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andrew130

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andrew130

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 1 January 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 703
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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andrew130's page activity

Visits<b>PleasantDino</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 3:26am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 11:01am

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andrew130's favorite FMLs

Today, I got wasted at a party and went out to my car to get something. I went back to the house and realized I got locked out. After knocking on the door, ringing the doorbell, and shouting "LET ME INNNN" my friend called and asked where I was. That's when I realized I was at the wrong house. FML

#6246770
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6105) - you deserved it (33942)

On 11/10/2009 at 7:10pm - misc - by Abby (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I got two viruses on my laptop. One was a fake anti-spyware program that cluttered the screen with pop-ups. The other opened explorer repeatedly, each time to a generic porn site. This all conveniently happened at work, on a projector and during a meeting. FML

#3389497
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48575) - you deserved it (6606)

On 07/01/2009 at 5:37am - work - by Robert (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I finally got into a yoga class with the instructor I've been crushing on for 2 years. As he walked closer to greet me, I lifted my leg over my head into a full split, and queefed obnoxiously loud. He responded with his gag reflex. FML

#3241027
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44959) - you deserved it (26783)

On 06/26/2009 at 12:51pm - misc - by LondonKitsch (woman) - United States

Today, I was using a public bathroom when a woman backs in, pulls down her pants, and sits on my lap. Needless to say she didn't even notice I was there until I hyperventilated. FML

#2928893
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38695) - you deserved it (3959)

On 06/16/2009 at 12:06am - misc - by yourmom (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was visiting my sick grandmother in the hospital when my cousin and I were playing in some empty wheelchairs. After goofing off I said, "They're fun, but I would kill myself if I was in a wheelchair." A little boy rounded the corner and said, "Tell me about it." He was in a wheelchair. FML

#2138736
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10470) - you deserved it (74299)

On 05/21/2009 at 5:48am - misc - by boyo (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was telling my mother about my earrings hurting my ears. I had a cut on my ear close to the piercing and she thought that I had mistaken the cut for the opening, and said (as we walked past a car full of men), "Well of course it hurts when you put it in the wrong hole!". FML

#2045344
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68172) - you deserved it (7715)

On 05/18/2009 at 8:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, I found out that my husband named our daughter after his favorite porn star. FML

#1749459
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (138782) - you deserved it (14116)

On 05/08/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by Oblivious (woman) - Kuwait

Today, I was having cybersex via webcam with my boyfriend. Trying to be as sexy as I could, I started sucking on my finger. Judging by the look on my boyfriend's face, he was getting really into it. As I started getting into it too, I shoved my finger too far down and puked all over my laptop. FML

#1387325
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24095) - you deserved it (121213)

On 04/27/2009 at 9:51am - intimacy - by BARF (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was getting ready for bed, when I decided to watch some porno on the computer. Suddenly someone from my messenger list says, "You might want to turn off the 'What You're Listening To' option if you're watching porn." I snapped and exited the porn. 63 people saw. FML

#1292881
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18528) - you deserved it (72010)

On 04/24/2009 at 4:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mom made me clean. I was dusting in the living room and heard gunshots outside the apartment. I dove on the floor and started crying and screaming. My mom walked in and informed me that the sound was her making popcorn. FML

#1183263
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13217) - you deserved it (65341)

On 04/21/2009 at 1:20am - misc - by Chelsea (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was going running. It was an especially windy day and things were flying through the wind. Apparently, bodily fluid can also fly through the wind. Turns out, a women was barfing over a bridge and the wind caught it and it flew through the air. Right into my face and body. FML

#879830
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77208) - you deserved it (3288)

On 04/09/2009 at 12:14am - misc - by fedlife (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend was in the shower, and I decided to go join him. I took all my clothes off and stepped into the bathroom. I slipped on some water, and ended up hitting my head on the toilet and passing out. When I came to, I saw my boyfriend's dad looking over me in his towel. Wrong person. FML

#796416
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74680) - you deserved it (40995)

On 04/04/2009 at 4:04am - intimacy - by showerstupid (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was mowing the lawn of my brand new house, located in a very nice neighborhood (I am a hispanic male), and a lady in her nice white cadillac drove up and asked me, in extremely broken spanish, if I could mow her lawn too. FML

#664071
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (134379) - you deserved it (10536)

On 03/28/2009 at 4:17pm - misc - by Michaelichael (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, this girl and I were chilling in my apartment and things got heated up and we started making out. One thing lead to another and the next thing I knew she was giving me head. I was getting ready to bust when she stopped, looked up into my eyes and said "Do you believe in Jesus?" FML

#618909
379 comments

I agree, your life sucks (200198) - you deserved it (31571)

On 03/26/2009 at 7:41am - intimacy - by JAY22 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went on a run with this cute guy I know. I was sweating untractively and profusely so I decided to discretly grab a leaf from a tree and wipe my face with it. A bird had done the same with his ass few minutes ago. FML

#261898
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39922) - you deserved it (29025)

On 03/10/2009 at 4:42pm - animals - by broussimousse - United Kingdom (London)



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