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amifaiyaz

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amifaiyaz

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 November 1993 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3580
  • Number of comments : 378
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About amifaiyaz : God, I never know how to write these things.. pretty much a crazy cat lady in the making and a madwoman to boot, I'm your everyday city girl living in the middle of a desert for the past 8 years.. FMLs make my mornings, right before I ride my camel to school. AMA :)

amifaiyaz's page activity

Visits<b>MomentoMori</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 5:17pm<b>Broadway_Vayne</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 2:11pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 2:31pm<b>pantsman66</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 2:39pm<b>izzy117</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 8:44am<b>somthingstupd</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 1:29am<b>thisguy184</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 9:54pm<b>abattior</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 2:49am<b>ColbyGB</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 12:01am<b>samfate</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 1:08am<b>Jellybellybeanz</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 12:44am<b>Live4funny</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 8:42am<b>zeriously95</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 11:20am<b>Ghosty546</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 12:53pm<b>screamtobeheard</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 2:01am<b>groovycrazyjoe</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 11:19pm<b>sexyboi1985</b> - the 03/31/2014 at 2:52pm<b>msmama1985</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 11:32pm

amifaiyaz's FML badges

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of amifaiyaz's badges

amifaiyaz's favorite FMLs

Today, I was woken up by my husband attempting to breastfeed off my lactating nipples. FML

#20139029
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22040) - you deserved it (2776)

On 10/29/2012 at 6:22pm - misc - by Indianagirl94 (woman) - United States

Today, after I gave birth to our first child, my husband looked at the doctor and seriously asked, "When do you circumcise the baby?" We had a baby girl. FML

#20138333
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23226) - you deserved it (2212)

On 10/29/2012 at 6:32am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, over a family dinner, my husband and I told everyone that I'm pregnant. My father frowned and said, "Again?", my 9-year-old daughter started crying, and her brother smirked and yelled, "Up the ass, no babies!" FML

#20136968
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23333) - you deserved it (5165)

On 10/28/2012 at 12:44pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my coworker and I were sitting and eating lunch. We noticed a little kid kept staring at us, and every time we looked away he would come a little bit closer. When he was right behind us, I looked and was startled enough to jump. The parents were three tables down laughing uncontrollably. FML

#20136682
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20248) - you deserved it (3182)

On 10/28/2012 at 8:29am - work - by radioinvader (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I said "bless you" to a nice man who sneezed on the subway. That nice man has now followed me home and stood outside my apartment complex for two hours, claiming to be my "soulmate." FML

#20136351
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29561) - you deserved it (2397)

On 10/28/2012 at 12:22am - love - by prettylady? - United States

Today, I saw a folder on my son's PC named "PussyPictures". I sat him down for a talk, only to be told they contained pictures of the James Bond character Pussy Galore, for his essay about sexism in movies. He's now mocking me for "having a dirty mind". FML

#20135671
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9000) - you deserved it (32788)

On 10/27/2012 at 3:28pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, my mom called me from jail. She was arrested for having sex in public. I was with my dad when I got the call. FML

#20135378
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48429) - you deserved it (2528)

On 10/27/2012 at 11:02am - intimacy - by Monkey (man) - United States

Today, it's the five year anniversary of the day I broke up with my girlfriend to see other people. I've not had sex a single time since. FML

#20134961
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12023) - you deserved it (56145)

On 10/27/2012 at 12:04am - intimacy - by Cslouth - United States (New York)

Today, it's the five year anniversary of the day I broke up with my girlfriend to see other people. I've not had sex a single time since. FML

#20134961
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12023) - you deserved it (56145)

On 10/27/2012 at 12:04am - intimacy - by Cslouth - United States (New York)

Today, my grandma took it upon herself to give me the sex talk. After explaining the mechanics in excessive detail, she said I shouldn't be afraid to sleep around. Apparently, I need to be comfortable with the man who'll be "conning me into blowing him for the next 50 years." FML

#20134273
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25653) - you deserved it (2492)

On 10/26/2012 at 1:58pm - intimacy - by fiftyshardsofbroccoli (woman) - United States

Today, my roommate decided to go vegan after watching a PETA video. She began this new-found lifestyle by throwing out all of the non-vegan items in the house, including some prime rib we had recently purchased, all of our ice cream, and my chocolate stash. FML

#20133890
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23066) - you deserved it (1911)

On 10/26/2012 at 3:58am - health - by Weasel123 - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I went out to a restaurant with a girl I have been dating. The only conversation was about how proud she was of her fart during work earlier, and how she managed to clear out a section of the office. FML

#20133872
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18755) - you deserved it (2656)

On 10/26/2012 at 3:23am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found a notebook my 12-year-old sister had been doodling in. Turns out the "doodles" were poems full of obscenities and descriptions of how she wanted to hurt herself. When I showed it to my mom, she accused me of writing the notebook myself to frame my sister. FML

#20133698
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23933) - you deserved it (1914)

On 10/26/2012 at 12:38am - kids - by familyofpsychos - United States (Nebraska)

Today, after therapy for obsessing over every woman who talks to me, all I could think about was how I could seduce my therapist. I think I still need a lot of help. FML

#20133155
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20019) - you deserved it (5069)

On 10/25/2012 at 7:09pm - love - by mental - United States

Today, I had a job interview for a job I've been dying to have. As I'm walking into the office, the manager says, "Aren't you my son's ex, the one he cheated on?" All I could do was sit there quietly as he laughed at me. FML

#20129479
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26899) - you deserved it (2030)

On 10/23/2012 at 3:54am - work - by emilyparra1 - United States (Florida)



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