Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About ariannaa : Hi I'm Arianna(:
I don't want to be to specific so you get to know 16 random facts about me, starting....................NOW!
1. I'm left handed
2. I lied about where I live
3. I have 3 sisters, no brothers
4. I am sixteen years young as of 8/28/11
5. I wear multiple barcelets on my wrists
6. one of the bracelets is a lady gaga bracelet but i don't like lady gaga i just like what it says which is dance in the dark
7. my favorite color is green
8. I love Harry Potter
9. Twilight sucks
10. I have a facebook
11. I like getting random missions from mystery seeker
12. I don't have a pet unless you count my a rock
13. I am the middle child
14. I love to dress up
15. I listen to alotta different kinds of music
16. I'm running out of things to say so just ask me if you wanna know anything :)
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today, my girlfriend who was planning on waiting until marriage for sex decided to have sex with me. It's been 4 hours and she hasn't stopped crying, praying and calling me the devil's temptation. FML
Today, I was jamming out in my car, tapping my fingers on the wheel and bobbing my head. At the next stoplight, I happened to look over and the passenger of the car next to me was holding a sign in the window saying, "I bet you don't have a boyfriend, do you?" FML
Today, my girlfriend's ex punched me so hard in the face, I couldn't see straight. But I got up anyway. I lunged at him, and nailed him in the jaw. Turns out I'd in fact just knocked out my girlfriend the on-looker. FML
Today, my son called me from medical school, asking for a new phone. Why? Because he dropped it in the toilet. How? Trying to videotape his anus while taking a dump. I pay $80,000 a year just to hear he took a dump on his phone. FML
Today, I began to walk across the street when I saw a very familiar old lady struggle across it. I walked over to help her, and only after she had blown her rape whistle and socked me in the nuts did she realize I was her grandson. FML
Today, in science, we were studying reproduction. Our teacher was reading out the notes and claimed that 'the female's penis stiffens to enter the male's vagina.' I'm supposed to be learning stuff from this woman. FML
Today, my boyfriend of five years proposed to me in front of my entire family. He later confessed that it was part of a dare with his friends because, "There was no way you'd say yes." Guess who has to explain this to all my relatives? FML