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anonimeeeee

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anonimeeeee

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 3 July 1997 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7166
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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anonimeeeee's page activity

Visits<b>cluch3</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 7:14pm<b>christian1509</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 4:38pm<b>AngryRussianGuy</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 10:30pm<b>beatrice18</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 8:38pm<b>Tim2415</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 11:39pm<b>stealth647</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 8:58am<b>cosicosei</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 12:50am<b>olpally</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 11:07am<b>That_Wolf_Gurl</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 12:30pm<b>jujuthefroggy</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 10:04am<b>FallenShadows</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 3:50pm<b>Zoeythedinosaur</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 12:32pm<b>DeidaraAkatsuki</b> - the 06/17/2013 at 2:25pm<b>FrankHotpants</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 11:54pm<b>LmfaoLmao</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 1:54pm<b>AustinDillon3Fan</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 1:00pm<b>Carmelo_Anthony1</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 12:04pm<b>JohnzSexyMamas11</b> - the 01/18/2013 at 1:14pm

anonimeeeee's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of anonimeeeee's badges

anonimeeeee's favorite FMLs

Today, I was digging in my lawn, trying to ignore the suspicious glances coming from my nosy fuckball of a neighbor. When he asked what I was doing, I replied with dripping sarcasm, that I was digging up the schoolkids I killed last year. Fifteen minutes later, the cops he called arrived. FML

#20015702
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35205) - you deserved it (9229)

On 08/11/2012 at 7:47pm - misc - by diggingaplotforone - United States (California)

Today, I was on the bus when I felt a big yawn coming on, one so big that my mouth stretched and my eyes closed. It was at this point that the strange man beside me decided to lean over at lightning speed and put his tongue in my mouth. Technically it was my first kiss. I'm 21 years old. FML

#20014909
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46036) - you deserved it (5284)

On 08/11/2012 at 6:33am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, after my boyfriend and I had gotten frisky last night, I found a note on the front door of my building that read, "Dear girl in apartment 3D, from now on please close the blinds all the way or lose 30 pounds. Either would be acceptable." FML

#20012782
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33836) - you deserved it (17635)

On 08/10/2012 at 1:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Europe

Today, my soon-to-be stepson, 13, decided that he and I needed to spend "more quality time" together. His idea? We should start "bonding" by taking a bath together. When I said no, he told me I was being unfair, and that if I really loved him, I'd do it. FML

#19999925
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32604) - you deserved it (2538)

On 08/03/2012 at 4:21am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my sister and I were watching the Olympics. Michael Phelps was on the screen, and I was thinking how hot he is. My sister commented on how he looks so much like our brother. I can never look at either of them the same way ever again. FML

#19995813
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25858) - you deserved it (3889)

On 08/01/2012 at 1:51am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I tried to explain to my daughter why she couldn’t have a sleepover with her boyfriend yet. She said, "If you're so worried about me having sex, then you failed as a father because I've already banged four guys." FML

#19995628
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61845) - you deserved it (11614)

On 08/01/2012 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, at my job, an old lady kept calling her inhaler a blow job. I kindly explained to her why she couldn't call her inhaler that. She continued to ask me for a blow job in front of visitors. I had to say yes. FML

#19986519
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31529) - you deserved it (2695)

On 07/27/2012 at 12:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

#19959363
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12745) - you deserved it (40794)

On 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by Bontempi (man) - France

Today, I was called into my first day of work as a cashier. Not even 30 minutes into training, my boss had already "accidentally" touched my ass 7 times. FML

#19897423
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30364) - you deserved it (2565)

On 07/05/2012 at 10:13pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my waiter turned to me and asked, "Let me guess, Miss I'm-not-fat-I'm-fluffy wants a diet coke?" FML

#19895683
348 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40569) - you deserved it (9645)

On 07/05/2012 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my dad got drunk and played a practical joke on me; a practical joke that resulted in my knee being broken. Now, I'm sitting in a hospital bed all alone while my dad hunts for "hot nurses". FML

#19881083
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28343) - you deserved it (1910)

On 07/02/2012 at 1:44pm - health - by justhelpful (woman) - Austria (Tirol)

Today, I went to the beach with my boyfriend and family. My sister coyly pointed out the scratch marks down his back, hoping to embarrass me in front of my parents. The marks weren't from me. FML

#19873995
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32156) - you deserved it (2226)

On 07/01/2012 at 12:22am - love - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I saw a large spider carry away the body of a dead spider in the bathroom. In my anthropology class, we learned one of the first signs of civilization is caring for the dead. First, they become civilized, and next, they take over. I will never sleep again. FML

Today, the Jehovah's Witnesses witnessed me whacking off on my couch. FML



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