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aprilita

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aprilita
  • Town/Country : El Paso, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2878
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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aprilita's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

#17727595
390 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80448) - you deserved it (11868)

On 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by IbetIgotAIDS (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I went to visit my alcoholic father. He remembered to ask me how my dog Reggie is, but could not remember the name of "my pal." My "pal" is also my wife of four years. FML

#17674515
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21204) - you deserved it (1846)

On 09/05/2011 at 9:03pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my grandmother pulled down her pants and screamed, "Kiss my ass" in the middle of a packed restaurant. FML

#17669006
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27325) - you deserved it (2567)

On 09/05/2011 at 9:00am - misc - by Brie - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was digging in the backyard when my mom came out, nodded her head approvingly, and with a straight face told me it was good practice for when I inevitably go to prison. FML

#17661363
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22756) - you deserved it (3848)

On 09/04/2011 at 1:05pm - work - by mike - United States

Today, at work, my boss stared at me from behind while I made hand gestures and noises at a toaster. I was pretending to be Magneto. FML

#17642045
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8102) - you deserved it (27164)

On 09/02/2011 at 3:48am - work - by dragos_dgt (man) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I asked my Dad if it was true that my mother had a C-section at my birth. He replied "Yeah, so technically you weren't even born, you were surgically removed, like a tumor." FML

#17638273
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31997) - you deserved it (4152)

On 09/01/2011 at 7:40pm - misc - by mannydanny (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, I was chased on my bike by a couple of guys in a car. I rode into a public park to cut through and try to lose them. I looked by to check if they were following me, but they had to stop. I laughed, looked forward, and rammed into a little girl. FML

#17565560
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24622) - you deserved it (8286)

On 08/24/2011 at 2:34am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I applied to live in a barn. FML

#17554659
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20910) - you deserved it (7424)

On 08/23/2011 at 1:39am - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML

#17499822
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31068) - you deserved it (6407)

On 08/17/2011 at 12:40pm - misc - by EmbarrassedGirlfriend101 - United States

Today, a man with a face like a corpse's shoe started talking to me in the long queue at the Post Office. Apparently, his mother invented the banana, and he's first in line for the throne in France if ever Prince Harry dies. And his breath smelled like Satan's ass gas. FML

#17496000
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25387) - you deserved it (3088)

On 08/17/2011 at 12:48am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I heard that a boy in my class had written a song about me. Intrigued, I went to see him perform. I spent 3 excruciating minutes listening to a song about 'the girl of his dreams', his tear-filled eyes staring into mine the whole time. I have to sit next to this freak for the next 2 years. FML

#17488999
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13623) - you deserved it (47479)

On 08/16/2011 at 9:20am - love - by worried (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, our cleaning lady's son came to our house claiming that his mother had died of a heart attack. We gave him her entire month's salary as well as some extra money. A few hours later, our cleaning lady turned up for work. Turns out she doesn't have a son. FML

#17476916
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31676) - you deserved it (19532)

On 08/15/2011 at 1:45am - money - by duped (woman) - Pakistan (Punjab)

Today, I woke up at my girlfriend's house. She was staring at me, holding a knife over my face. She ran away, giggling. FML

#17457057
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37431) - you deserved it (4053)

On 08/13/2011 at 2:37am - love - by bTOhno - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my father tricked me into eating a Tasmanian habanero, saying it was just another pepper. The burning in my mouth was unbearable, but nothing compared to when I took a shit later in the day. FML

#17450169
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27043) - you deserved it (4078)

On 08/12/2011 at 1:25pm - misc - by Coldsnap - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my friend and I went for a late night walk along the beach. We decided to sit down on a log. It was a dead seal. FML

#17447833
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39067) - you deserved it (5894)

On 08/12/2011 at 3:44am - animals - by squishylog - United States (California)



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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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