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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1363
  • Number of comments : 126
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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asoptavlo14's page activity

Visits<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 09/16/2016 at 5:50pm<b>mcr101</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 10:36am<b>Bonngoo</b> - the 03/06/2016 at 11:11pm<b>snipebp</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 2:26pm<b>Tymaster5</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 5:30am<b>Kjaerlighet</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 2:20am<b>redstone7693</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 4:19pm<b>OwlsMakeBowels</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 10:40am<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 6:36pm<b>Driving_Gaming</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 9:24pm<b>johnrdz3</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 11:36am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 9:41pm<b>icceman828</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 2:57pm<b>Henriqu3e</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 7:50am<b>flopstar</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 12:06am<b>oops6663</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 4:25pm<b>mrlawlor7777</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 9:59pm<b>arishat28</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 10:57pm

Fucked!<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 5:43am<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 12:36am<b>flopstar</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 6:06am

asoptavlo14's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.


You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of asoptavlo14's badges

asoptavlo14's favorite FMLs

Today, I received a text from my dad, which was borderline-incomprehensible due to an insane amount of text language. I replied, jokingly asked if he had a stroke while writing it. A few seconds after hitting send, I remembered the stroke he suffered last month. FML

by hellbound / 07/12/2013 at 12:35pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had an upset stomach. I decided to quickly take out the trash before heading to the bathroom. As I opened the trash can lid, a raccoon jumped out. I learned the literal meaning of being scared shitless. FML

by TheCerealKiller / 08/07/2012 at 5:19am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I caught my elderly neighbour skinny-dipping in my pool. FML

by babyeaternomnom / 06/30/2012 at 12:22pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, in a rush to get my clothes back on at my girlfriend's house at the sound of her parents opening the front door, I forgot to take the condom off. Her dad watched it fall out of my pant leg and onto the kitchen floor. FML

by Anonymous / 05/31/2012 at 4:53pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I paid top dollar for an Italian soda that ended up consisting almost entirely of ice. When I complained, the girl insisted that the soda water stopped the ice from melting. She said she didn't see what the problem was, and threatened to have me thrown out if I didn't "simmer down." FML

by Sharkie49 / 03/26/2012 at 6:33pm / United States (California) / Money

Today, I was called an assortment of names and was almost followed home by a crazy bitch. Why? Because I stated that it was unsanitary for her to bring her dog to a grocery store. She clearly disagreed. FML

by Anon / 03/08/2012 at 6:53am / United States / Animals

Today, while waiting for my grandmother at the train station, a girl walked out and climbed into my car. When I cleared my throat to tell her of her mistake, she screamed and ran out as if I was a criminal trying to abduct her. FML

by eldar90 / 02/25/2012 at 4:38pm / Israel / Miscellaneous

Today, I was preparing dinner for my in-laws for the first time. Nervous, I accidentally spilled the pasta into the sink. With nothing else to prepare, I quickly scooped it all back out. No-one would have been any the wiser, if the kitchen sponge hadn't shown up in the middle of the meal. FML

by Laviolette / 02/23/2012 at 5:01pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, I was so broke and hungry that I went to Olive Garden and faked being stood up, just so I could eat their breadsticks. FML

by 97 / 02/17/2012 at 4:10pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at a Buddhist shrine and wanted to light a candle for my friend who's having a rough time, when I got stung by a bee. I spent the next hour with a swollen shoulder. How does karma work again? FML

by thairsha / 02/09/2012 at 6:05am / Japan / Health

Today, after having finally summoned the nerve to report a guy at my workplace who has been sexually harassing me for months, I got a phone call from my boss. He said that there was nothing he could do about it, because the guy "wouldn't confess." FML

by jaycee / 01/27/2012 at 10:41pm / United States / Work

Today, I won a lifetime supply of pineapples. One problem, I'm allergic to pineapples. FML

by dusk / 01/05/2012 at 3:09am / United States (Colorado) / Health

Today, I dressed up as Santa Claus for my employees' children. After seeing all the others, my daughter's turn arrived. She sat on my lap, put her lips to my ear, and whispered softly: "I want a new dad." FML

by perenoel / 12/03/2011 at 11:24am / France / Kids

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me with a voice card. It said "Marry me Amber?" I'm not Amber. That's his ex. FML

by dubblechic / 01/18/2011 at 1:16pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I ran over my neighbors' cat. I didn't want it to look like I killed it, so I put it under my other neighbor's car so it would look like they ran over it. The cat's owners were watching me. FML

by awesome / 09/21/2010 at 12:49am / United States (Arizona) / Animals