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ashley_burton_

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ashley_burton_

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 8 January 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 275
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About ashley_burton_ : Hi(:
Send me a message?☺
The names ashley✌
Alabama is where I call home

ashley_burton_'s page activity

Visits<b>ColbyGB</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 12:04am<b>k_gils</b> - the 12/27/2013 at 11:16am<b>heffastera</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 4:56pm<b>cskipgolfer2013</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 9:22am<b>gt3mqx</b> - the 09/30/2013 at 3:13pm<b>taylor27gang</b> - the 09/30/2013 at 10:17am<b>chamay</b> - the 09/26/2013 at 11:23am<b>sweet0cheeks</b> - the 09/26/2013 at 9:07am<b>dlowry004</b> - the 09/26/2013 at 3:38am<b>doubledutchy</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 7:58pm<b>HullScott</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 6:57am<b>HopelesslyCiara5</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 8:47pm<b>Vanillanougat</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 5:42pm<b>TyT63</b> - the 09/21/2013 at 11:42pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 09/21/2013 at 11:35am<b>shibeep</b> - the 09/21/2013 at 9:08am<b>CholoChino</b> - the 08/19/2013 at 11:32pm<b>schmuckjon79</b> - the 08/16/2013 at 2:39pm

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ashley_burton_'s favorite FMLs

Today, I used a restroom. While doing my thing, the power in my building completely went out. There was another person in the restroom making demonic noises and scratching at my stall. When the power came back on, he was gone. I think I'm being haunted. FML

#20867818
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44328) - you deserved it (2987)

On 09/04/2013 at 6:46pm - work - by dear god help me. - United States (Hawaii)

Today, a shopper asked me where my nipples were. Seeing as I work in Babies'R'Us, this is a common question. I brought her over to the nursing equipment aisle where she then grabbed my nipples, gave them a twist, and walked away. I need a new job. FML

Today, I got a message from my brother on Facebook that read, "They're watching you." This wouldn't have been such a big deal if he hadn't been dead for two years. FML

#20773595
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76073) - you deserved it (3701)

On 07/10/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Wtf (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I've come to the conclusion that my phone addiction is getting out of control after I typed my PIN code into the microwave. FML

#20754108
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25187) - you deserved it (35833)

On 06/29/2013 at 10:57am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I walked into the room naked while my wife was on the computer to surprise her. She smiled, put down her laptop and left for the bathroom so I started jerking it in anticipation. It was really feeling good until my wife's best friend, who was on Skype, started giggling. FML

#20550602
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48787) - you deserved it (21850)

On 03/19/2013 at 8:31am - intimacy - by fredo (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, a cute guy who works at the mall winked at me. When I met up with my boyfriend, I bragged to him about it. His response was, "Don't flatter yourself, he winked at me too." FML

#20550170
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31627) - you deserved it (15950)

On 03/18/2013 at 11:29pm - love - by amberrenee91 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out my boyfriend has a chicken nugget fetish. He wants me to take a chicken nugget bath in a bikini. He seems to be dead serious. FML

#20549296
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44423) - you deserved it (4554)

On 03/18/2013 at 2:10pm - intimacy - by chickenmcnuggetgirl (woman) - Ireland (Meath)

Today, my parents asked me if I was sexually active. My grandma then screamed from upstairs, "She's not even physically active!" FML

#20548943
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48309) - you deserved it (14410)

On 03/18/2013 at 4:59am - intimacy - by Susan (woman) - Ireland

Today, an attractive guy came up to me and told me that I looked sexy in a picture online. He then asked himself why he had never asked me out before. Apparently, he doesn't remember our 6-month relationship, or how it ended when he slept with my sister. FML

#20548927
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42816) - you deserved it (3087)

On 03/18/2013 at 4:28am - love - by mcds2 (woman) - United States

Today, I asked my boyfriend to give me a back rub. He claimed that he had a sore hand, so I retorted, "You have two hands, right?" Still bitter about not being able to have sex with me while I'm on my period, he shot back, "You have two holes, right?" I give up. FML

#20540243
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32953) - you deserved it (50838) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/11/2013 at 8:21pm - intimacy - by Lilypad (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I saw a woman breastfeeding at the natural foods market. It's the first time I've seen a woman's nipple in over two years. I've been married for ten. FML

Today, our dog jumped on the bed while my fiancé and I were having sex, and let out the most horrific fart. My fiancé, like a gentleman, held my nose closed while he continued banging me. FML

Today, a technician from my ISP came to my house to replace my router. He asked for a glass of water, one thing led to another, and for some reason I'll never fully understand, we ended up having sex. Looks like porn logic is not so far off the mark after all. FML

#20537010
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20507) - you deserved it (59933)

On 03/09/2013 at 1:50pm - intimacy - by je_regrette_tout (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, one of my elderly swimming students ran into me at Walmart. Being a polite teenager, I said hi to him. He looked at me surprised and said, "Oh dear! I didn't recognize you with your clothes on!" I'll never forget the look on his wife's face. FML

#20536627
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37230) - you deserved it (2857)

On 03/09/2013 at 2:02am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, my boyfriend left me for a girl I know. She was the girl my last boyfriend left me for. FML

#20536593
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48331) - you deserved it (3387)

On 03/09/2013 at 1:16am - love - by itsnotyouitsher - Australia (New South Wales)



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