About authorkid : Boo.
I have no life.
About authorkid : Boo.
authorkid's FML badges
One ring to rule them all
You submitted an FML that was successfully published on the website. This makes you an exceptional human being.
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
authorkid's favorite FMLs
Today, at a Christmas party, my crush came up to me and cutely pointed out that I was standing under mistletoe. The only response my stupid brain could think of was, "Probably full of nargles though." He gave me a confused look and walked away. FML
by Rhine / 12/16/2012 at 6:51pm / Barbados (Saint Michael) / Love
by Anonymous / 10/16/2011 at 12:22am / United States (Texas) / Love
by Anonymous / 05/22/2011 at 4:31pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, as I was about to go in the bathroom, a girl walked out, shaking water off her hands. Some of it landed on my face, and I just wiped it off. Then she said to her friend who was waiting for her, "The sink's broken. Can I use your hand sanitizer?" So what landed on my face? FML
by anon / 03/05/2011 at 5:15am / United States (California) / Health
by edulover / 12/31/2010 at 8:16pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by fme / 12/08/2010 at 9:34am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
Today, I was taking off my underwear to change into fresh clothes. Pulling them down, I realize there's a big fat spider in them. Not only did I have a spider chilling with my genitals the whole day, but I'm deathly afraid of them. FML
by dickwebs / 11/21/2010 at 10:42pm / Germany / Animals
by Bob / 11/11/2010 at 10:55pm / United States (Texas) / Love
by nothingdoes / 10/27/2010 at 1:59pm / United States / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 10/21/2010 at 10:25pm / United States / Love
Today, I found out the man I'm getting a ride from drives a windowless van and is "excited to see me". My friends had encouraged me to sign up for the cheap-ride program because it was less expensive than taking a train. If I never come back, look for a windowless van somewhere in Europe. FML
by deadinavan / 10/13/2010 at 8:57am / Germany (Bayern) / Transportation
by ifpigsflew / 10/04/2010 at 7:31pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Health
Today, at work, I was called into the office by my supervisor, on whom I have a massive crush. He called me in to get my password to make some adjustments on my work account and asked me what my password was. I had to hold eye contact with him and tell him my password is his full name. FML
by Anonymous / 10/03/2010 at 1:08am / United States (California) / Work
by Anonymous / 09/22/2010 at 3:47am / Venezuela (Distrito Federal) / Love
- Today, my daughter asked me what is the youngest age at which you should start having sex. Being a… Today, while having some "personal" time, I felt intense pleasure and moaned. I learned that my own… Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex, and he asked me to tell him what I wanted him to…