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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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andrysb24

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andrysb24
  • Town/Country : Chicago, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 15 August 1988 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 1407
  • Number of comments : 34
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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andrysb24's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to explain to my 18-year-old daughter why she can't pull a duck face pose for her driver's license. She still doesn't believe me. FML

#18982251 (227)

I agree, your life sucks (8363) - you deserved it (1059)

On 02/03/2012 at 2:58am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, two American guys attacked me for not speaking their language. I'm from England, and they said I'm speaking my own language wrong. FML

#18525821 (54)

I agree, your life sucks (12691) - you deserved it (1627)

On 12/16/2011 at 3:50am - misc - by Brit - Reserved

Today, at my job as a waitress, I fell, landed on my ass, managing not to spill the drinks or drop the food in my hands. A little boy yelled "NINJA WAITRESS!" Every one at work has been calling me that all day, and purposely been trying to trip me to see if I could do it again. FML

#18390822 (164)

I agree, your life sucks (17481) - you deserved it (2472)

On 11/30/2011 at 12:39am - work - by immy504 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I went to go get my driver's license, only to be told that I need a copy of my birth certificate. In order to get the copy of my birth certificate, I need a driver's license or my passport. In order to get a passport, I need a copy of my birth certificate or a drivers license. I have none. FML

#18385235 (269)

I agree, your life sucks (12958) - you deserved it (1391)

On 11/29/2011 at 1:40pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I asked my Dad if it was true that my mother had a C-section at my birth. He replied "Yeah, so technically you weren't even born, you were surgically removed, like a tumor." FML

#17638273 (61)

I agree, your life sucks (25877) - you deserved it (3077)

On 09/01/2011 at 7:40pm - misc - by mannydanny (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, I met my new neighbor. His wi-fi access point is named "TheRapistDownstairs." FML

#17483730 (283)

I agree, your life sucks (11694) - you deserved it (1015)

On 08/15/2011 at 8:30pm - misc - by creepedoutlady - United States

Today, while I was in the shower, my curious cat jumped in. She decided she really doesn't like showers and to avoid getting wet, used my naked body as a makeshift tree. FML

#16467206 (126)

I agree, your life sucks (11990) - you deserved it (1421)

On 06/02/2011 at 12:06pm - animals - by brittaneejanex - United States

Today, we finally got wireless Internet. My mom won't let us open any doors or windows in fear that it might "let the Internet out". It's 103 degrees in here. FML

#16464662 (405)

I agree, your life sucks (45451) - you deserved it (2997)

On 06/02/2011 at 5:45am - health - by meyo555 - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I was stood up by a blind date. After calling and texting her about being a horrible person, she called me from the hospital. She was in a car accident. FML

#16439169 (133)

I agree, your life sucks (8242) - you deserved it (38246)

On 05/31/2011 at 6:35pm - love - by bfall74 - Canada

Today, I skipped school and stayed home without telling my parents. My mom came home on her lunch break with another man, and had sex in our living room. I'm stuck in my room, listening to my mom cheat on my dad. FML

#16168666 (455)

I agree, your life sucks (81178) - you deserved it (8946)

On 05/14/2011 at 7:15am - intimacy - by ali grace - United States (Texas)

Today, someone asked my wife if I was her father. FML

#16000411 (156)

I agree, your life sucks (24667) - you deserved it (5365)

On 05/01/2011 at 3:03am - misc - by Steve.mc - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my dog was barking at a squirrel in the yard. I opened the door to let him chase the squirrel. I went to look at the dead squirrel and found out it was the neighbor's chihuahua. FML

#15714709 (296)

I agree, your life sucks (17215) - you deserved it (24646)

On 04/09/2011 at 8:58pm - animals - by Sid (man) - United States (California)

Today, I joked with my dad, saying I'd gotten my boyfriend pregnant. In response, he slapped me, threw my phone across the room, smashed my laptop, and then took a moment for what I'd said to sink in. FML

#15514877 (362)

I agree, your life sucks (32594) - you deserved it (21505)

On 03/27/2011 at 2:09pm - misc - by rowie1311 (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, I found out my dad ate my pet rabbit two years ago. He said he ran away. FML

#14847630 (205)

I agree, your life sucks (37736) - you deserved it (2744)

On 02/05/2011 at 1:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, while in my room sleeping, my little brother deemed it necessary to come in and drop a book on my face. When I sat up with a now bloody nose, he looked at me, pointed, and said "You've just been facebooked" and ran away giggling. FML

#14806356 (210)

I agree, your life sucks (34247) - you deserved it (6128)

On 02/02/2011 at 12:57am - kids - by Malakai - United States