About audreyates : Message me if you want to talk, oh, and follow me. :) xx
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Who’s the fairest of them all?
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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
audreyates's favorite FMLs
Today, my six-year-old got in an argument with my four-year-old. I told them to go outside. The next thing I know, my son was standing in front of his sister's burning Barbie's Malibu Dream House, singing "Burn Baby Burn" and cackling madly. FML
by TraumatizedMother / 10/02/2011 at 3:27am / United States (New York) / Kids
by Anonymous / 09/19/2011 at 10:39am / United States (Washington) / Health
by sweatstreaks / 09/16/2011 at 5:38am / United Kingdom (Wiltshire) / Miscellaneous
Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML
by IbetIgotAIDS / 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy
by kidswithnomanners / 09/05/2011 at 1:04pm / United States (New York) / Kids
by Anonymous / 09/01/2011 at 6:52am / United States / Health
by Anonymous / 09/01/2011 at 3:07am / United Kingdom / Love
by Emily / 08/21/2011 at 12:54am / United States (New York) / Intimacy
Today, I was teasing my 12 year old little cousin about him liking my best friend. I guess it made him mad because he yelled "Breast cancer!" at the top of his lungs before power-punching my right boob. FML
by brittbrat4 / 08/13/2011 at 2:51am / United States (Florida) / Kids
by Username / 08/08/2011 at 8:03pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, I was sitting in the hospital waiting area. An old lady was crying, and my five year old daughter asked her, "Are you okay?" The woman quietly nodded, prompting my daughter to scream at the top of her lungs, "Well shut up then!" FML
by Anonymous / 08/06/2011 at 9:40pm / United States / Kids
by Anonymous / 08/05/2011 at 6:57pm / United Kingdom (Nottingham) / Intimacy
by INside / 08/02/2011 at 12:52am / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by buiuuum / 07/27/2011 at 12:35pm / United States (Michigan) / Kids
by skiittlez713 / 05/20/2011 at 4:40am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
- Today, my girlfriend and I were going to have sex. To set the mood, she suggested we watch a porno… Today, I told a cashier I always bullshit with that I was getting a new tattoo. She shook her head… Today, I was in my room with the door locked and my mom knocked on the door. I said "don't come in,…