Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 8726
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

aprilita's page activity

Visits<b>thatoneguy255</b> - the 08/27/2016 at 10:31pm<b>metal1245</b> - the 08/11/2016 at 10:16pm<b>SarahJanexo</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 11:26am<b>BestOrginalName</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 8:56am<b>refticon</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 2:23pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 9:36pm<b>heybro19</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 10:20am<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 12:39am<b>HPCullen251</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 4:45pm<b>chloe24601</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 4:01am<b>FlendtDK</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 8:36pm<b>Jujuboo_3</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 4:38am<b>QueenOfSuppness</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 3:42am<b>brucewayne14</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 8:15am<b>zanoty</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 11:12pm<b>reezy1978</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 6:31pm<b>alexiah</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 1:20pm<b>lisaint</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 6:10am

Fucked!<b>refticon</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 8:23pm

aprilita's FML badges

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of aprilita's badges

aprilita's favorite FMLs

Today, I met this really attractive guy who introduced himself as Wyan. He was really cool and sweet and we got along pretty well. Then someone informed me that his name is Ryan and that he has a speech impediment, AFTER I had been referring to him as Wyan for quite some time. FML

by hellosaila / 02/27/2009 at 2:58am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I was at the beach with my buddy. Messing around, he swam up behind me and dunked me under the water. Naturally, moments later I swam behind him, grabbed both his ankles and stood up, flipping him completely, only to see him watching me from a few feet away. I flipped a 70 year old man. FML

by beachbum / 02/27/2009 at 1:03am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try anal sex. When he was done, I turned around to see him holding a strap-on with a smile on his face and said 'Now, do me'. FML

by Picaresque / 02/26/2009 at 12:57pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, my guy friend and I were in his dorm room watching a movie when he started kissing me. Things heated up so we moved things over to his bed. He was on me when a hand shoots down from his top bunk. His roommate had been up there the whole time and he wanted a high-five. So they high-fived. FML

by Menareidiots / 02/24/2009 at 6:32pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I was pissing in a urinal and I had the urge to sneeze. Unable to hold it, I sneezed and hit my head on a metal beam supporting the urinal. In complete disarray, I had to step back from the urinal while pissing and managed to spray the floor, the wall, and the person next to me. FML

by iliketurtles / 02/24/2009 at 5:57pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I arrived at my parents house for dinner. When I got there, I noticed that they had gay pride flags hanging from the porch, and gay rights bumper stickers plastered to their cars. There was also a huge "We accept you, Nick" banner hanging from the garage. I'M NOT GAY! FML

by Nick / 02/22/2009 at 10:04pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the doctor with my parents. When the doctor asked if I was sexually active, I said 'Yes.' My mom laughed and said 'Good one.' My dad, for added effect said, 'Your hand doesn't count.' FML

by Nails / 02/21/2009 at 10:16pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, during a text conversation with a girl I've been trying to get with, she complained about how crummy of a day she was having. I told her it couldn't be as bad as she thought, and she would probably get it over it soon. Then she told me she had found out her cousin had been murdered. FML

by schellbytheseashore / 02/21/2009 at 2:30am / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, my friend had a Coke can on his desk in class. It was empty but I was thirsty so I picked it up thinking I could try to get that little bit of Coke always left at the bottom. When I took a sip I found out he had been picking his fingernails and putting them in the can. FML

by Thatkid / 02/18/2009 at 9:29am / Singapore / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally hooked up with a boy I really liked. We were lying in bed and my panties were already off when he asked me : "Would you also have sex with me if you weren't drunk?". I responded "Yes!" and asked him the same question, at which he responded : "No, probably not." FML

by Dannylover / 02/17/2009 at 3:53pm / Netherlands (Noord-Holland) / Intimacy

Today, I cancelled out of a video chat with my boyfriend to go take a dump. I took my computer with me to look at Facebook. It took three minutes for me to realize I was still on video chat. FML

by videochat / 02/14/2009 at 6:05pm / United States (Vermont) / Geek

Today, I was talking to my parents about feeling insecure with my "beach body" as Spring Break keeps getting closer and closer. My dad warned me by saying, "Don't wear a gray swimsuit. People will try to roll you back into the ocean". FML

by Shamu / 02/13/2009 at 7:15pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm in Spain, and told the kids with whom I will be working that I was excited to be working with them. Only the form of excitement I used apparently refers to sexual excitement. Basically, I told the kids I was sexually aroused to be working with them. FML

by thegoldenboy3 / 02/12/2009 at 7:14am / Spain (Andalucia) / Intimacy

Today, I drove my girlfriend home around 11 to her garage where we start to have sex. When she comes to climax she slips and hits her head. Her parents heard the crash and came down, we were both still naked and she was unconscious. FML

by douglisk1994 / 02/09/2009 at 7:07pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, I accidentally unplugged my headphones in the quiet section of the library, causing my music to play from my laptop at full volume. I was listening to Celine Dion. I'm the captain of the football team. FML

by misc / 02/07/2009 at 9:31pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous