Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

arsinic

Offline (40 minutes ago) | Search for a member

arsinic

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2175
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About arsinic : The elusive ArSinic can often be found lurking on the walls of FML and LOLpics, finding stupid puns and pictures of baby animals for amusement. If you ever cross it's path, the only chance for survival would be to soil yourself or offer it pizza.

arsinic's page activity

Visits<b>poopsiepants</b> - the 10/14/2015 at 5:35am<b>pl0xs3rver</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 6:34pm<b>dakatabg</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 1:52pm<b>Hieroglyph</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 3:16pm<b>MrKronos</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 2:51pm<b>riddle143</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 1:32pm<b>DiJsLifeStyle</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 1:30pm<b>adrian1910</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 12:02pm<b>LillithWolf</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 11:45am<b>LunaaBluee</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 11:28am<b>Raleaf</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 11:25am<b>tagallopes</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 11:06am<b>JuzReading</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 9:38am<b>opnionation</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 12:36am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 03/25/2014 at 11:13pm<b>k_gils</b> - the 11/21/2013 at 10:04pm<b>roro_superloser</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 1:01am<b>Pesticides</b> - the 07/11/2013 at 1:06am

Fucked!<b>poopsiepants</b> - the 10/14/2015 at 11:35am<b>pl0xs3rver</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 1:53am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 7:54pm<b>LillithWolf</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 5:47pm

arsinic's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of arsinic's badges

arsinic's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to fire an employee due to his staggering incompetence. The moment I said the F-word, he started fake-coughing, then loudly humming, then went to his desk and pretended not to hear anything I was saying. It took 3 of us to drag him out of the building kicking and screaming. FML

#21456323
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25247) - you deserved it (1830)

On 08/15/2015 at 11:47am - work - by bruised - United States (Florida)

Today, it's been 2 days since my boyfriend "accidentally" slipped into the wrong hole while continuing to hammer me at full speed. I still can't poop or even walk right. FML

#21456278
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33421) - you deserved it (4609)

On 08/15/2015 at 5:32am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my psycho ex got into my wedding ceremony and attacked my wife. FML

#21455220
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33307) - you deserved it (2328)

On 08/12/2015 at 1:50pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found my daughter sobbing and trying to stick a wad of gauze to her vagina. She was having her first period. FML

#21453304
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24569) - you deserved it (10540)

On 08/07/2015 at 10:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out why I was always picked up last from school. My parents didn't want the other parents to find out I was their kid. FML

#21449647
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26780) - you deserved it (1982)

On 07/30/2015 at 6:35pm - kids - by Lonely School Kid - Canada

Today, I learned companies can legally lie to fire an employee, and unless anything they say is on record, they are legally correct, no matter how unethical the company is. FML

#21449623
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22545) - you deserved it (1680)

On 07/30/2015 at 5:50pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I just found my husband on Craigslist. He's working away from home, and he's looking to give a blowjob. FML

#21449578
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30052) - you deserved it (2726)

On 07/30/2015 at 3:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, my business got broken into and I lost a lot of valuable equipment. Although I have 24/7 security guards, they left in the middle of the burglary because they were too scared to stop the burglars or even to call the police. FML

#21449035
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28858) - you deserved it (2366)

On 07/29/2015 at 11:30am - money - by fukingtigans (man) - Croatia (Zadarska)

Today, I got punched in the face, had hair ripped out of my skull and broke a tooth on the pavement when I fell. Some guy mistook me for someone else. FML

#21436269
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27957) - you deserved it (1648)

On 07/04/2015 at 9:18am - misc - by Zizi (woman) - Norway (Nordland)

Today, after replacing several components on my new used car, I realized that the reason it wasn't getting the gas mileage it was supposed to because my coworkers take turns siphoning my gas while I work. FML

#21435168
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27136) - you deserved it (1651)

On 07/02/2015 at 12:16am - work - by thatshelpful - United States (Iowa)

Today, I had to call a parent and tell them that their special needs daughter is pregnant. FML

#21430924
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33929) - you deserved it (2016)

On 06/23/2015 at 11:16pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at my sister's wedding, she and I had a plan that she would purposely throw the bouquet to my girlfriend, then I would propose in front of everyone. When the bouquet landed in my girlfriend's lap, she screamed, "Ew, no way" and threw it to someone else. FML

#21430908
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32222) - you deserved it (3448)

On 06/23/2015 at 10:48pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my neighbor's son siphoned the fuel out of my lawn mower and put it in his car. What he didn't realize is that the fuel mixture I use in my lawn mower would ruin his car engine. His dad says it's my fault and actually insists I should pay his pissant son's repair bill. FML

#21425373
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35815) - you deserved it (1984)

On 06/13/2015 at 8:42am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my mom found my weed stash and went berserk, grounding me and saying she's going to have my bedroom door removed. Less than an hour later, I found her laughing and smoking the same stash with my dad in the backyard. FML

#21421662
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28891) - you deserved it (9233)

On 06/06/2015 at 5:11am - misc - by lehonX9 (man) - Germany (Niedersachsen)

Today, I took my girlfriend home to introduce her to my parents. As we arrived, my grandpa was leaving the bathroom. He looked over at my girlfriend with a worried expression and said "Never take a shit in this place! Feels like I wiped my arsehole with sandpaper." FML

#21421640
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27482) - you deserved it (2637)

On 06/06/2015 at 3:32am - work - by justin bieber's nutsack (woman) - United Kingdom



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: