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Offline (the 09/20/2014 at 10:15am) | Search for a member
About awkwardology : Hello, fellow profile creeper. I'm Izma and (probably much like you) I love reading others' terrible misfortunes and either laughing derisively at their stupidity or giving them a virtual hug to compensate for the fact that the Universe is torturing them with public humiliation and/or dental floss.
Things that make me happy:
• the concept and making of Facebook
• Peter Pan
• Sherlock Holmes
• All Time Low
• (computer) keyboards
I'm a bit odd but I think I'm alright. Message me if you feel the same!
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
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Today, my sister introduced me to her new, deaf boyfriend. She proudly proclaimed that she was trying to learn sign language for his sake, so he wouldn't have to read her lips. I'm also deaf and have been trying to get her to do the same for me for 20 goddamn years. FML
Today, my boyfriend called me in tears, convinced that he found me in a porn video online. It wasn't me. And when I finally got him to give me the web address, I too started crying at the realization of how fat he thinks I am. FML
Today, I discovered the downside to having a "sneak-attacks-allowed" tickle war with my 4-year-old son. I had to explain to several outraged strangers at the supermarket why my son kept flinching and pulling away whenever I made any sudden movements near him. FML
Today, my boss delivered some flowers and a sympathy card signed by everyone in the office to my cubicle. The card said, "Sorry your mom died". My mom isn't dead. I don't know where they got the idea from and no one believes me. They said that denial is part of grieving. FML
Today, my little sister started freaking out, because she was playing with some white-out eraser and got some on her finger. She started crying inconsolably because she thought her entire finger was going to disappear. FML
Today, on my first day as a lifeguard, a man had a heart attack in the pool. I jumped in, pulled him out, and even went to the hospital with him. He seemed genuinely offended, saying "You should've let me die." FML
Today, my shoes were rubbing against my heel so much that one heel started to bleed. Not having any plasters, I stuffed some tissue down my shoe. When I walked off the train, a wad of blood-stained tissue fell out the back of my shoe. The guy behind me didn't think it came from my shoe. FML
Friday 19 September 2014