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angrydinosaur's FML badges
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angrydinosaur's favorite FMLs
Today, after math class, the resident creepy kid approached me and asked me out. I've only spoken to him twice before, so I was creeped out, and I politely declined. He totally lost it, and shouted that I'm a "friend-zoning bitch" before storming out of the room. FML
by wow kid just leave me alone / 09/14/2012 at 8:03pm / United States / Love
Today, a creepy girl from my class wouldn't stop texting me and trying to call me. In order to get her to stop, I texted back saying that I was at my mom's house for a family dinner. She replied, "No you're not. I can see you right now." FML
by Anonymous / 09/12/2012 at 5:06pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my 43-year-old brother's obsession with Breaking Bad reached a new level of stupidity when he nearly got us beaten up by a bunch of meth-heads down by our local park. He went up to them with his shaved head and stupid hat, and tried to act all Walter White with them. FML
by NotJessePinkmanFFS / 09/10/2012 at 2:06am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by anonymous / 09/09/2012 at 2:15am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my grandpa was visiting. My neighbors started blasting out rap music, as they've done nearly 24/7 for months, telling me to fuck off when I complain. He went over and screamed he'd gut them like fish if they didn't pipe down. They did. He's 68 and still more intimidating than me. FML
by Anonymous / 09/07/2012 at 6:59pm / Australia (Queensland) / Work
by PuddlePirate / 09/07/2012 at 12:23pm / United States (Minnesota) / Work
by Anonymous / 09/07/2012 at 1:08am / Canada (Alberta) / Kids
by Chouse / 09/06/2012 at 9:56pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids
by Anonymous / 09/06/2012 at 8:49pm / United States (Colorado) / Work
Today, I learned I'm not allergic to gluten. My mom has kept me on a gluten free diet since I was 5. She was convinced I was allergic to it. I'm 25 and I am writing this over my first slice of pizza in 20 years. FML
by Emma / 09/04/2012 at 5:38pm / United States (Missouri) / Health
Today, I bought some bitter-apple spray to stop my puppy chewing on everything. Later, I found out how effective it was, when I tried to eat a sandwich, and gagged at the horrifying taste on my hands. My dog seems unaffected, and continues to chew the table legs. FML
by badwolf / 09/04/2012 at 4:34pm / United States / Animals
by Anonymous / 09/04/2012 at 11:09am / United States (Minnesota) / Health
Today, a girl told me she stopped eating cherries ever since her father choked on one when she was a kid. She later mentioned that she doesn't like to drive. I sarcastically asked, "Did your dad choke on a car too?" Nope, her two brothers died in a car accident. FML
by Cherrish it / 09/04/2012 at 12:24am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/03/2012 at 4:47am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/01/2012 at 7:15pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Animals
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today my mom, bored lover of games and mysteries, bragged about outsmarting scammers by burning all…