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Offline (the 08/25/2015 at 6:37pm) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9156
  • Number of comments : 43
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About asdfghjklana : Hi, I'm Alana and have no life whatsoever

asdfghjklana's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 10:35am<b>clairesucks</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 8:13am<b>clubbing4life</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 9:01pm<b>iSonia</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 8:46pm<b>Gaber64</b> - the 03/02/2014 at 9:52am<b>brittanymarie15</b> - the 11/21/2013 at 3:51am<b>nightninja22</b> - the 08/05/2013 at 4:39pm<b>Aspireworks</b> - the 07/18/2013 at 3:28am<b>Stypahorlikson</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 11:09pm<b>Brock_Dudeson</b> - the 06/19/2013 at 10:41pm<b>hiitsmeeeeeee</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 12:52pm<b>xALEXx</b> - the 05/16/2013 at 8:33am<b>Yezetnia</b> - the 03/24/2013 at 4:41pm<b>PerditaDessa</b> - the 03/21/2013 at 11:22pm<b>SillyGirl4602</b> - the 03/03/2013 at 1:28am<b>Make_Believe</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 7:27pm<b>Uncgirl</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 7:01pm<b>bfsd42</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 3:25pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 4:35pm

asdfghjklana's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

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asdfghjklana's favorite FMLs

Today, I let my dog outside to play. He shat on three cars, played dead in the middle of the street, and chased my neighbors' cat into a pool. When he came back into the house, he had a note taped to his back saying "IOU 1 lawsuit". FML

Today, I broke my nose trying to pop a zit. FML


I agree, your life sucks (46873) - you deserved it (21271)

On 06/09/2014 at 3:36pm - health - by blanknameisblank (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I entered my late twenties. My hair's falling out and I'm putting on weight at light speed. At least I can keep my youthful appearance with the acne I still suffer from. FML


I agree, your life sucks (43712) - you deserved it (4886)

On 06/05/2014 at 7:12am - misc - by hifhfan (man) - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)

Today, I searched up ways to fix my eyebrows since they were so bushy and thick. I took my tweezers and set to work. It went to shit. So now, I have one completely straight eyebrow that makes me look like Bert from Sesame Street and another that's arched like Nina Dobrev's. FML

Today, I was hit in the face by the placenta of a cow that had just given birth. FML


I agree, your life sucks (49765) - you deserved it (5492)

On 05/31/2014 at 9:53pm - animals - by disturbed - Ireland

Today, things got so bad with my mother-in-law that I seriously considered faking my entire family's deaths to escape it all. FML


I agree, your life sucks (39750) - you deserved it (4573)

On 05/30/2014 at 6:33pm - misc - by save me (man) - Belgium (Antwerpen)

Today, my 15-year-old son got so enraged at a fly that kept harassing him, that he ended up slapping himself in the face as it flew by him. This caused him to fall out of his chair, at which point he broke down into a mess of tears, humiliating me in front of everyone. FML


I agree, your life sucks (44153) - you deserved it (10246)

On 05/30/2014 at 4:37pm - kids - by get a grip, son (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I told my girlfriend that I love her. She panicked and blurted out our S&M safeword. FML


I agree, your life sucks (49975) - you deserved it (6852)

On 05/26/2014 at 11:53am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, in the middle of my boyfriend finally giving me an orgasm, I had an anxiety attack, which caused him to have an attack of his own. I guess there is such a thing as having too much in common with your partner. FML


I agree, your life sucks (55396) - you deserved it (7273)

On 05/20/2014 at 12:31pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Singapore

Today, at my job at a fast-food restaurant, I once again got called into the men's bathroom to break up sex between two homeless people. FML


Today, I had to call a plumber out, because my idiot daughter clogged the pipes while trying to flush a hamburger down the toilet. FML


I agree, your life sucks (41750) - you deserved it (6774)

On 05/17/2014 at 1:30pm - misc - by her mom raised her (man) - Mexico

Today, I started watching porn in my room with the volume muted. A minute later, my dad knocked on the door, so I closed everything and called him in. He just said, "Son, you disgust me." and walked out. Now I'm too paranoid to use my own computer. FML


I agree, your life sucks (51342) - you deserved it (14425)

On 05/16/2014 at 6:25pm - intimacy - by wtf (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I received yet another rejection letter from a college I'd applied to. After crying for a week about how lousy I felt, my older sister gave me all 6 of the acceptance letters she'd been hiding. Turns out she's been forging rejection letters and keeping the real ones in her room. FML


I agree, your life sucks (71165) - you deserved it (5290)

On 05/15/2014 at 1:40am - misc - by livingamongtheflowers - United States

Today, my daughter was scared to go to the bathroom because she thought there was a person behind the shower curtain. There actually was a person behind the shower curtain. FML


I agree, your life sucks (63131) - you deserved it (5387)

On 05/12/2014 at 1:17am - kids - by kids -

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