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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 14 November 1988 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11641
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About andycaliboy : I am determined to not use FML in this about me.... Wow i just used it. FML. Twice.

andycaliboy's page activity

Visits<b>sparkledoge</b> - the 09/01/2016 at 5:01am<b>KimJongCole</b> - the 05/31/2016 at 9:31pm<b>poiuipop</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 1:26pm<b>bananajoe666</b> - the 03/13/2016 at 8:33pm<b>Corboner</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 8:31am<b>Jkalia</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 12:54am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 11:09am<b>lbrenthurst</b> - the 09/09/2015 at 12:19am<b>teentee401</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 11:21am<b>Sexomancer</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 2:13pm<b>XmasaX</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 10:30pm<b>WaltzingPhanthom</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 9:50am<b>ZelmaSlayer</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 12:24pm<b>Violet_Embers95</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 7:08pm<b>Ashd09</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 10:14am<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 11:36pm<b>garage</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 6:29pm<b>llamasbederpin</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 10:49pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 5:09pm<b>Violet_Embers95</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 1:08am

andycaliboy's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

andycaliboy's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out why my 20 year-old girlfriend broke up with me. She was building everything she did to match her favorite TV show. The main character left her boyfriend in the exact way she left me. And the breakup email she sent me contained monologue from the TV show, word for word. FML

by micahmatt / 08/26/2009 at 3:09am / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, I found out my boyfriend stacks things on me while I sleep. Apparently his record is 4 pillows, a textbook, and the cat. FML

by Anonymous / 08/06/2009 at 7:11am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I was working the lighting for a drama production. In the last scene, two characters realize they are in love and kiss, then the stage goes dark. I mixed up my settings, and instead of a blackout, flashing party lights started going off. 300 people turn around to stare at me. FML

by Anonymous / 08/04/2009 at 4:22pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, my 250 lb ex-Marine dad announced he was going to start randomly punching me in the crotch, without warning, to "improve my reflexes." FML

by theregoesmyspermcount / 08/02/2009 at 6:45pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, I was riding my motorcycle when I saw my cheating ex-wife walking down the road. Out of anger, I spat my gum at her. I forgot that my helmet's visor was still down, so when I spat, the gum stuck against it. I was temporarily blinded and I crashed into some bushes. FML

by Anonymous / 07/29/2009 at 8:14pm / United Kingdom (London) / Transportation

Today, I told my boyfriend I was really horny. He then gave me the link to his favorite "porn". He said I should do it for him. It was a youtube video of some girl making a sandwich. FML

by fmysexlife / 07/27/2009 at 1:06am / United States (New Hampshire) / Intimacy

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. I opened my eyes to see his eyes fixed on something else. I turned my head to see what was so interesting. He was on his iPhone looking up recipes for things to wrap in bacon. FML

by a_B_c_D_e_F_g / 06/27/2009 at 10:29am / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, I rode my bike to work. While biking on the road, I gave a hand signal for turning left. A car passing the opposite way veered towards me and attempted to give me a high five. I now have cuts all over my body and my bike is in two pieces. FML

by Shaun / 06/15/2009 at 10:13pm / United States (New Jersey) / Transportation

Today, it was my birthday, and my wife gave me a sex toy for self-masturbation. She even showed me how to properly use it so I can masturbate myself. FML

by TeeJay / 06/01/2009 at 10:06am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my mom was driving me somewhere. As we were driving she got mad at a motorcycle driver telling to "get the fuck off the road." In response, the driver decided to spit into my open window. His spit landed on my face. FML

by hahahah111 / 05/25/2009 at 3:43am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my football club gave us all jerseys with our last names on them. My last name is 'Flicker'. The letters are all in uppercase. And the 'L' and the 'I' are joined together at the bottom. My jersey reads 'FUCKER'. FML

by Flicker / 05/14/2009 at 3:23am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was spending time with my boyfriend for our one year anniversary. Trying to be romantic, I told him that I loved him and I was so glad I was with him. He responded by giving me a thumbs-up and turning back to the TV. FML

by KarolBee / 05/14/2009 at 2:48am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I graduated from college and my parents gave me an apple. Not the computer, the fruit. FML

by anon / 05/13/2009 at 1:39pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took a call. Wrong number. A few seconds later, they called back and I told her that she had the wrong number. She said she just hit redial and didn't understand how she got me again. I tried to explain how redial works. She called me a moron and hung up. Then my phone rang again. FML

by Anonymous / 05/12/2009 at 1:39pm / United States (Minnesota) / Work

Today, I found out that the girl I've been dating online for over three months is actually a very bored 14-year-old boy. FML

by Iman / 05/04/2009 at 2:12am / United States (California) / Love