clairesucks</b> - the 01/07/2015 at 9:26am<b>GEFStryker</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 7:47am<b>FoTheWin</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 10:49pm<b>bigsexy85</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 11:41pm<b>BlazeArmy</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 2:09am<b>blcusername</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 11:32am

azhein's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

azhein's favorite FMLs

Today, I rescheduled my doctor's appointment for a tetanus shot to go camping with my friends. While running on a path at the camp site, I stepped on a rusty nail that went right through my shoe and into my foot. Maybe I should have kept my appointment. FML

by terpity12 / 08/07/2009 at 3:39pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was picking my daughter up at day care. She was outside playing kick ball. A red ball rolls over to me, and trying to impress the kids, I kicked it over the slide. I turn around to see three crying six year olds. It was their hamster ball. FML

by Anonymous / 08/05/2009 at 1:10pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. It was just me and her. Things began to get heated, and we started doing it on the living room couch. Near the end of it I decided to whisper in her ear, "Who's your daddy?" I hear behind me, "I am." FML

by unbelievable208 / 08/05/2009 at 1:28am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, while walking through the park, a little boy came running up to me and hit me in the nuts with a stick. I fell on the ground and looked up just in time to see his mom giving him the thumbs up with a smile on her face. FML

by bbbkingsey / 07/23/2009 at 3:10am / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, I woke up screaming. Why? Well, I was complaining to my dad yesterday about how I always hit the snooze button and just roll over when my alarm goes off, and how that results in me being late for morning classes. My dad thought he'd help out by placing a mousetrap on the snooze button. FML

by emperor / 07/21/2009 at 1:38am / Bangladesh (Dhaka) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was using a public bathroom when a woman backs in, pulls down her pants, and sits on my lap. Needless to say she didn't even notice I was there until I hyperventilated. FML

by yourmom / 06/16/2009 at 12:06am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to use my mentor's advice. I told her I had been having some trouble controlling my anger, she told me to throw rocks at trees. I threw a rock at a tree, very hard. It bounced back hit me above the eye. I'm still pissed as shit. FML

by untitledentity / 05/24/2009 at 12:03pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at my 3 year-old niece's birthday party. I was swinging on their swing set when she walked directly into my path. I tried to jump off the swing, but I could not stop myself in time. I ended up kicking her in the face and giving her a black eye. Happy birthday! FML

by BrandNewKadillak / 04/29/2009 at 8:14pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, I told my morbidly obese teacher that he had mustard on his chin. He tried to wipe it off and I said without thinking "No, your other chin." FML

by anonymous / 04/21/2009 at 1:42am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was having a horrible day. I was laying on the couch, crying, when my dog came up on the couch to console me. I was thinking about how great it was to have a dog, because they're there for you when no one else is. As I was sobbing, I heard something. My dog farted into my mouth. Twice. FML

by BadBreath / 04/08/2009 at 11:43pm / United States (Minnesota) / Animals

Today, my dad and I were at the grocery store buying toilet paper. As we walk out I see these two attractive guys that I know. My dad gets that I think they're cute, so he shouts "Hey babe, how's your stomach feeling now? Will this be enough for you?" They walk away laughing. FML

by Krissy. / 03/31/2009 at 3:04am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, the girl I've had a crush on forever asked me why the pin on my Letterman jacket had two guys doing it. I told her it was for participating in a wrestling tournament. And she responded, "Oh I thought you were finally coming out of the closet!" FML

by Seanzy / 03/30/2009 at 4:16pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, my cat was in the bathroom with me. I was getting undressed to get into the shower. My cat looked at me after I'd undressed and then threw up all over the rug. FML

by Noname / 03/12/2009 at 6:08pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals

Today, I was sitting in the living room with my parents when my dad asked my mom if she knew where he could find some double a batteries. She said to check my vibrator. He said he already did. FML

by lifesux17 / 02/26/2009 at 9:25pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I sneezed so hard I herniated my back. After passing out from the pain I awoke on the floor covered in my own shit and piss. Unable to move, I had to wait in this state for four hours for my wife to return home from work, clean me up and take me to the hospital. FML

by Noname / 01/26/2009 at 7:02pm / Japan (Fukuoka) / Health