About amelia_suhayda : I like cooking, music, hockey, and schadenfreude.
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You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
amelia_suhayda's favorite FMLs
by damn it rose / 05/31/2014 at 9:40am / United Kingdom (Derby) / Love
Today, I'm babysitting two 6 year old kids. One of them won't stop screaming, and the other kid found his mom's vibrator and won't stop playing spaceship with it. The parents will be home in an hour. FML
by moomanjohnny / 05/31/2014 at 2:40am / United States (California) / Kids
by save me / 05/30/2014 at 6:33pm / Belgium (Antwerpen) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was partying with friends. At around midnight, I sent a text message to my friend to reassure her, saying that of course I could handle my drink. That's the last thing I can remember about the evening. It's a total blank from that point onwards. FML
by julie24 / 05/29/2014 at 10:30pm / France / Miscellaneous
Today, a girl asked me out on a date to some hot springs, about 2 hours away. After a mile hike, the springs were finally in sight. She then slipped and cut her shin open. I had carry her the mile back and drive her the 2 hours to the ER, where her parents, whom I'd never met, were waiting. FML
by jonchavez / 05/29/2014 at 7:46pm / United States (Kentucky) / Love
by bananna / 05/29/2014 at 11:18am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids
by Idk / 05/29/2014 at 2:46am / United States (Florida) / Animals
Today, after waiting 2 hours for my landlord to leave so I could take a shit in peace, I sat down on the toilet. The doorbell immediately rang. It was my landlord, who wanted to let me know that he had just backed into my car. FML
by chubbs / 05/28/2014 at 5:07pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by angelamegan21 / 05/28/2014 at 4:33pm / United States (Florida) / Health
by _Ducks_ / 05/28/2014 at 12:08am / United States (California) / Kids
by JayCee500 / 05/27/2014 at 7:05pm / Health
Today, my husband thought it would be hilarious to slip a little fake blood into the bathtub while I was relaxing in it, eyes closed. When I opened my eyes, the water was one big cloud of red. I screamed so loud that I might as well have been dying, and yes, he recorded everything. FML
by N O / 05/27/2014 at 2:47pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
Today, I came down with diarrhea thanks to a particularly low-class restaurant. My dad has been making constant stupid puns like "pretty shitty state you're in" and "this day and age, you just don't expect this crap". I'm at the point where I want to gouge his eyes out with a goddamn spoon. FML
by fuckmuppet / 05/27/2014 at 1:04pm / United Kingdom (Oxfordshire) / Health
Today, at school, I got seated in front of the resident creepy kid that everyone stayed away from. I was pretty relieved to get through most of the class with no incidents, until the bell rang and he tore out a chunk of my hair, yelling "DNA! DNA!" FML
by Laura / 05/27/2014 at 11:58am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 05/26/2014 at 11:53am / United States (California) / Love