Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

amelia_suhayda

Offline (the 03/03/2015 at 6:39am) | Search for a member

amelia_suhayda

1Liked!

amelia_suhaydaamelia_suhayda
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 30 December 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 10984
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About amelia_suhayda : I like cooking, music, hockey, and schadenfreude.

amelia_suhayda's page activity

Visits<b>flupsht</b> - 19 hours ago<b>xxthechosenguyxx</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 4:42pm<b>colton_colton</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 2:08pm<b>sleepwalker13</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 1:05am<b>Devindelon</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 5:06pm<b>roza_and_dimka</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 1:43pm<b>whitty06</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 7:30am<b>darnellq</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 6:31am<b>robertd73</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 12:47am<b>Mathis92987</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 5:28pm<b>rgnrk</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 1:48pm<b>Amo1216</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 7:41am<b>youngsparrow</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 7:01am<b>maxyutd</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 5:17am<b>SlashingAverV2</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 3:32am<b>Matt_Hazard</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 3:37pm<b>terryaly</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 12:41am<b>lan356</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 11:24pm

Liked!<b>nitsuganayrem</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 4:51am

amelia_suhayda's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of amelia_suhayda's badges

amelia_suhayda's favorite FMLs

Today, as I was taking out the trash, I spotted my cute neighbor doing the same. In a rush to get out before he went back inside, I slipped on my iced-over porch. I passed out and woke up with a note on my chest saying, "I unlocked your door but you were too heavy to drag inside". FML

#21027337
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46895) - you deserved it (7323)

On 01/14/2014 at 1:48am - misc - by rholt (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I took a nap in my car right after finishing up at work. I was woken up by a hobo sitting in the passenger seat, watching me sleep. Apparently, he'd managed to unlock the door with a wire hanger. FML

#21027083
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45896) - you deserved it (5390)

On 01/13/2014 at 10:31pm - misc - by ShelterForTheHomless (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I puked up an anti-nausea pill. FML

#21026645
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49717) - you deserved it (4494)

On 01/13/2014 at 3:35pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, before a blind date with a girl set up by my flatmate, I put some aftershave on. Then I realised I had forgotten my contact lenses. When I put them in it caused so much pain that in my attempt to reach the bathroom I walked into a wall. When I got there, she saw my swollen face and left. FML

Today, I found out that whenever my ex-wife is late getting the kids to school, she tells them to tell their teachers they were with me, and forges my name on the sign-in sheet. Missing homework? Dad's house. Forgot to bring something important? Ditto. The school thinks I'm a horrible parent. FML

Today, my husband and I decided to have a quickie before the kids woke up from their nap. The sex was amazing and I couldn't hold in my screams or not hit the wall. About 15 minutes in, both of our children came busting in with their nerf guns, screaming, "Where's the monster?" FML

#21025946
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53673) - you deserved it (32513)

On 01/12/2014 at 8:53pm - intimacy - by anon (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, it was my birthday, so when I woke up, I came downstairs yelling, "ALL I WANT FOR MY BIRTHDAY, IS A BIG BOOTY HOE," only to find that my family had thrown me a surprise party. All my grandparents were at the bottom of the stairs. FML

#21025933
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31802) - you deserved it (39468)

On 01/12/2014 at 8:40pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went to the doctor, only to find out I can no longer eat chocolate, my favorite food. When I got home, my boyfriend took the chocolate cake I'd been eating from the fridge, sat down in front of me, and ate the whole thing without breaking eye contact. FML

#21025897
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52009) - you deserved it (6534)

On 01/12/2014 at 8:00pm - health - by foreveralone - United States (Illinois)

Today, after his sixth beer, my dad looked me in the eye and said "I've never forgiven you for what you did to your mother's vagina". FML

#21025234
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57756) - you deserved it (5793)

On 01/12/2014 at 1:38am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was getting ready for a night out with the girls, and without any hint of trickery, just wanting an honest answer, I asked my boyfriend how I looked in the dress I chose. He immediately dropped to his knees, yelled, "NOOOOOOOOO!" and calmly left the room. FML

#21024776
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37776) - you deserved it (8284)

On 01/11/2014 at 6:13pm - misc - by -_-" (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, and every other night since my new neighbors moved in two weeks ago, their cat has been standing outside my house meowing constantly up at my window, where my cat keeps standing and meowing back. It's like a feline version of Romeo and Juliet, and I can't sleep. FML

#21024543
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45876) - you deserved it (4940)

On 01/11/2014 at 1:52pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Dominican Republic (Distrito Nacional)

Today, after much debate I let my mom wax my eyebrows. Now I get to look super surprised until they grow back. FML

#21024170
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37505) - you deserved it (9304)

On 01/11/2014 at 12:49am - misc - by madib33 (woman) - United States

Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at my dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, "Would you like to try the McRib while it's back?" FML

#21023934
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46412) - you deserved it (8730)

On 01/10/2014 at 9:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend saw a YouTube video of a guy throwing boiling water into the cold air, with the water immediately turning to ice and vapor. He copied it, but only succeeded in dousing himself with boiling water, then making me drive his idiot self to the hospital. FML

#21023480
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43260) - you deserved it (5115)

On 01/10/2014 at 11:12am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I'm trapped in my apartment, due to the fact that five raccoons have decided to sit outside my only door and prevent me from getting out. Every time I look at one, they hiss at me. FML

#21023350
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42992) - you deserved it (5316)

On 01/10/2014 at 6:15am - animals - by RaccoonFever - United States (California)



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #12
  • Another month, another bunch of shitposts. Yes, it's time to delve into the postbag and have another look at the weird and wonderful stuff we've been sent by people from all over the world. Hope you…

Tuesday 3 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: