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avealoe

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Visits<b>pdp</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 5:53am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 10/17/2013 at 5:15pm<b>CaptainFoxbutt</b> - the 10/14/2013 at 8:54am

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avealoe's favorite FMLs

Today, my uncle gave me a very expensive bottle of champagne at a celebratory family event. We were celebrating me spending 1 year sober. FML

#20951207
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44420) - you deserved it (3148)

On 11/09/2013 at 8:20am - misc - by Falling off the wagon - United Kingdom (Brighton and Hove)

Today, I went on what I thought was a date. After a wonderful night with a perfect gentleman, he told me how excited he is that he's moving in with his girlfriend next week, and thanked me for reassuring him that he doesn't want anyone but her. FML

#20950992
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49794) - you deserved it (3480)

On 11/09/2013 at 12:17am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I noticed that my sweat smelled like cat food. FML

#20928538
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33071) - you deserved it (6564)

On 10/21/2013 at 2:53am - health - by anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my son came home for the fifth time saying he didn't get the job, wondering what he did wrong. I looked at his resumé; under special skills was, "Keeping it real." Apparently he saw it in a movie and thought it would work. FML

#20928390
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40071) - you deserved it (4943)

On 10/21/2013 at 12:18am - kids - by Wheredigowrong - United States (Iowa)

Today, I got a call from my daughter’s school today. She had been telling the teacher, "I have a huge boner." Apparently, some of the kids at school told her it meant 'headache' and she's been saying it all day. FML

#20928358
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41372) - you deserved it (3170)

On 10/20/2013 at 11:51pm - kids - by momaaa1342 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I realized that when my dad said he would pay for my college, he really meant that he was going to forge my signature on a student loan in my name and not make payments on it. FML

#20927730
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45868) - you deserved it (3207)

On 10/20/2013 at 4:34pm - money - by oh... (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, a few of my friends arranged for us to go skinny-dipping with the guy I really like. It went really well, until a turd surfaced before our eyes. After we scrambled out of the pool in panic, my crush called us all freaks and left. FML

#20927673
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40752) - you deserved it (5481)

On 10/20/2013 at 3:56pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up with a raging hangover. I soon checked my phone, only to find that I'd drunkenly sent nude pictures to several friends' numbers, as well as to my own. I'd then replied to my own message, saying that I'm not gay and telling myself to fuck off. FML

#20925183
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27192) - you deserved it (39032)

On 10/18/2013 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boss gave me a verbal warning. My crime? Calling people "hon", "darlin'", and the like. I work at a Texas diner. FML

#20924228
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42696) - you deserved it (5269)

On 10/17/2013 at 5:36pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I let a friend cut my hair. I soon went from having a 'fro to looking like I lost a fight with a lawn mower. FML

#20923915
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31861) - you deserved it (16040)

On 10/17/2013 at 12:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, in calculus, our substitute teacher told me I was smart. Everybody in the class, including my friends, burst out laughing. FML

#20923824
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41916) - you deserved it (4257)

On 10/17/2013 at 9:43am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was at the dentist getting a cavity fixed for the first time. The dentist showed me the drill and other tools, and referred to them as things like "Mr. Bumpy Brush". I'm 15. She thought I was "special". FML

#20923550
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42444) - you deserved it (3819)

On 10/17/2013 at 1:06am - health - by maxkeyftw (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out my handwriting is so bad that people think I write in Arabic. FML

#20922701
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41609) - you deserved it (9333)

On 10/16/2013 at 1:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I replaced a usually fun collegue's picture of his kids with a picture of my face against glass, so it looked I was inside the screen. Everyone laughed, but he reported me because I tried to "erase his children" and "if anything happens to them" it's now my fault. FML

#20922441
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41024) - you deserved it (5047)

On 10/16/2013 at 4:22am - work - by Elcam (man) - Belgium

Today, I was maced. Not by a person, but rather by one of those automatic air fresheners in the bathroom. It was conveniently placed at eye level, you know, for freshness. FML

#20921961
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39227) - you deserved it (2820)

On 10/15/2013 at 8:38pm - health - by erockinthesuburb (man) - United States (Indiana)



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