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ashole1990

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ashole1990
  • Town/Country : marietta, united states
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 4 August 1990 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 28601
  • Number of comments : 84
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About ashole1990 : hmm. im a full time college student and a full time worker. not much of a life.

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ashole1990's favorite FMLs

Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML

#18733573 (254)

I agree, your life sucks (4749) - you deserved it (8070)

On 01/07/2012 at 5:27am - intimacy - by Danny - Australia

Today, my brother lost his first tooth, so I told him the tooth fairy is going to give him money. He now thinks The Rock is going to show up in his room. FML

#18327184 (313)

I agree, your life sucks (21358) - you deserved it (4334)

On 11/23/2011 at 2:14pm - kids - by G. Briones -

Today, I punched myself in the face while trying to eat a GoGurt. FML

#18112620 (314)

I agree, your life sucks (6754) - you deserved it (4144)

On 10/30/2011 at 4:15pm - misc - by yum yogurt - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my parents got rid of our detachable shower head. Looks like I'm single again. FML

#18070582 (366)

I agree, your life sucks (19381) - you deserved it (20888)

On 10/25/2011 at 6:15am - intimacy - by sad - Reserved

Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML

#17586114 (267)

I agree, your life sucks (22920) - you deserved it (3720)

On 08/26/2011 at 1:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I promised my boyfriend a blow job every time he does the dishes. Every dish in the house has been washed three times already. FML

#15718627 (352)

I agree, your life sucks (6604) - you deserved it (1465)

On 04/10/2011 at 1:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML

#15627116 (352)

I agree, your life sucks (37910) - you deserved it (10098)

On 04/03/2011 at 9:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML

#15539670 (286)

I agree, your life sucks (37019) - you deserved it (11543)

On 03/28/2011 at 11:33pm - love - by ouch - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was hiking, and four miles away from my car and civilization, I tripped over a rock into a cactus. I used duct tape, which ripped all the hair off my arms and legs but ignored the spikes. FML

#15493729 (108)

I agree, your life sucks (18687) - you deserved it (4730)

On 03/26/2011 at 2:32am - misc - by Broderick (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my wife created a "Points Reward" system for the privilege of sex. 10 points for doing the dishes, 20 for the laundry, etc. How many points do I need before I can have sex with her? 2300. FML

#15430260 (745)

I agree, your life sucks (58483) - you deserved it (10923)

On 03/22/2011 at 10:59am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, after my 22 year old son realized that there was no more contact solution, he decided to use tequila because he thought it would "kill the germs." We had to go to the hospital to have his eyes flushed out. I raised this moron. FML

#15339337 (227)

I agree, your life sucks (33476) - you deserved it (8223)

On 03/16/2011 at 6:05pm - kids - by WTF -

Today, my girlfriend said "It's funny how every time we have sex I'm wearing these panties." We've been having sex every day for the last six days. FML

#15002281 (267)

I agree, your life sucks (37809) - you deserved it (4796)

On 02/16/2011 at 12:51pm - intimacy - by Lovenem (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my girlfriend told me she was bored. During sex. FML

#15001390 (123)

I agree, your life sucks (24817) - you deserved it (15723)

On 02/16/2011 at 10:47am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, my Dad gave me the dreaded sex talk, but he got sidetracked and started talking about how good my mum was in bed. FML

#14998029 (89)

I agree, your life sucks (37470) - you deserved it (2787)

On 02/16/2011 at 12:50am - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today, I was working as an intern at a day care. One of the kids touched my chest a couple of times, and I jokingly told him that he shouldn't touch old and ugly women like me. So he started groping the little girls instead. When the other teachers asked him why, he said I had told him to. FML

#14974014 (83)

I agree, your life sucks (22597) - you deserved it (8216)

On 02/14/2011 at 1:51pm - kids - by Mikabe (woman) - Sweden (Varmlands Lan)