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artchick5

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  • Number of visits : 848
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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artchick5's favorite FMLs

Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend and told him how smitten I was with him. He responded by giving me a wedgie. FML

#15945280
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26974) - you deserved it (6464)

On 04/27/2011 at 2:54am - love - by :( -

Today, I promised my boyfriend a blow job every time he does the dishes. Every dish in the house has been washed three times already. FML

#15718627
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19273) - you deserved it (65865)

On 04/10/2011 at 1:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I walked in on one of my housemates pissing in the kitchen sink full of dirty dishes. FML

#15442986
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39320) - you deserved it (3499)

On 03/23/2011 at 12:56am - misc - by anon -

Today, I looked in my mouse's cage and noticed a tiny weed growing. I've been trying to grow a garden for years to no avail. Even my mouse is a better gardener than I am. FML

#15104344
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22495) - you deserved it (9925)

On 02/24/2011 at 6:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my sister lost a leg. Immediately after hearing the news, my boyfriend started cracking jokes about getting her a job at IHOP. FML

Today, I was at the dentist's, getting my teeth cleaned. He thought it would be funny to suddenly go on in detail about the fantastic sex he and his wife had the night before. I was unable to speak the entire time. The dentist is my grandpa. FML

#14325141
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39277) - you deserved it (3206)

On 12/24/2010 at 4:14pm - intimacy - by notsoclean (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to the mall with my daughter. She asked me if she could go see Santa, so I said yes. She made me sit on his lap with her, and that's when I felt something on my bum. Let's just say Santa had a present for me. FML

#14263079
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37491) - you deserved it (5940)

On 12/19/2010 at 7:23pm - intimacy - by hotmommy -

Today, I caught my daughter attempting to stick pencils up our cat's butt. FML

#14029442
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38040) - you deserved it (4773)

On 11/29/2010 at 10:03pm - kids - by Laura -

Today, while I was having sex with my girlfriend, I was struck with a white-hot pain, and in the confusion thought her vagina had contracted hard. It turned out it was actually my uncircumcised penis retracting for the first time in my life. FML

#13975115
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24740) - you deserved it (6902)

On 11/25/2010 at 1:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Singapore

Today, I realized that 95% of my facebook friends added me only because they think my sisters are hot. FML

#13944368
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28946) - you deserved it (4033)

On 11/23/2010 at 12:22am - misc - by smallfrie32 -

Today, my sixteen year old son told me that he's following his guidance counselor's advice: to do what his hero does for a living. The problem? His hero is SpongeBob Squarepants. His ambition in life is to become a fry cook. FML

#13753652
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24925) - you deserved it (4057)

On 11/07/2010 at 3:15pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my boyfriend said he wants a Hello Kitty wedding. FML

#13559273
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36978) - you deserved it (8555)

On 10/23/2010 at 5:07am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my parents told me I was adopted. I can understand parents waiting for a child to be old enough to understand, but I'm 33 years old. FML

#13455884
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31367) - you deserved it (2238)

On 10/15/2010 at 4:05am - misc - by anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had to use my butthole to negotiate with my husband so I can get a new tattoo. FML

#12753768
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13694) - you deserved it (47775)

On 08/26/2010 at 9:32am - intimacy - by H8TR (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to give blood for the first time. When I sat down the guy said "First time?" I told him yes and he replied "Me too." FML

#12631880
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33210) - you deserved it (3420)

On 08/19/2010 at 8:39pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)



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