Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Offline (the 03/27/2015 at 4:46am) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3066
  • Number of comments : 341
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About asnakelovinbabe : Hi. I'm Shannon. This one time I put hats and mustaches on my snakes. You might love them:

You're probably here because you just saw a comment of mine defending how awesome spiders or snakes are, and you were wanting to see what kind of crazy person says these things. I understand.

In all seriousness though. I am a snake hobbyist specializing in keeping, breeding, photographing, and educating about snakes of many kinds. Even though my passion is snakes, I love and have a deep respect for all critters, from dogs and cats and rats to spiders and salamanders. I particularly love moths, I raise luna, cecropia and rosy maple moths and I also enjoy collecting and mounting specimens of moths and butterflies.

I am also an avid gamer and a professional polymer clay artist. My day job is sculpting reptile artwork. I'm happily married to a wonderful husband. I like to spend as much free time as possible outdoors with my camera.

Shadow hide you.

asnakelovinbabe's page activity

Visits<b>edenxero</b> - the 11/06/2015 at 1:23am<b>Kitty1811</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 8:31am<b>beeferjay</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 3:55pm<b>arsh_fz</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 8:44pm<b>C7</b> - the 10/10/2015 at 9:00pm<b>ToxicTyrael</b> - the 10/09/2015 at 11:34am<b>melons</b> - the 10/02/2015 at 7:43pm<b>Sedar_Tree</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 10:37am<b>Shamandalie89</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 8:51am<b>Kitten_love</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 1:24pm<b>Sizly</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 1:27am<b>britbear0731</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 1:58pm<b>papygeorges</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 7:03pm<b>Bgrish</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 12:37am<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 07/09/2015 at 5:18am<b>captainwhiskers</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 10:44pm<b>HarryHirsch</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 1:07am<b>2nd</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 8:12pm

Fucked!<b>CalebRasmus</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 6:34am<b>Captain_Derpz</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 8:42am<b>Life_sucksXx</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 10:00am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 4:17pm<b>thatguynamedsky</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 4:12pm<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 6:29am<b>poncho55</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 7:45pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 6:10am<b>kittycat_2002</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 9:29pm<b>stonedfly3</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 12:09am<b>AdrianVerdugo</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 5:01am<b>Smiley_70</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 2:14pm<b>PickledSweets</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 8:33pm<b>YoloXboxSwag</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 2:54pm

asnakelovinbabe's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.


Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of asnakelovinbabe's badges

asnakelovinbabe's favorite FMLs

Today, I was making love to my boyfriend. In the heat of the moment, I said his name. He immediately stopped, gave me a deadly serious look and said "Huh? What?" FML


I agree, your life sucks (35887) - you deserved it (4651)

On 10/24/2014 at 10:48pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my girlfriend's dad returned home from deployment. Being the grade A fucktard that I am, I got flustered and asked, "So um, did you make it back?" He looked me dead in the eyes and said completely deadpan, "No, obviously I died. Moron." FML


I agree, your life sucks (36677) - you deserved it (24619)

On 08/01/2014 at 4:45pm - misc - by whoops (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my boyfriend reckoned that he has a better sleep when he falls asleep with his hand on either my boobs or my ass. I kind of just laughed it off. I later discovered he's 100% correct when he put his hand on my butt, and not five minutes later was snoring. FML


I agree, your life sucks (43864) - you deserved it (7375)

On 07/22/2014 at 4:44am - love - by and the truth comes out (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had to tell my ex that I'm pregnant with his baby. I sent him a casual "Hey :)" text to try to ease into things. He replied, "WHO THE FUCK IS THIS?" and ended up threatening to make my life hell if I don't tell my new boyfriend that the child is his. FML


I agree, your life sucks (44468) - you deserved it (13799)

On 04/05/2014 at 1:48pm - work - by =( (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I followed my wife out, since she's been acting strangely lately and I was suspicious. She met up with a guy at a restaurant, who she later claimed was her brother. Either she's cheating on me, or it's tradition in her family to make out and grope each other at the end of meals. FML


I agree, your life sucks (60867) - you deserved it (4660)

On 03/15/2014 at 5:48pm - love - by broken vows (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that my 15-year-old son is a prolific creator of My Little Pony themed hentai. I'm not a judgmental man, but he's probably going to hell. FML


I agree, your life sucks (44470) - you deserved it (8304)

On 03/09/2014 at 6:32pm - kids - by ashamed father (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I asked my boss for a few days off next week, because my grandmother passed away yesterday and I'll need to travel to attend the funeral. His response: "She's dead, you're not. You want time off, then quit." FML


I agree, your life sucks (58853) - you deserved it (3678)

On 03/07/2014 at 5:31pm - misc - by GLHan (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my hippy nutjob of a roommate threw a bitch fit at me, all because he saw me chopping down a tree in Minecraft. FML


I agree, your life sucks (45375) - you deserved it (4910)

On 03/07/2014 at 4:25pm - misc - by fuck off, eh! (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I awoke to the sound of a gunshot, followed by children screaming. I leapt out of bed and ran to my balcony, only to see people casually milling around the elementary school parking lot under a "Science Fair" banner. A kid's science experiment scared me shitless. FML

Today, after waking up, I walk into the kitchen to see my two-year-old with a blue sharpie in hand as he says, "Look mom, color!" He left no appliance or cabinet untouched in his coloring masterpiece, and I'm still trying to figure out where he got the sharpie from. FML

Today, I went down on the girl of my dreams. While I was down there, I started to put on a condom. As I came back up to start having sex, she told me she couldn't cheat on her boyfriend. FML


I agree, your life sucks (64221) - you deserved it (12556)

On 01/31/2014 at 10:29am - intimacy - by wtfjusthappened - United States (Washington)

Today, my friends and I spent a little too long enjoying a beautiful cliff overlooking the ocean. We spent the next 3 hours lost in a pitch black jungle with only one pocket-sized flashlight. FML


I agree, your life sucks (36874) - you deserved it (12340)

On 09/30/2013 at 7:18am - misc - by sothisishowidie - Guam

Today, while at the doctor's, a week overdue with my first child, I was told that sex and orgasms can sometimes help to induce labor. On the way home, my boyfriend asked for road head, arguing that "She said that stuff about orgasms." Not you, honey. FML


I agree, your life sucks (60946) - you deserved it (7004)

On 07/08/2013 at 1:03pm - intimacy - by realitybites (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my mother-in-lawyer threatened to sue me unless I took my professional wedding photographs off Facebook as she did not like that they made her look fat. She is over 300 pounds. FML


I agree, your life sucks (71591) - you deserved it (4625)

On 07/03/2013 at 11:10am - intimacy - by Nicks - United States (Nevada)

Today, the massive bogey that had been dangling precariously from my manager's nose for half an hour finally detached itself. Into my coffee. FML


I agree, your life sucks (47001) - you deserved it (5086)

On 07/03/2013 at 5:09am - work - by melons (woman) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Mselle Risa's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • FML Pics : The top 4 pics
  • They say that a picture is worth a boring bunch of words thrown at you by a corporate robot. That's true. Corporate robots are the worst. Anyway, the FML Pics app is still being downloaded all over the…

Tuesday 24 November 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: