applexj

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Offline (the 01/04/2015 at 2:45pm)

applexj

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1041
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About applexj : Hello, I like to play hockey

applexj's page activity

Visits<b>Larissa24</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 11:12pm<b>PaigeLeeAnn11</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 12:21pm<b>HVAkicker99</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 10:35pm<b>0987654321123465</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 10:05pm<b>thelittlemissy</b> - the 02/07/2014 at 11:41am<b>awilliams44</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 8:19pm<b>leeebeeeee18</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 12:13pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 7:31am<b>barak263</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 7:16am<b>Jessica0928</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 5:21am<b>NotAPrincess</b> - the 01/24/2014 at 9:25pm<b>_ansley_2013</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 6:23am<b>fay32</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 2:41pm<b>chelene</b> - the 12/29/2013 at 5:47pm<b>Kibaruto</b> - the 12/27/2013 at 2:40pm<b>October3461</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 4:18am<b>cmbar831</b> - the 12/24/2013 at 9:39am<b>KatlynBrooke</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 5:38am

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applexj's favorite FMLs

Today, my roommate stumbled in drunk at 5am with 3 Big Macs, and passed out on the floor after eating them. This happens almost every night. I stay in, study, work, and go to the gym almost everyday. And she still has better grades, a better body, and makes more money than me. FML

by apparentlythereisnokarma / 01/01/2013 at 4:00pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dog died and I told my grandfather I wanted her to be cremated. I came home later to find him burning her in our barbecue pit. FML

by psd60 / 12/06/2012 at 2:18am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, my girlfriend accused me of cheating, because I tipped our waitress at dinner. FML

by Anonymous / 12/01/2012 at 12:59am / United States (Missouri) / Love

Today, my dad grounded me for two weeks for profusely swearing at my misbehaving laptop. After some arguing, he actually accepted my half-joking offer to play a game of CoD over it. His condition was that if I lost, my grounding period would double. We played. He kicked my ass. FML

by goodbye cruel world / 11/30/2012 at 8:28pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friends and I were playing truth or dare game. It was late and we were drunk, so they dared me to run naked into my neighbor's yard while yelling, "Help! The pixies took my penis!" I ran screaming right into their big family reunion. FML

by nekkidness / 11/21/2012 at 4:06pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, a nearby volcano erupted for the second time. We were all urged to keep our windows and doors closed in case of ash clouds. My father responded by opening every window and door and shouting, "Come at me, bro!" FML

Today, I had to take my little brother to the pool. He acted like a brat the whole time, and when I told him we were leaving, he ran away, slipped, and hit his face on the tile floor. He told my dad and step-mom I punched him. They believed him, and I'm grounded for two months. FML

by Anonymous / 11/17/2012 at 7:41pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, I had to tell my 7 year old son it's not polite to jack off in public. FML

by Gothicbunnyx3 / 02/20/2012 at 8:43pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I had a dream that I was trying to pop a balloon. Nothing I did was working, so I put it between my knees and tried to pop it that way. Immediately, I woke up to the sound of frantic hissing and meowing. As it turns out, I was trying to pop the cat. FML

by furryballoon / 11/21/2011 at 11:46pm / United States (Washington) / Animals

Today, after a great night of sexual pleasure, I ran to answer the door. The angry woman standing there introduced herself. ''Hi, I'm your neighbor. My seven year old son's bedroom is just next to yours and when you scream at night he gets scared. Do you think you could keep it down?'' FML

by kmb04 / 08/02/2009 at 11:12am / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy

Today, bouncing at a local bar. I I.D.'d a girl with a group of people. I told her that next time she used a fake I.D., she at least should get one with a picture that looked like her. She started crying and ran off. A guy told me that she had been in a car wreck, and had been badly disfigured. FML

by tsardaukar / 04/01/2009 at 12:51pm / United States (Maine) / Work