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ark44

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ark44
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  • Number of visits : 32
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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ark44's last visitors

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ark44's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

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ark44's favorite FMLs

Today, for our anniversary, I sang my boyfriend a heartfelt, self-written song. The first thing he said when I finished was "Your fly is open." FML

#21046895
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37999) - you deserved it (5145)

On 02/01/2014 at 3:11am - love - by zippersaremoreimportantthansentiments (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I saw a pink, slimy thing coming out of my dog's knob. I got really freaked out so I took him to the vet, only to find out that it was his penis. FML

#16926272
327 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7704) - you deserved it (53447)

On 06/30/2011 at 7:08pm - health - by budbunny13 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to a theater and saw "Bruno" with my mom. We saw "Borat" together, so I thought, 'Hey, how bad could it be?' I don't know what was more nauseating: Bruno's penis spinning around and talking or the fact that my mom thought it was hilarious and couldn't stop laughing. FML

#4111292
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27718) - you deserved it (22110)

On 07/28/2009 at 4:38pm - misc - by porkfriedlife - United States

Today, I was at a window seat on a bus full of people when I saw a person lying motionless in a gutter. I jumped up, nearly hysterical, screaming for the driver to stop because there was a guy really hurt on the road. An emergency stop and huge commotion ensued. It turned out to be some garbage. FML

Today, while showering in my dorm, a hand reaches through the curtain and grabs my ass. I hit the person on the other side of the curtain. He opened the curtain thinking that I was his girlfriend. He apologized and he had sex with his girlfriend in the shower stall next to me. FML

#268539
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64494) - you deserved it (2733)

On 03/11/2009 at 3:37am - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my four-year-old cousin gave me a hug, basically stuffing his face into my crotch. Then he pulled it out and said "Ew, that's stinky" in front of my entire class. FML

#70656
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43721) - you deserved it (10846)

On 02/18/2009 at 6:27pm - kids - by girlmeetsworld - United States (New York)

Today, I withdrew $120 from the ATM at the hotel I'm staying at, only to have no money come out. When I talked to the concierge, who witnessed the whole thing, she said it had been happening all day and that the machine was broken. My bank says it's the hotel's problem, and the hotel says it's the bank's problem. Either way, I'm out $120. FML

#844
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25552) - you deserved it (1500)

On 01/04/2009 at 12:24am - money - by - Sent from mobile version



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