Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

anounyamiss

Search for a member

anounyamiss

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 363
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

anounyamiss's page activity

Visits<b>Kinkykim99</b> - the 01/25/2014 at 5:09pm<b>Bentonic</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 12:29am<b>Jay_Tay97</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 9:48pm

anounyamiss's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

anounyamiss's favorite FMLs

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time, after he repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me. He passed out halfway through. FML

#21002524
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47467) - you deserved it (5732)

On 12/23/2013 at 2:13pm - intimacy - by JoshuasGirl (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, it's been a little over a month since my dad started taking yoga lessons. We always joked around behind his back that he was just doing it so he could get flexible enough to suck himself off. Well, that joke was confirmed as reality when I walked in on him trying just that. FML

#21001267
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49996) - you deserved it (6926)

On 12/22/2013 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by bleach bleach bleach (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, while going down on my girlfriend, she stopped moaning and told me to stop because she couldn't fake it anymore. FML

#21001045
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51718) - you deserved it (14903)

On 12/22/2013 at 3:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. I guess she got bored because she started looking at her nails. FML

#21000013
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42204) - you deserved it (11368)

On 12/21/2013 at 9:13am - intimacy - by anon - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Just as he was about to finish, he pulled out and came in his hand. He then flicked his hand towards my face and yelled, "Sha-ZAM!" FML

#20999459
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53067) - you deserved it (7915)

On 12/20/2013 at 6:36pm - intimacy - by zamwow (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while looking for some socks in my mom's dresser, I found a male g-string and an edible bra. FML

#20996935
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39604) - you deserved it (15085)

On 12/18/2013 at 12:47pm - intimacy - by Rob (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. As he came, he yelled "FIRST, BITCHES!" FML

#20992325
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47929) - you deserved it (8899)

On 12/14/2013 at 1:50pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, my sister brought a guy home while our parents were out. They had sex in her bedroom. I heard everything. The worst part wasn't her stupidly excessive moaning; it was that the moans sounded eerily similar to a cow mooing. FML

#20991588
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49710) - you deserved it (4560)

On 12/13/2013 at 7:34pm - intimacy - by puking now (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend let me be the first one to read the novel he dropped out of college to write. Turns out it's titled "A Brief History of Ass" and is an incoherent ramble about every time we've had anal sex. FML

#20989324
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50480) - you deserved it (8006)

On 12/11/2013 at 7:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I learned that just because you live on a different continent, it doesn't mean your mother won't come knocking when you are having sex. FML

#20989004
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53007) - you deserved it (4600)

On 12/11/2013 at 2:59pm - intimacy - by hi Mum - United States (South Carolina)

Today, as a pickup line, a guy said to me, "Yo, can I kiss your vag' under the mistletoe?" FML

#20985559
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48391) - you deserved it (4572)

On 12/08/2013 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by mistletoe (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my wife made me a Sex Rewards Chart, where I get points by doing chores and such, and 50 points gets me some action. She refuses to even look at me if I haven't earned the points, and is contemplating sleeping alone in the guest room until I earn more points. FML

#20983710
398 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58403) - you deserved it (18340)

On 12/07/2013 at 9:55am - intimacy - by feiedbutter - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I took a nap, fully clothed. I woke up to him panicking. He'd had a wet dream and was scared that his sperm somehow swam through several layers of clothing and got me pregnant. FML

#20982965
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50810) - you deserved it (5306)

On 12/06/2013 at 4:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my boyfriend's idea of foreplay was to offer to make lunch, leave the room for a few minutes, then come back with no clothes on and offer me a "cockmeat sandwich". FML

#20982904
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48403) - you deserved it (8049)

On 12/06/2013 at 3:23pm - intimacy - by fuckadaisical (woman) - United Kingdom (Rhondda Cynon Taff)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when I got a sudden agonising cramp in my foot. I cried out in pain, but he didn't stop. If anything, my cries of pain seemed to spur him on. FML

#20981691
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44108) - you deserved it (7907)

On 12/05/2013 at 2:10pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Sunderland)



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: