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artsyphan

Offline (the 11/21/2014 at 9:41am) | Search for a member

artsyphan

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  • Number of visits : 157
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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artsyphan's page activity

Visits<b>Noah98</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 11:36am<b>lameuser</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 12:36am<b>katie_xoxo3</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 9:44pm<b>Random_Princess</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 7:31pm<b>rabechan</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 12:16pm<b>rpsrascal</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 12:15am<b>712sash</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 2:07am<b>xfireds</b> - the 04/18/2014 at 10:39am

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artsyphan's favorite FMLs

Today, my son got a beating. Apparently, he went to a club, waited until he saw a couple of girls pulling a duckface for a photo, then rushed over and threw pieces of bread at them. Their boyfriends, not too surprisingly, didn't appreciate this. I had to drive the idiot home from the hospital. FML

#21190541
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42989) - you deserved it (6133)

On 06/27/2014 at 5:15pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, some alarm, somewhere in my house, is making a low battery noise. I've checked every smoke detector multiple times, and I can't find it. It has been hours. I'm not sure if its still doing it or if the sound has just invaded my brain. FML

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend shrieking at the top of his lungs. I ran into the dining room where he was, to find him standing on the table screaming "Kill it!" while pointing at an unmoving spider the size of a Tic Tac on the wall. FML

#21167015
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43748) - you deserved it (6262)

On 06/08/2014 at 11:10am - love - by eightleggedtictac - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend wanted to make breakfast. Since I usually do all the cooking, I said that was fine. Four hours later, my boyfriend and I were sitting on the sidewalk across the street as the firemen sprayed down the burnt remains of our kitchen. FML

#21166627
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51635) - you deserved it (6774)

On 06/07/2014 at 11:22pm - misc - by Un1ucky (woman) - United States

Today, I came down with diarrhea thanks to a particularly low-class restaurant. My dad has been making constant stupid puns like "pretty shitty state you're in" and "this day and age, you just don't expect this crap". I'm at the point where I want to gouge his eyes out with a goddamn spoon. FML

#21153372
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39734) - you deserved it (6983)

On 05/27/2014 at 1:04pm - health - by fuckmuppet (man) - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)

Today, I told my 4-year-old neighbor that I'm pregnant. His response was to attack me with a stick "for swallowing a baby." Three people had to pull him off. FML

#21145558
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45779) - you deserved it (5292)

On 05/19/2014 at 8:00pm - kids - by Baby eater - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I cut my finger open with a spoon. After waiting for 4 hours in the emergency room, the doctor told me I was missing too much flesh to qualify for stitches. He then called 2 other doctors in to examine it. Apparently they had a contest for patient with most ridiculous injury. I won. FML

#6036159
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33336) - you deserved it (7117)

On 10/28/2009 at 4:03am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was walking on a path through a park by myself. I glanced at the ground and saw a shadow behind me. Thinking of an attacker, I screamed as loud as I could and began flailing my arms to ward him off. Turns out, it was a jogger. He had to stop due to his uncontrollable laughter. FML

#2649932
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11759) - you deserved it (49583)

On 06/06/2009 at 12:43am - misc - by paranoid (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was at a pool party. My friend's little sister pushed me in the pool. When I got out, I pushed her in. She started screaming, and I started laughing because I thought she was pissed that I pushed her in. That wasn't why she was screaming. She can't swim. Her whole family witnessed it. FML

#937193
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47295) - you deserved it (18423)

On 04/12/2009 at 8:24pm - misc - by imbx (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, a car was waiting for me to cross the street so I thought it would be funny to slowly limp across the street. When I got to the end, I jumped as high as I could to show I was faking. Turns out I tripped and hit my head hard on the sidewalk. That car took me to the hospital. FML

#820879
364 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20036) - you deserved it (257809)

On 04/05/2009 at 5:39pm - misc - by funnyguyNOT (man) - United States



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