andrysb24

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andrysb24

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 15 August 1988 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4411
  • Number of comments : 35
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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andrysb24's page activity

Visits<b>myoukei</b> - the 09/29/2015 at 7:27am<b>FusionPlacebo</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 1:27am<b>euphoriagorillaz</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 12:35am<b>bigham_1234</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 4:22pm<b>mongoose80</b> - the 12/10/2012 at 7:59pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 3:45am<b>cosmolatte</b> - the 01/23/2011 at 11:39pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 12/13/2010 at 1:29pm<b>Anteezy</b> - the 05/10/2010 at 9:29am<b>Andreeya</b> - the 04/16/2010 at 4:39pm<b>rallets</b> - the 04/12/2010 at 4:06pm<b>aardvarkish</b> - the 03/21/2010 at 9:29pm<b>RuffRider022</b> - the 03/20/2010 at 7:10pm<b>JukeboxBunny</b> - the 03/12/2010 at 10:23pm

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50 favourites

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andrysb24's favorite FMLs

Today, feeling lonely after my recent breakup, I put on my nicest clothes and went out clubbing with a few friends. I brought a guy back to my place, and we got intimate. It was going well, until he took off my push-up bra, then panicked and drunkenly asked, "Where'd they go?!" FML

by chase / 01/24/2013 at 7:54pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Intimacy

Today, I went out for dinner with my long-term crush, who turned out to be a huge dog person. He asked me which dog breed I like the most. In an attempt to reply with both Labrador and Doberman, I accidentally said Dumbledore. FML

by Anonymous / 01/10/2013 at 7:20am / Slovakia / Miscellaneous

Today, my daughter had a meltdown when I told her I donated some of her old toys to Goodwill. It turns out Toy Story has taught her that toys have feelings and that she has a meaningful relationship with them. She's in her teens. FML

by susan / 11/17/2012 at 5:31pm / United States (Illinois) / Kids

Today, I was at a party, when the cops busted us. Since I'm underage, I hid behind a chair for an hour and a half while they breathalyzed everyone and sat them in the same room I was in. The cops left, everyone realized I was behind the chair, and now my nickname is "Anne Frank". FML

by Anonymous / 04/12/2012 at 2:31pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to explain to my 18-year-old daughter why she can't pull a duck face pose for her driver's license. She still doesn't believe me. FML

by Anonymous / 02/03/2012 at 2:58am / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Kids

Today, two American guys attacked me for not speaking their language. I'm from England, and they said I'm speaking my own language wrong. FML

by Brit / 12/16/2011 at 3:50am / Reserved / Miscellaneous

Today, at my job as a waitress, I fell, landed on my ass, managing not to spill the drinks or drop the food in my hands. A little boy yelled "NINJA WAITRESS!" Every one at work has been calling me that all day, and purposely been trying to trip me to see if I could do it again. FML

by immy504 / 11/30/2011 at 12:39am / United States (Louisiana) / Work

Today, I went to go get my driver's license, only to be told that I need a copy of my birth certificate. In order to get the copy of my birth certificate, I need a driver's license or my passport. In order to get a passport, I need a copy of my birth certificate or a drivers license. I have none. FML

by Anonymous / 11/29/2011 at 1:40pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked my Dad if it was true that my mother had a C-section at my birth. He replied "Yeah, so technically you weren't even born, you were surgically removed, like a tumor." FML

by mannydanny / 09/01/2011 at 7:40pm / United Kingdom (Coventry) / Miscellaneous

Today, I met my new neighbor. His wi-fi access point is named "TheRapistDownstairs." FML

by creepedoutlady / 08/15/2011 at 8:30pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my five year old daughter came up to me and told me she wanted to be a nun. When I asked why, she replied, "So I won't get my heart broken by a boy." FML

by julia / 06/11/2011 at 7:12am / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, while I was in the shower, my curious cat jumped in. She decided she really doesn't like showers and to avoid getting wet, used my naked body as a makeshift tree. FML

by brittaneejanex / 06/02/2011 at 12:06pm / United States / Animals

Today, we finally got wireless Internet. My mom won't let us open any doors or windows in fear that it might "let the Internet out". It's 103 degrees in here. FML

by meyo555 / 06/02/2011 at 5:45am / United States (Nebraska) / Health

Today, I was stood up by a blind date. After calling and texting her about being a horrible person, she called me from the hospital. She was in a car accident. FML

by bfall74 / 05/31/2011 at 6:35pm / Canada / Transportation

Today, I skipped school and stayed home without telling my parents. My mom came home on her lunch break with another man, and had sex in our living room. I'm stuck in my room, listening to my mom cheat on my dad. FML

by ali grace / 05/14/2011 at 7:15am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy