ashleyek

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ashleyek

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 10 December 1996 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2911
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About ashleyek : I just do things on the Internet.

ashleyek's page activity

Visits<b>ratman775</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 4:10pm<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 8:51pm<b>martini47</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 3:30pm<b>grogers311</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 7:14pm<b>watchwhileusleep</b> - the 02/24/2014 at 10:30am<b>mkhikaru</b> - the 02/24/2014 at 10:29am<b>asiansensation2</b> - the 02/24/2014 at 10:28am<b>SuperDani</b> - the 02/24/2014 at 10:00am<b>jubeoe</b> - the 01/09/2014 at 6:57am<b>flupsht</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 6:57pm<b>Domo17</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 5:22am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 4:42am<b>Tho0omY</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 4:38am<b>KatieKupcake4195</b> - the 08/12/2013 at 10:41pm<b>Quiltme00</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 3:35pm<b>Nordrag</b> - the 06/30/2013 at 8:32pm<b>rob02</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 3:13pm<b>mdcdeve</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 11:56pm

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ashleyek's favorite FMLs

Today, my mother and I went to a meeting at my school about a camping trip the students in my grade will be going on. When the time to ask questions came, my mother raised her hand and loudly asked, "What if my child is on their period during the trip?" FML

by Bebefer / 03/15/2012 at 3:49am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my therapist gave me some great self-sufficiency advice. It sounded familiar. When I got home I realized she had been quoting Christina Aguilera songs. For £100 an hour. FML

by PixieWrists / 03/13/2012 at 1:33pm / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Health

Today, I was given a bottle of vitamins that are supposed to help your memory. I forgot them at home. FML

by Anonymous / 03/09/2012 at 10:14am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, an African-American family came into the restaurant at which I work. They said, "Jackson, party of 5." After I laughed, I realized they were serious. FML

by Miss_Kristen / 02/26/2012 at 10:31am / United States (Missouri) / Work

Today, my granddad had to start sleeping in my bedroom. He has flashback dreams to when he was a boxer, and he's already lamped my granny three times in his sleep. I get a camp-bed, and the chance to listen to him snore like a wild boar. FML

by Lovernotafighter / 02/24/2012 at 6:36am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my wife is pregnant again. During her last two pregnancies, she craved pop-tarts and screamed bloody murder at the drop of a hat, so I went out and bought a box for her. Turns out that this time, pop-tarts make her want to puke. Cue screaming. FML

by Anonymous / 02/22/2012 at 2:55pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, I was so broke and hungry that I went to Olive Garden and faked being stood up, just so I could eat their breadsticks. FML

by 97 / 02/17/2012 at 4:10pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, even though she can barely deal with raising kids, my 19-year-old sister announced her fourth pregnancy, by a fourth man, of yet another race. Why? Because she wants to "be like Angelina Jolie." I fear that social services may laugh at me if I tell them. FML

by amythest / 02/12/2012 at 7:18pm / United Kingdom (Belfast) / Kids

Today, a train hit me. A slow mini-train full of kindergartners who were on a tour of the museum I was visiting. FML

by MahSquito / 02/05/2012 at 9:14pm / United States / Health

Today, while I was washing my hands, I sneezed so hard that I smacked my head against the faucet. I now have a lump the size of a goose egg on my head. I'm not sure if it's going to hatch, or if that's just the brain damage talking. FML

by Anonymous / 01/28/2012 at 12:09pm / United States (Michigan) / Health

Today, my school's 6'2, 270-pound, 375-pound bench-pressing football superstar knocked me unconscious in one hit. With a dodgeball. FML

by Shameful / 01/18/2012 at 2:57pm / United States (Alabama) / Health

Today, my crush grabbed my butt while I was walking up the stairs. In surprise I farted. He won't even look me in the eyes now. FML

by anonymous / 01/15/2012 at 12:58am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the movies on a date. My chair made a fart sound while I moved around a little, so my date thought I'd let one rip. He then let out a really horrendously smelling one to make me feel less embarrassed, giving me a reassuring look. FML

by Whyme / 01/09/2012 at 1:14am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my 9 month old son realized he is just as tired as I am. His solution is to cry loudly. My solution was to cry along with him. FML

by anonymous / 12/28/2011 at 3:14am / United States (Oregon) / Kids

Today, after spending months learning how to play the guitar and memorizing the music to my girlfriend's all-time favorite song, I performed it for her. Her response? "Well, you kind of ruined that song for me now." FML

by tommy / 12/20/2011 at 5:41pm / United States (Georgia) / Love