Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

androiddestroya

Search for a member

androiddestroya

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 20 August 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 660
  • Number of comments : 115
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About androiddestroya : I love acting :)

I love to read, write and interpret plays :D

I have an awesome girlfriend :3

androiddestroya's page activity

Visits<b>dubb420</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 5:08pm<b>meb123hazel</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 1:53pm<b>rabbitlover16</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 10:34am<b>MichelleRuzicka</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 3:25pm<b>jentlemen</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 6:26am<b>levodkamartini</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 11:35am<b>slippy327</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 3:19am<b>why_teh_hell</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 6:47pm<b>quentinduhe</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 8:22pm<b>Kordellf</b> - the 11/24/2013 at 8:24am<b>mzrayray</b> - the 11/15/2013 at 6:35pm<b>itawebbies</b> - the 07/25/2013 at 11:41pm<b>sleeplessjimmy</b> - the 07/25/2013 at 6:08pm<b>arielmarie17</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 5:08pm<b>georjayy</b> - the 06/30/2013 at 6:42pm<b>wowcrazy245</b> - the 06/14/2013 at 11:45pm<b>SgrA</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 7:52am<b>amsss</b> - the 05/30/2013 at 12:37pm

androiddestroya's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of androiddestroya's badges

androiddestroya's favorite FMLs

Today, I spoke to my crush for the first time, and after a while he asked for my number. Ecstatic, I took the first piece of paper I saw out of my purse. I wrote it down and gave it to him, but he handed it back and said, "You might need this." It was an appointment card for my therapist. FML

#20502338
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29306) - you deserved it (7169)

On 02/11/2013 at 2:19pm - love - by sofuckingembarassing. (woman) - United States

Today, it's my boyfriend's birthday. He really likes Legend of Zelda, so I put on a Link hat, took my clothes off, and waited for him at his place. He came home with a hooker. FML

#20502217
172 comments

Today, I was talking to an attractive guy, but I was so nervous that I got tongue-tied and then blurted out, "Stupid autocorrect." FML

#20501923
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16258) - you deserved it (27274)

On 02/11/2013 at 3:57am - misc - by tongue tied - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my fiancé told me that it would be okay with him if I got plastic surgery to make my boobs larger. It would also be okay with him if I didn't get the surgery, but he would call off our engagement and never talk to me again. FML

#20499439
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50806) - you deserved it (5903)

On 02/09/2013 at 11:11am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I told my parents that I was going to hang out with some friends. My dad guffawed and said, "Ooh, look at Mary, pretending she has a social life." Thanks, Dad. FML

#20498469
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26464) - you deserved it (2839)

On 02/08/2013 at 5:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, I was playing Slender, when I caught a glimpse of the Slenderman. I jumped in my chair, letting rip a huge fart in the process. Nobody heard it, but only because my shrieks of terror drowned out the sound. FML

#20498426
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21689) - you deserved it (8425)

On 02/08/2013 at 4:59pm - misc - by theydidsmellitthough (man) - Israel (HaMerkaz)

Today, my boyfriend called me a freak for wanting to have sex for a second night in a row. FML

#20495286
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47365) - you deserved it (5473)

On 02/06/2013 at 1:01am - intimacy - by frustrated! (woman) - United States

Today, I took my 5-year old daughter to get a photo taken with Santa, when she asked the dreaded question of why this Santa looked different from one at the other store. Before I could placate her, some cunt of a kid yelled, "Because he's not real, dumbass!" FML

#20416717
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36111) - you deserved it (5628)

On 12/23/2012 at 4:36pm - kids - by still had to pay (man) - Australia

Today, I'm insanely hungover from a long night of drinking. I'm going to my nephew's baptism in an hour as his godmother. FML

#20402048
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6498) - you deserved it (48480)

On 12/16/2012 at 12:26pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was burgled while I was on the toilet. FML

#20402014
133 comments

Today, I gave a homeless man my last bit of spare change so he could get on the bus. Just as I was about to get on too, I realized I'd lost my bus card. I had to get off the bus and watch as the man waved at me through the window. FML

#20192452
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22191) - you deserved it (2641)

On 12/05/2012 at 3:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I finally summoned the courage to ask my dad to pay me as he promised, after I cut the lawn and cleaned all the house windows last week. His response was, "Get fucked." FML

#20188543
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20800) - you deserved it (2700)

On 12/02/2012 at 8:57pm - misc - by :/ (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my parents heard from my sister that I'd recently lost my virginity to my girlfriend. I've never been bitched out so viciously in my life, and yet my sister, whom everyone knows has had numerous casual sexual partners this year, is treated like a princess 24/7. FML

#20188038
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25363) - you deserved it (2066)

On 12/02/2012 at 1:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Suffolk)

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he'd rather play the new Assassin's Creed game or have a night of sex with me. He started crying from indecision. FML

#20176354
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34281) - you deserved it (10911)

On 11/24/2012 at 8:54am - intimacy - by ladylol (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, I had to tell my 7 year old son it's not polite to jack off in public. FML

#19126066
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32104) - you deserved it (4983)

On 02/20/2012 at 8:43pm - intimacy - by Gothicbunnyx3 - United States



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: