About awkwardaardvark2 : I dance crazed teen who cant hold back the awkward moments.
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This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
awkwardaardvark2's favorite FMLs
by ParkerRommel / 01/26/2012 at 10:22pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was taking people's orders at the drive-thru. I was confused as to why people were screaming their orders at me, until one of my managers handed me a paper that he'd found taped to the menu, saying "speak loudly speaker isn't working properly." Punkd. FML
by Ashton Sprunger / 12/30/2011 at 12:38am / United States / Work
by tireedddddd / 11/25/2011 at 11:24am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by insulted / 11/15/2011 at 12:48pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 05/06/2011 at 3:16pm / United Kingdom (Windsor and Maidenhead) / Holidays
Today, my dad woke me up for the second time to get me ready for school. Wanting me to prove I was really awake, he made me sit up. As soon as he left my room, I dozed off and faceplanted my nightstand. FML
by Username / 04/04/2011 at 1:36pm / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous
by SkinsCastSelection / 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm / France / Health
Today, I was at my friend's house. We were looking at her dad's guns, and I was explaining gun safety and how you should never put your finger on the trigger. I then shot a hole in the floor of her house. FML
by Anonymous / 01/03/2011 at 6:18am / United States (Alaska) / Miscellaneous
by Flaps / 11/27/2010 at 7:36am / United States (New York) / Work
Today, I ran over my neighbors' cat. I didn't want it to look like I killed it, so I put it under my other neighbor's car so it would look like they ran over it. The cat's owners were watching me. FML
by awesome / 09/21/2010 at 12:49am / United States (Arizona) / Animals
Today, I got an alert from Facebook that it was my very popular and attractive classmate's birthday. I decided to be sweet and write "Happy birthday" on her wall, only to notice it wasn't there a few minutes later. I rewrote it again and it disappeared. After three attempts, I took the hint. FML
by pandabear / 02/12/2010 at 2:52pm / United Kingdom (Magherafelt) / Miscellaneous
Today, I came home from my 2 week trip to Florida. At the airport, the door said "Enter Only", while a sign above it said "Do not enter." Long story short, I got arrested for "disobeying signs." Nothing says "Welcome home" like being arrested. FML
by Anonymous / 12/22/2009 at 5:08am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by LonelyMonkey / 11/12/2009 at 2:39pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love
Today, I went out with my family and boyfriend for dinner. We were all having a good time, and suddenly at the end of dinner he decides to kneel down on one knee, take out an engagement ring, and say "I choose you, Pikachu," with a straight face. He was serious. FML
by mandy / 09/04/2009 at 10:19pm / United States (California) / Love
- Today, I put on a lacy dress with nothing underneath and walked nonchalantly into the living room.… Today, I walked in on my 15 year old daughter and her boyfriend. They were standing in my bathroom,… Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. As I was beginning to enjoy and really get into it, I heard…