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artchick5
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artchick5's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend clearly stated that I was "useless" when on my period. FML

#18108138
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28971) - you deserved it (6907)

On 10/30/2011 at 1:02am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I came home to find that my house had been broken into. The items stolen were my PS3, cell phone, laptop, tablets, and for some reason my deodorant and pillowcases as well. FML

#17974360
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23379) - you deserved it (1885)

On 10/13/2011 at 10:41am - misc - by pillowless (woman) - United States

Today, I was playing video games at 2am. My guinea pig started squealing at me, and wouldn't stop until I turned out the lights and got into bed. I'm 20 years old, and I've let a rodent dictate my bedtime. FML

#17911621
304 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20462) - you deserved it (15232)

On 10/05/2011 at 2:58pm - animals - by Beeisc00l - Reserved

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting frisky. She got my cock out, stopped, and told me it looked like "Rufus the naked mole rat." She spent the next 20 minutes showing me pictures, describing in detail why they looked similar, and laughing. FML

#17889582
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28397) - you deserved it (3695)

On 10/02/2011 at 6:57pm - intimacy - by rufusthepenis - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)

Today, my girlfriend changed her relationship status on Facebook to 'It's Complicated' because I didn't give her my last cookie. This happens all the time. FML

#17859546
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27582) - you deserved it (10501)

On 09/28/2011 at 10:28pm - love - by danthecomplicate - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my fiancé played Rockband drums from the bathroom while taking a crap. He actually managed to properly hit notes. FML

#17690581
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18648) - you deserved it (3594)

On 09/07/2011 at 7:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I approached my daughter and told her she needs to clean her room. Her response was, "Thank you Captain Obvious." She's 4. FML

#17670632
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22043) - you deserved it (7129)

On 09/05/2011 at 1:04pm - kids - by kidswithnomanners (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I got into a fight with my boyfriend. The only thing he could think of to cheer me up was to give me "permission" to give him a blowjob. FML

#17429477
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29864) - you deserved it (5980)

On 08/10/2011 at 1:47pm - intimacy - by noway - Singapore

Today, I met my new roommate. She severely struggled with pronouncing my name, and decided that to save time and the effort, she's just going to call me what she thinks my name sounds like: Lube. FML

#17379183
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18333) - you deserved it (2087)

On 08/05/2011 at 4:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was discussing the traffic with my brother. He said the most common car colour is red. I said it was black. We ended up betting €100 on which three vehicles of either colour would pass by our house first. It seems a convoy of fire trucks had somewhere to be in a hurry. FML

#17221659
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24848) - you deserved it (8102) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/22/2011 at 8:52pm - money - by zerom - France

Today, I woke up to a scream downstairs. My 13 year-old daughter was trying to bite her little brother's neck. No matter how hard I try, she will not believe that she is NOT and NEVER WILL BE a vampire. FML

#17162129
471 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32664) - you deserved it (4408)

On 07/18/2011 at 11:17am - kids - by xBubbles38 - United States

Today, I woke up to a scream downstairs. My 13 year-old daughter was trying to bite her little brother's neck. No matter how hard I try, she will not believe that she is NOT and NEVER WILL BE a vampire. FML

#17162129
471 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32664) - you deserved it (4408)

On 07/18/2011 at 11:17am - kids - by xBubbles38 - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me using the "it's not you, it's me" speech with a slight variation, saying instead, "It's not me, it's you. And yes, I meant to say it that way round." FML

#17076544
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23307) - you deserved it (4261)

On 07/12/2011 at 3:14am - love - by Jackie Campbell - United States (Colorado)

Today, my mom took me to a counselor because of my addiction to watermelon. FML

#16990029
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29133) - you deserved it (5081)

On 07/05/2011 at 6:28pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I got pulled over. Suspicious that I'd been drinking, the police officer made me walk a straight line and recite the alphabet. I failed both. I was completely sober. FML



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