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awkwaard

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awkwaard

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 312
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About awkwaard : Just an English girl living in America. Not much to tell.

awkwaard's page activity

Visits<b>WhiteCrimson</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 2:40pm<b>Fuji76</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 8:46am

awkwaard's FML badges

Socialite

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YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

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awkwaard's favorite FMLs

2DAY I SAT DOWN WITH MY DAUGHTER TO HAVE THE SEX TALK, CUZ SHE RECENTLY STARTED SEEING A GUY. I MENTIONED AT ONE POINT HOW DISAPPOINTED I WOULD BE IF SHE GOT PREGNANT. SHE WENT WIDE-EYED AND ASKED, "DIDN'T MOM TELL YOU?" FML

#20942769
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57774) - you deserved it (6032)

On 11/02/2013 at 5:10pm - kids - by unknown (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

2day my usband an I were arguing, but I dropped it so we could calm down before discussing te matter again!! Later on, e made us lasagna!! Te moment I swallowed te first moutful, e smirked, ten started snickering uncontrollably!! Wat te fuck did e do to my food? FML

#20942539
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46766) - you deserved it (5336)

On 11/02/2013 at 1:34pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I Was At The Dentist. I Ended Up Having Some Work Done And Left With A Numb Mouth. I Have School Picture In Less Than 2 Hours And I Can Neither Smile Nor Stop Drooling Everywhere. FML

#20920258
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43085) - you deserved it (6534)

On 10/14/2013 at 3:32pm - health - by soccer_bball (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went downstairs a little after midnight to grab a snack, and in the dark hallway, I clearly saw a small child walk into the kitchen . I was freaked out, but I followed him in . There was nobody in the room . I'm now too scared to sleep, and am seriously considering moving house .

#20841635
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54983) - you deserved it (4593)

On 08/17/2013 at 12:27pm - misc - by fsfs (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)

Today , I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined , an I had to stand an watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was ( God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking. ) fat FML

#20698637
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68229) - you deserved it (19326)

On 06/01/2013 at 1:09am - intimacy - by Samprib (woman) - United States (Indiana)

TODAY, I CHANGED TEACHER'S POWERPOINT PICTURE TO ME MAKING A FUNNY FACE . HE SAW IT AND CHANGED IT TO A PICTURE OF HIM, WITH A MIDDLE FINGER . FML

#20686826
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18047) - you deserved it (45961)

On 05/26/2013 at 2:46am - work - by ChangoFett - United States (California)

TODAY, MY WATAR BROKA WHILA MY BOYFRIAND WAS BRAAKING UP WITH MA. FML

#20649270
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73673) - you deserved it (6560)

On 05/08/2013 at 1:41am - health - by Carrie - United States (California)

Today, my parent finally got married. At the after-party, my mother got drunk and informed me that even though she and my father were now married, it doesn't change the fact that I'm still a bastard. mega FML

#20631493
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43954) - you deserved it (3360)

On 04/29/2013 at 9:57pm - kids - by SierraCheyenne (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I had a big party plannd. All but one of the guests cancelld. See u at 7, mom. FML

#20630222
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46298) - you deserved it (3650)

On 04/29/2013 at 12:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - Netherlands

While At Work, I Witnessd A Kid Empty His Bladder All Over The Floor. His Mother Walkd Over, Lookd At Me, Said "yep... That Just Happend" An Draggd Him Away. I'm A 30-year-old Man, Four Credits Shy Of A Master's, Stuck Cleaning Up Piss At A Dead-end Job. Big Fat FML

#19867742
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24142) - you deserved it (2829)

On 06/29/2012 at 7:12pm - kids - by ihatewalmart (man) - United States

a littla girl lookad at ma and yallad "Mommy look, tara's a raal lapracaun!" fat FML

#19296318
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23893) - you deserved it (2413)

On 03/17/2012 at 8:48pm - kids - by Redhead4life (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was taking a dump in a public toilet, when a guy in the next stall started drunkenly rapping. He kept trying to get me to rap along with him, eventually bashing the looool wall an threatening to bust my face in if I didn't. I soon found out I can rap to Slob On My Knob pretty well. FML

#19043614
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25837) - you deserved it (2716)

On 02/10/2012 at 8:02pm - misc - by rapper in training (man) - United States

today I was called by a restricted number. Te man on te pone ten explained to me in detail wat I was doing at every second tat I was on te pone wit im. I'm scared to leave my ouse. FML

#18304644
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46028) - you deserved it (2837)

On 11/21/2011 at 1:28am - misc - by bizzyizzy0121 - United States

TODAY, I HEARD ON A TV SHOW THAT IT'S POSSIBLE TO FIT A STANDARD LIGHT-BULB IN YUR MOUTH, BUT IT CAN'T BE REMOVED AFTERWARDS. I JUST HAD TO TRY THIS OUT. AND THEN VISIT THE LOCAL HOSPITAL TO GET IT REMOVED. FML

#17695095
297 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8096) - you deserved it (61835)

On 09/08/2011 at 6:00am - health - by Stuck (man) - United States

Yesterday, I learned that I'm allergic to hornets!! I also learned that when your mom sprays a hornets' nest, and they come after you, that jumping in the pool doesn't help!! They hover and wait 4 u to surface!! FML

#17248199
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36447) - you deserved it (3130)

On 07/25/2011 at 12:14am - health - by sisi9999 (woman) - United States (Georgia)



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