amifaiyaz

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Offline (the 08/04/2015 at 10:06pm)

amifaiyaz

7Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 November 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 11332
  • Number of comments : 380
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About amifaiyaz : I never know how to write these things.. pretty much a crazy cat lady in the making, I'm your everyday city girl living in the middle of a desert for a decade. FMLs make my mornings, right before I ride my camel to school.

amifaiyaz's page activity

Visits<b>flyingflies</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 5:19am<b>alex1010</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 10:57pm<b>IridianShadow</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 3:04pm<b>thatotk</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 3:20pm<b>ShroudedKnife</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 1:22pm<b>The_Egy</b> - the 12/23/2015 at 11:00pm<b>pantsman66</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 9:04pm<b>Cristian89</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 12:43pm<b>im_a_squid</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 9:19pm<b>jonathan896</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 3:22pm<b>Envy22</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 6:19pm<b>MomentoMori</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 1:18am<b>xzanex</b> - the 09/14/2015 at 2:16am<b>pokysmalls</b> - the 09/13/2015 at 10:58am<b>CaptainSmith28</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 5:46pm<b>ratman775</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 12:40pm<b>DarthDeath</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 11:36pm<b>GrymReefer420</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 1:36am

Fucked!<b>beeferjay</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 8:25am<b>MomentoMori</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 6:46am<b>Aly_donawho</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 5:44am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 9:08pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 2:54am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 11:01pm<b>MNBOY16</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 4:19pm

amifaiyaz's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

See all of amifaiyaz's badges

amifaiyaz's favorite FMLs

Today, while video chatting with my girlfriend, who lives on the other side of the country, I thought I'd play a song for her on my guitar. The string broke and hit me in the face. I burst into tears and had to hang up. FML

by Anonymous / 01/21/2013 at 12:04pm / United States / Love

Today, I went to see my new dentist. He was really cute, so after the checkup I started flirting. He stopped me right after I asked him out, saying, "Being a dentist has its advantages, I can see the girl's mouth before I stick my tongue in it. And in your case, it's a big no." FML

by black and yellow / 01/21/2013 at 1:32am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my boyfriend of three days met up with me at the movie theater, sporting a crude tattoo of my face on his cheek, along with a love heart and the word "forever." Looks like I'm single again. FML

by maybe dead in a day / 01/20/2013 at 2:28pm / United States (Minnesota) / Love

Today, my grandmother called me to tell me that there will be a nice, single guy for me to meet at the family reunion. She went on and on about how perfect he was for me. I didn't have the heart to tell her I'm a lesbian, and have been out to the rest of the family for over six years. FML

by RP Havens / 01/10/2013 at 1:25am / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, my husband and I found the perfect house, in our price range and everything we wanted in a house. However, the street it's on is called "Arbour Butte Road". My husband refuses to buy it because he doesn't want it to sound like he lives "in a tree's ass." I'm married to an idiot. FML

by it's just a name / 01/10/2013 at 12:53am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I caught my boyfriend wearing yoga pants and taking pictures of his butt to post on a "Girls in yoga pants" site. He saw my expression and said, "Nah, it's cool, I hid my junk so they'll think it's a chick!" FML

by Amy / 01/10/2013 at 12:09am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my daughter learned a new song. This would be great, except for the lisp her teacher has. I now have a child screaming about the "itchy bitchy spider" at the top of her lungs. FML

by ugh / 01/08/2013 at 8:01pm / United States (Michigan) / Kids

Today, I tried to get my boyfriend to roll over while he was asleep. He snores loud enough to wake the neighbors and if he lays on his side he usually stops. Instead of rolling over, he stuck his leg in the air, farted twice, and laughed about it in his sleep. He's still snoring. FML

by no sleep for me / 01/08/2013 at 2:44am / Miscellaneous

Today, I got into an accident on my motorcycle. When I told my wife that the doctor said I couldn't have sex for two weeks, she couldn't contain her joy. FML

by Anonymous / 01/08/2013 at 12:20am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I'm too "high maintenance". And that's because I ask him to use condoms when we have sex, and I refuse to invite my friends over for threesomes. I don't know why I'm not actually glad we are broken up. FML

by kat124ever / 01/07/2013 at 3:35am / United States (Armed Forces Europe, Middle East) / Love

Today, I went out to meet a wonderful woman I'd chatted with online. I did have a few fears about if she was really just some guy trying to make a fool out of me. When I met her, she really was a girl, and was happy to see me. Problem: she was actually 13. I'm 34. FML

by lifsabtch / 01/06/2013 at 12:24pm / Love

Today, my friend and I were trying out a site on which you talk to strangers using a mic and webcam. We came across a cute guy, who said to my friend, "Tell the fat guy to move." He was referring to me. I'm a girl. FML

by Pennepestoem / 01/05/2013 at 2:07pm / Philippines (Manila) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my friend and I were trying out a site on which you talk to strangers using a mic and webcam. We came across a cute guy, who said to my friend, "Tell the fat guy to move." He was referring to me. I'm a girl. FML

by Pennepestoem / 01/05/2013 at 2:07pm / Philippines (Manila) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went to take a shower. Afterwards, I noticed I'd forgotten to bring a shirt to change into, so I put on a towel and went back to my room, only to witness my 14-year-old brother and a friend smelling my bra, commenting on "how warm it is". FML

by PrezKisame / 01/03/2013 at 3:35pm / Australia (Queensland) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my husband came home with a bunch of realistic-looking wigs for women. When I asked them what they were for, he said he wanted to spice up our sex life with them. When I told him I refused to wear a wig, he said in a very serious tone that I wasn't going to be the one wearing them, he was. FML

by Anonymous / 01/02/2013 at 5:34am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy