Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

arsinic

Offline (2 hours ago) | Search for a member

arsinic

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1129
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About arsinic : The elusive ArSinic can often be found lurking on the walls of FML and LOLpics, finding stupid puns and pictures of baby animals for amusement. If you ever cross it's path, the only chance for survival would be to soil yourself or offer it pizza.

arsinic's page activity

Visits<b>Hieroglyph</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 3:16pm<b>MrKronos</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 2:51pm<b>riddle143</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 1:32pm<b>DiJsLifeStyle</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 1:30pm<b>adrian1910</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 12:02pm<b>LillithWolf</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 11:45am<b>LunaaBluee</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 11:28am<b>Raleaf</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 11:25am<b>tagallopes</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 11:06am<b>JuzReading</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 9:38am<b>opnionation</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 12:36am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 03/25/2014 at 11:13pm<b>k_gils</b> - the 11/21/2013 at 10:04pm<b>roro_superloser</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 1:01am<b>Pesticides</b> - the 07/11/2013 at 1:06am<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 07/09/2013 at 8:36pm<b>xicebearx</b> - the 12/25/2012 at 11:19am

Liked!<b>LillithWolf</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 5:47pm

arsinic's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

42

You see, sonny boy, moderating FMLs is a bit like running a marathon.

See all of arsinic's badges

arsinic's favorite FMLs

Today, my neighbor called the police for the seventh time because he's convinced I'm a vampire. He's also gotten in the habit of leaving garlic cloves in my yard. My parents come next week. FML

#21095586
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38155) - you deserved it (2923)

On 03/24/2014 at 9:52pm - misc - by Vampprobs - United States (Michigan)

Today, a tiny worm was wriggling across the screen of my Mac laptop. I tried to wipe it away with my thumb, but it just kept crawling. Turns out the worm lives *inside* my screen, beneath the glass. FML

#21092367
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41976) - you deserved it (4257)

On 03/21/2014 at 1:14am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my mom decided to follow me during my driving test. She rear ended me. FML

#21092226
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42053) - you deserved it (3023)

On 03/20/2014 at 11:04pm - misc - by nehadrihan - United States (California)

Today, while I thought I'd never had an orgasm, my doctor informed me that I'm actually having orgasms almost every time I have sex. They just feel like utterly frustrating, slightly painful, unpleasurable and completely unsatisfying muscle contractions. FML

Today, a teenage girl bumped into me and my phone fell out of my hands, and over the Golden Gate Bridge. FML

#21081896
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54694) - you deserved it (5571)

On 03/09/2014 at 1:08am - misc - by Seriously? - United States (California)

Today, my hippy nutjob of a roommate threw a bitch fit at me, all because he saw me chopping down a tree in Minecraft. FML

#21080644
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43066) - you deserved it (4698)

On 03/07/2014 at 4:25pm - misc - by fuck off, eh! (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was in my Honors English class. I sneezed very loudly while my teacher was giving a lecture. I had the genius idea to say, "Sorry, I'm allergic to bullshit." FML

Today, a woman attempted to pickpocket me while trying to educate me about God. FML

Today, every "entry level" job in my field is now requiring 2-5 years experience. I don't think they understand what "entry level" actually means. FML

#21078902
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40015) - you deserved it (3011)

On 03/05/2014 at 4:37pm - work - by mr1234 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I told my husband to give our dog a bath while I was at work. When I returned home, I found my dog, along with my husband, in the bath together. FML

#21074688
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40405) - you deserved it (9347)

On 03/01/2014 at 3:23am - animals - by lacy - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my mom told me all about how I was conceived in a Disney Land toilet. FML

#21070288
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42643) - you deserved it (3753)

On 02/24/2014 at 11:52am - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Dudley)

Today, while driving, I saw a dog run across the road. Feeling sorry for the pup on a cold, rainy night, I pulled my car over to pick it up. Once in, it started freaking out so I turned on the light. It was then that I realized I'd just put a wild coyote on my passenger seat. FML

Today, a guy called customer support, claiming his internet wasn't working. I asked for his customer details, and he gave his name as Mike Hunt. I recognized the old joke, called him an idiot, and hung up on him. It turned out that was his real name. I'm now on suspension. FML

#21060478
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26256) - you deserved it (32234)

On 02/14/2014 at 4:39pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, the boy who sits next to me in class accidentally dropped his sketch pad. It turns out he's really talented at drawing portraits. They're so good that I could recognize myself in all of them. FML

#21058436
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45634) - you deserved it (7089)

On 02/12/2014 at 8:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)



Idan Schneider's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #11
  • Yes, we're late. We've been doing stuff, the New Year and our birthday party got in the way, but there's no excuse. So, we're sorry for not churning out another Best of the Worst in due…

Wednesday 28 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: