[fr]
[it]
[es2]
[tr]
[de]
[ru]
[se]

Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?

andyvillarreal5

Search for a member

andyvillarreal5
  • Town/Country : South Texas, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 11 January 1996 (16 years)
  • Number of visits : 203
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

andyvillarreal5's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

andyvillarreal5's favorite FMLs

Today, I was on webcam for the first time with a guy I've been texting for a while. Trying to show off my guitar skills, I lean down to pick it up and fell on my face. FML

#11894871 (105)

I agree, your life sucks (9117) - you deserved it (16065)

On 07/15/2010 at 5:17am - misc - by ditsy (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was on the train when I fell asleep. Everything would have been fine but I was suddenly jerked awake by the very loud sound of my own fart, followed by the stares of many strangers. FML

I agree, your life sucks (14473) - you deserved it (3760)

On 03/02/2010 at 12:05am - misc - by sleeper - Sent from mobile version

Today, in a sporting goods store, my mom walked over to the other side of the store, when a cute guy came over to talk to me. When she saw this she grabbed a bat, walked over to us and said "If you ever even look at my daughter again, I will beat you shitless." She was serious. He ran. FML

#8354648 (234)

I agree, your life sucks (21385) - you deserved it (1364)

On 02/16/2010 at 9:54pm - misc - by batter--up (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I sneezed with so much force while I was driving that I whacked my head on the steering wheel and honked the horn. FML

I agree, your life sucks (16208) - you deserved it (2794)

On 01/10/2010 at 10:37pm - misc - by Hayley (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my best friend was texting me about her sick dog. She wrote "Do you think she will get better?", so I wrote "I hope she does". It wasn't until later that I realized I accidentally wrote "I hope she dies" instead. FML

#7154032 (139)

I agree, your life sucks (22116) - you deserved it (6232)

On 01/04/2010 at 10:32pm - animals - by poordog (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my wife entered in an ugliest sweater competition at her work. She wore a plain white sweater with a picture of my face printed on it. She came home with first prize. FML

I agree, your life sucks (25952) - you deserved it (2488)

On 12/18/2009 at 2:52pm - misc - by mclovin09 (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mom revealed to me that when I was in Preschool, I used to get caught in the bathroom with little boys while I was feeling their "no no" area. I was giving hand jobs to boys before I could read. FML

#6768891 (163)

I agree, your life sucks (18649) - you deserved it (4877)

On 12/15/2009 at 9:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I lit some candles while waiting for my girlfriend to come over. I was trying to be romantic. Suddenly, I hear screaming from my bedroom. I run in thinking it was my girlfriend. Turns out my cat lit his whiskers on fire by sniffing the candles. FML

#6632857 (116)

I agree, your life sucks (20685) - you deserved it (3878)

On 12/06/2009 at 11:30am - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, at my school's Midnight Madness, I was selected to show my school spirit in a contest. Being drunk, I decided to hump the school mascot in front of 300 people. FML

#6065931 (108)

I agree, your life sucks (4163) - you deserved it (33469)

On 10/30/2009 at 1:11am - misc - by skyhawk13 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went on a date with a girl that I really like. I picked her up from her house, and as I was pulling out of her driveway, I hit her dad's BMW, knocking off the bumper. FML

I agree, your life sucks (10636) - you deserved it (17100)

On 10/25/2009 at 12:38am - misc - by Badday (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while in class, a cute boy came up and asked me for my number. I giggled and wrote my phone number on a piece of paper and told him to call me sometime. He gave me a weird look and walked away. He was asking which number math problem I needed help with. FML

I agree, your life sucks (7968) - you deserved it (20174)

On 10/19/2009 at 1:43pm - misc - by loser (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I joined a small disaster relief group. I remarked to the big, long-haired person beside me that it was surprising that I was the only female in the group. I got a cold stare. Later I asked another volunteer about that person. He answered, "Oh, her? She's my sister." FML

I agree, your life sucks (7009) - you deserved it (23384)

On 09/30/2009 at 3:30pm - work - by Blurry (woman) - Philippines (Batangas)

Today, while at a club, I walked up to a cutie who had been eyeing me all night. I asked him "Is that a phone in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?". He simply replied "It's a phone" before walking away. FML

#5482738 (137)

I agree, your life sucks (5464) - you deserved it (32509)

On 09/26/2009 at 10:15am - misc - by desperate (woman) - Denmark (Staden Kobenhavn)

Today, I posted a status update on Facebook about how much I liked the Season Finale of NBC's "Heroes". My hand slipped to the right and it came out as "I really love Herpes. It's much better than everyone says it is". I didn't notice for few hours. FML

#4774065 (130)

I agree, your life sucks (16458) - you deserved it (27809)

On 08/24/2009 at 12:28am - misc - by NotThatKind (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was driving my car and I thought the construction guy was flirting and waving at me. So I drove by him, waving back and hit an oil spill and my car ended up spinning out of control. He was trying to direct me away from the oil spill. FML

I agree, your life sucks (3946) - you deserved it (25744)

On 08/23/2009 at 1:08pm - misc - by Susan (woman) - United States (Florida)



Your account

↓ Categories

Switch to FML for visually impaired

FMyLife, the book

Available NOW on: