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anonimeeeee

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anonimeeeee
  • Town/Country : Sydney, Australia
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 3 July 1997 (16 years)
  • Number of visits : 1745
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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anonimeeeee's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

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I NEED to know!

You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.

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anonimeeeee's favorite FMLs

Today, the pervert in my computer class asked me if I "mowed my lawn." Not knowing this was a vaguely sexual term, I replied, "No, my dad does." FML

#18983166
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36940) - you deserved it (8388)

On 02/03/2012 at 9:47am - intimacy - by xX_nsn_Xx (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML

#18974920
215 comments

Today, I was driving back home with my family. I had to sit quietly for half an hour, all while pretending I didn't notice my sister playing with herself under the coat on her lap. FML

#18891781
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39065) - you deserved it (3206)

On 01/23/2012 at 5:36pm - intimacy - by jjs51 (man) - United States

Today, I got my period at school. I didn't notice until a boy asked me if I'd killed someone in my pants. FML

#18802819
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40122) - you deserved it (3592)

On 01/14/2012 at 2:47am - health - by shitttyyyday - United States

Today, I learned if you've slept with your soon to be step-brother you should tell your family. If you don't, he may blurt it out while drunk at a family barbecue. FML

#18594969
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14630) - you deserved it (37006)

On 12/24/2011 at 1:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I noticed that my facial hair had grown by an acceptable amount. I spoke to my Dad and decided to show him, thinking he would approve of my manliness. His exact words when I showed him were, "Nah, son. You just look like a lesbian." FML

#18439868
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23393) - you deserved it (4808)

On 12/05/2011 at 9:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)

Today, I dressed up as Santa Claus for my employees' children. After seeing all the others, my daughter's turn arrived. She sat on my lap, put her lips to my ear, and whispered softly: "I want a new dad." FML

#18418543
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50968) - you deserved it (5172) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/03/2011 at 11:24am - kids - by perenoel - France

Today, my husband and I went to my overbearing mom's 57th birthday party. He opened his gift in front of her and said smugly, "The makeup's for your face, and the prayer book's for the fat rolls." Any hope of family peace is now lost. FML

#18414489
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20240) - you deserved it (3048)

On 12/02/2011 at 8:35pm - love - by bad blood, no shit (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found a note on my door that said "I masturbate to your pictures on Facebook." Someone else wrote "like" at the bottom. FML

#18224618
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37253) - you deserved it (7524)

On 11/12/2011 at 12:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend and I had dinner at my boss's house. Just before we were ready to eat, my girlfriend came to me with a desperate look in her eyes. Apparently, she took a dump, clogged the toilet, and it flooded. I took the hit for her, and now my boss thinks I'm a jackass. FML

#18198987
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35143) - you deserved it (3811)

On 11/09/2011 at 12:59am - love - by kdeeeceee - United States

Today, I was driving home from work with the window down. I felt what I thought was rain coming through the window, until I looked over and realized it was urine mist coming from the cattle truck next to me. FML

#18195085
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28641) - you deserved it (2807)

On 11/08/2011 at 6:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I ran into my boyfriend's dad. His exact words were, "Call me when you're ready to feel what a real man can do to you." FML

#18145171
318 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60393) - you deserved it (4436)

On 11/03/2011 at 3:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I convinced my best friend to talk to the guy I like at work to find out if he was interested in me. She came back ten minutes later, and told me he said he'd never be able to date me. Apparently, kissing me "would be like making out with Mother Teresa's corpse." FML

#18084228
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23839) - you deserved it (3127)

On 10/26/2011 at 9:38pm - love - by nekogirl15 (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, while at my job as a hostess, I was seating a couple and their adorable little girl. I tried to ask how old she was, but what came out was, "Aww, what breed is she?" FML

#18039986
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15116) - you deserved it (28072)

On 10/21/2011 at 5:27pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out my boss and some employees on my floor have bets placed on who can get the best picture of my ass. I found out when one of the pictures was accidentally sent to me. FML

#18022998
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26865) - you deserved it (3354)

On 10/19/2011 at 12:49pm - work - by ikickgingers - United States



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