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auntiecassie's FML badges
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
auntiecassie's favorite FMLs
Today, I was having a funny conversation with a guy I had met on Xbox. I told him the state I lived in, and he said, "Don't tell me that, I might stalk you." He wasn't kidding. He has somehow found out my phone number, and my address. He says he's going to send me flowers. FML
by ExplosiveDildo / 06/22/2012 at 9:08am / Afghanistan / Geek
Today, I made a phone call in my office to my doctor. He wanted to call a prescription to my pharmacy, but wanted to know by what method I would prefer my medication. During our conversation, a group of potential clients walked in just as I exclaimed "I definitely prefer oral." FML
by me / 06/22/2012 at 3:28am / United States (Indiana) / Work
Today, I entered my first professional fight as a mixed martial artist. It's been my dream to become a UFC champion one day. All I do is train and watch UFC fights all day. I was out cold in a matter of seconds. FML
by yeah / 06/21/2012 at 11:07pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, when I told my family I was a vegetarian, I expected them to make fun of me because that's just my family. But what I wasn't expecting was my dad to use raw meat as a puppet and make it say, "Eat me! Eat me!" then throw it at my face. FML
by Anonymous / 06/21/2012 at 10:52am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/20/2012 at 7:08pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health
Today, I went bra shopping with my mother. She insisted that I try on a bunch of push-up bras, and I told her I didn't want to, because it's false advertising. She looked at me and said that I need all the help I can get. FML
by historyfreak_17 / 06/17/2012 at 3:11am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/17/2012 at 12:53am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Mega_bug / 06/16/2012 at 10:14pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
by mystery / 06/16/2012 at 10:08pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
by Schaf_12 / 06/16/2012 at 2:10pm / Austria (Wien) / Love
by anonymous / 06/16/2012 at 9:57am / United States / Love
by sadphonegirl / 06/16/2012 at 9:44am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I decided to motivate myself to workout by looking at a picture of a guy with a six-pack on my computer screen while doing abs. My dad walked in after I finished and was still breathing heavily from working out. FML
by NotGay / 06/16/2012 at 1:45am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by Cassidy Bowen / 06/16/2012 at 1:42am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I visited my new doctor for the migraines I've been getting lately. Right from the start, I could have sworn the guy was on drugs. He just listened to my heartbeat, said, "Well Dave, it sounds like gallstones" and said they'll pass naturally. FML
by davav74 / 06/15/2012 at 7:31pm / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Health
- Today, I finally got intimate with my girlfriend, the girl of my dreams. I undressed and, ready to… Today, after two years of dating, I gave my virginity to my boyfriend on my birthday. It wasn't as… Today, my girlfriend has big fake boobs, but gets offended when I tell her how much I like them. FML
- Today, I woke up to find out I had a violent dream last night. At least that's what I'm inferring… Today, I got home from a double shift to find my husband in bed with my sister. Also, I found out I… Today, I woke up from a dream in which I was making passionate love with a beautiful woman. The bad…