Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

amelia_suhayda

Search for a member

amelia_suhayda

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 30 December 1990 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4489
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About amelia_suhayda : I like cooking, music, hockey, and schadenfreude.

amelia_suhayda's page activity

Visits<b>SlashingAverV2</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 3:32am<b>Matt_Hazard</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 3:37pm<b>terryaly</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 12:41am<b>lan356</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 11:24pm<b>nitsuganayrem</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 10:46pm<b>kanue28</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 2:53pm<b>16characters</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 2:12pm<b>fboy1588</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 5:35am<b>roza_and_dimka</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 10:09pm<b>austinn_lynn</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 8:53pm<b>RubenTheGreek</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 5:53pm<b>Vayu</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 4:45pm<b>Wabbajack789</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 4:44pm<b>subertm</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 3:50pm<b>shainj78</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 3:21pm<b>coolsoccer1234</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 2:25pm<b>westboundcali</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 1:26pm<b>GIGA_IMPACT</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 12:30pm

Liked!<b>nitsuganayrem</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 4:51am

amelia_suhayda's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of amelia_suhayda's badges

amelia_suhayda's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my bald, goatee-sporting chemistry teacher that he looks like Walt from Breaking Bad. I quickly got sent to the principal's office and received a 3-day suspension for "slandering" my teacher by implying that he makes meth. FML

#20574865
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33966) - you deserved it (5988)

On 04/04/2013 at 4:07pm - misc - by me (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was trying out my first vibrator. Soon enough, my 12-year-old sister opened my door, walked in, and saw me naked from the waist down. She laughed, called me a virgin, and left. FML

#20574621
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51875) - you deserved it (17638)

On 04/04/2013 at 12:04pm - intimacy - by Ribbed for Her Disaster (woman) - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, my girlfriend said that while she was playing volleyball, her whole life flashed before her eyes. According to her grandmother, my girlfriend is now psychic. She completely believes it. FML

#20574330
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29152) - you deserved it (3044)

On 04/04/2013 at 4:20am - misc - by CrazyBitch - United States (California)

Today, it was my wedding day. Three people showed up. My mom, my dad, and the priest. FML

#20574279
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60202) - you deserved it (4456)

On 04/04/2013 at 2:46am - love - by nobodylovesme (woman) - United States (California)

Today, it was my friend's birthday, so I baked him a cake complete with his name written on it in homemade frosting. After I gave it to him, his mother berated me for it, saying I should have checked with her first before making a cake for her son. He's 28. FML

#20574002
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32270) - you deserved it (2361)

On 04/03/2013 at 10:51pm - misc - by JaneDoe (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was on a scavenger hunt. One of the things on the list was to ask a stranger to marry them. I saw an old lady in a wheel chair; I tried to make her day by asking her to marry me. She declined and attempted to run me over with her wheel chair. FML

#20573755
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20968) - you deserved it (29887)

On 04/03/2013 at 8:24pm - misc - by nickcedola40 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my washing machine broke down, within its warranty. I asked my neighbour if she could open the door for the mechanic while I was at work; she agreed. When I came home, I had a bill for 80 bucks for not opening the door. Her reason? She was busy watching her favorite TV show. FML

#20573502
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31966) - you deserved it (4584)

On 04/03/2013 at 5:40pm - money - by Jack -

Today, I was approached by a What Not to Wear kind of show, where you get money to buy a new wardrobe. I was so excited that I fainted. They revoked the offer, reasoning that someone who faints so easily would be too much of a liability risk. FML

#20573162
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33986) - you deserved it (9887)

On 04/03/2013 at 12:57pm - misc - by SoClose (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I dropped our daughter. Our hypothetical daughter. Represented by a stuffed owl. FML

#20572997
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46597) - you deserved it (5531)

On 04/03/2013 at 9:32am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I seemingly decided not to remove my foot from the pedal-clip of my bicycle until I had properly introduced myself to the cement. FML

#20572944
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24664) - you deserved it (5943)

On 04/03/2013 at 8:06am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was lost in a foreign city so I asked a girl for directions. She replied, "Directions? ONE DIRECTION!" and started screaming in my face and jumping around. FML

#20572868
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43005) - you deserved it (5200)

On 04/03/2013 at 5:17am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I met my boyfriend's family for the first time. We got on the subject of theatre, and his dad brought up "The Book of Mormon", how finally someone was making fun of those "nasty, polygamist, cultist freaks", and if his son ever dated one, he would disown him. I'm Mormon. FML

#20572732
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38439) - you deserved it (13244)

On 04/03/2013 at 1:48am - love - by kenabrookee - United States (California)

Today, my cousin is visiting from Oklahoma. He can't go a minute without saying "YOLO" or "Swag". He's going to be here for a week. FML

#20572695
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41994) - you deserved it (3514)

On 04/03/2013 at 1:20am - misc - by fuck YOLO - United States (California)

Today, in my job as an assistant at a music venue, I had to get posters signed by that night's performer. When I walked into the dressing room, I was told, "unless you're sucking my cock then get the fuck out of here" and had the posters slapped out of my hands. It's my job to deal with these pricks. FML

#20572312
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34533) - you deserved it (3087)

On 04/02/2013 at 9:26pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my older brother walked in on me while I was wearing nothing but a bra, panties, pantyhose, and high heels. I'm his little brother. FML

#20572069
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22193) - you deserved it (65483)

On 04/02/2013 at 6:52pm - misc - by SayCheese - Canada (British Columbia)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: