Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

apaloosa

Offline (4 hours ago) | Search for a member

apaloosa

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 601
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About apaloosa : ^ you want it don't you?

apaloosa's page activity

Visits<b>GotItWow</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 9:45pm<b>LolliDolly</b> - the 02/28/2014 at 12:18pm<b>Demonking</b> - the 02/10/2014 at 7:47am<b>BauerMegan</b> - the 11/05/2013 at 9:53pm<b>randomgirl4728</b> - the 08/10/2013 at 7:54pm<b>dchaslow1</b> - the 07/15/2013 at 1:23am<b>UnvalidMistakes</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 9:18pm<b>lukian</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 12:48pm<b>arleenxo</b> - the 07/10/2013 at 2:16am<b>BenignSociopath</b> - the 07/09/2013 at 10:45pm<b>miss_chriss</b> - the 07/09/2013 at 10:32pm<b>alllisonnn</b> - the 07/09/2013 at 10:09pm<b>cherries62212</b> - the 07/09/2013 at 5:35pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 07/09/2013 at 5:16pm<b>straww</b> - the 06/28/2013 at 3:15am<b>kenzieiscarson</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 12:46pm<b>Wiringify</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 7:39am<b>ja2006</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 3:37am

apaloosa's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of apaloosa's badges

apaloosa's favorite FMLs

Today, I complimented a guy on his beard. His response? "Thanks. Wanna sit on it?" FML

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

#21245451
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50631) - you deserved it (9735)

On 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm - health - by whotouchedyou1 - United States (Texas)

Today, my best friend went in for her scheduled mammogram, and I sent her a text saying, "How're your boobies?" It was only after I sent it that I realized I'd sent it to my history professor. FML

#20930198
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38738) - you deserved it (11504)

On 10/22/2013 at 12:47pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my grandmother called me in a fit of panic because her new neighbors are black. So is my fiancé, whom she is supposed to meet tomorrow. FML

#20921768
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46075) - you deserved it (4605)

On 10/15/2013 at 5:43pm - misc - by secretsmakefriends (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my 10-year-old son told my 5-year-old daughter that we're a ghost family, and told her to run through our glass door to see for herself. She believed it, ran straight into the door, and ended up having to be taken to hospital. FML

#20813979
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54540) - you deserved it (5243)

On 07/31/2013 at 7:19pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Falkirk)

Today, my aunt had the wonderful experience of hearing my boyfriend and I have a very "satisfying" encounter after we stupidly forgot to turn off the baby monitor. FML

#20772295
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30188) - you deserved it (45233)

On 07/09/2013 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by embarrassed niece (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, on my first day at my new job delivering pizzas, I got bit by a guy dressed as Dracula. FML

#20750993
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41056) - you deserved it (2959)

On 06/27/2013 at 7:15pm - work - by keiran123 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, while running, a man ran up next to me and started jogging with me. He asked if he could run with me and I said yes. Later, when I told him I was going home, he followed me home. When I asked him to leave, he say down on my lawn in protest. He has been there for over 4 hours. FML

#20738304
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51219) - you deserved it (7728)

On 06/21/2013 at 12:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my mother came into my workplace to wail on me for "ruining our family's reputation" because I got a girl pregnant. I've been married to the "girl" for 8 years. FML

#20720453
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58729) - you deserved it (2896)

On 06/11/2013 at 10:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, while packing for a trip, my mom bumped my bag and it started to vibrate. She flew into a huge rage calling me all sorts of colourful names, thinking it was a sex toy. It was my tooth brush. FML

#20649670
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70154) - you deserved it (5175)

On 05/08/2013 at 10:44am - intimacy - by oops - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out that my wife is having an affair with the same guy my ex-wife left me for. FML

#20645479
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (88264) - you deserved it (5519)

On 05/06/2013 at 2:13pm - love - by Anonymous - Ireland (Donegal)

Today, I was violently throwing up due to severe morning sickness. My boyfriend looked at me, then turned and walked away. In the end, my daughter gave me some paper towel and her juice. My 18-month-old is more supportive of my pregnancy than her 30-year-old father. FML

#20562509
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37724) - you deserved it (5530)

On 03/27/2013 at 3:34pm - misc - by InfamousLastWord (woman) - United States

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why chewing "shit-tons of gum" is not an actual alternative to brushing his teeth. FML

#20546477
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29110) - you deserved it (3173)

On 03/16/2013 at 5:52pm - misc - by Dat Stanky Mouf (woman) - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, my prom dress finally arrived. My prom was yesterday. FML

#20544424
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49313) - you deserved it (6575)

On 03/15/2013 at 3:09am - misc - by ipaid350dollarsfornothing - Qatar



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: